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Thursday, March 6, 2014

Client Cooperation

Whether you want to change a behavior to improve your health or you simply want to learn how to relax, hypnosis is an effective, natural and drug-free tool that facilitates behavior change by accessing the subconscious mind. However, you must want to change your behavior in order for hypnotherapy to work.

As I explained in my December 27, 2013 blog, “suggestibility” is how we communicate and learn. Even though you can be suggestible to many people, you are most suggestible to yourself. Therefore, I incorporate the specific words/expressions you used to describe your emotions and motivations/desire to effect the desired change when I craft your hypnotic script (suggestions). This means that you will be hypnotizing yourself.

Many people wonder if hypnosis will really work—and how it can work—on someone who has a razor-sharp mind and such a strong will (i.e., a stubborn streak) like theirs. Even though it is natural to subconsciously resist the process of becoming hypnotized at first, these initial doubts may even help to deepen your relaxation and comfort once you enter the hypnotic trance. However, you will not successfully change your behavior if you do not want to make this change.

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

How Hypnosis Has Helped Me

I graduated from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute as a certified hypnotherapist in 2005. Since then, I have helped many clients achieve various vocational and avocational self-improvement goals such as quit smoking, overcome a fear of flying or driving, improve self-confidence and self-esteem, overcome test anxiety, improve study skills and improve sport performance. Following are some examples of how my hypnotherapy training has helped me to achieve some of my own self-improvement goals and change unwanted behaviors.

· Overcome my anxiety about driving on freeways. John Kappas, Ph.D.’s Theory of Mind model was the biggest influence here: Since the mind is uncomfortable about and resists doing unknown activities, I knew I would feel more relaxed and comfortable driving freeways by just doing it. It took me a few weeks of round-trip journeys to HMI in Tarzana and reminding myself that once freeway driving was no longer an unknown to me that I truly did get comfortable navigating Southern California’s biggest and busiest motorways.

· Increase and improve my patience with myself (and others): Before I started my hypnotherapy training, I was usually very tense and impatient (usually with myself). Now, when I get frustrated I immediately use cognitive behavioral therapy techniques to disarm negative self-talk and reframe the situation by turning it into a learning experience.

· “Keep calm and carry on.” Sir Winston Churchill was right: the calmer you are, the easier it will be to survive a crisis. Now that I can recognize and identify my potential stress triggers, I can employ relaxation and breathing techniques to maintain a calm and relaxed demeanor to weather just about any kind of storm—literal or metaphoric. These days, what would have been a “crisis” ten years ago is a non-event because I am able to remain calm and relaxed; in turn, this mellow state enables me to focus on the situation and come up with an appropriate solution to the problem.

· Take better care of myself. One of the extra benefits of my hypnotherapy training is that I learned a lot about how maintaining a healthy lifestyle (or not) affects my mood and ability to function during the day. I try to eat a well-balanced diet and get plenty of sleep at night so I can remain energetic and focused on what I am doing during the day and avoid that jittery feeling I get if I drink too much coffee or my blood-sugar level starts to drop when I haven’t eaten in a long time.

· Analyze my dreams. Dream analysis helps my clients to work through unresolved issues in their lives. It is a lot of fun for me—and very enlightening—to analyze my own dreams to find out what my subconscious mind is really trying to tell me!

When you are ready to learn more about what your subconscious mind has to tell you, give hypnotherapy a try. It is definitely a mind-opening experience—and you will get to enjoy a mental massage in the process!

Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Parataxic Distortion

Imagine that you are having a conversation with your partner or spouse about your plans for the weekend. The conversation is relatively banal until the other person casually mentions that you still haven’t replied to the neighbor’s invitation to their party on Saturday. “Are we going or not?”

Bam! It’s like someone flipped a switch in you. Just like that, the joking mood and light-hearted banter evaporate in the heat of your sudden, apparently inexplicable rage: “Why are you asking me? You sound just like my mother. Why can’t you ever make a decision about what to do?”

Or, you are watching a movie in happy, relaxed silence when your companion starts whispering (loud) comments about the film in your ear. Another person in the audience glares at you and hisses, “Sshhh!” even though you haven’t said a word. You are furious that you have been blamed for the disturbance—especially because this incident is so like that time you were punished for talking during silent-reading period at school (twenty years ago), and you didn’t say anything then, either. Your companion, who is indifferent to the other movie-goer's annoyance and oblivious to the memory it has triggered in you, is hurt and confused because you barely speak to him the rest of the night. Didn’t you like the movie?

These are examples of a parataxic distortion response: a reaction to a subconscious memory that is totally unrelated to the person or incident that you are responding to. Anything from the tone of voice in which a question was asked, a facial expression or the specific words that another person used could trigger this reaction. The power of this emotional response are likely to take the person responding this way by surprise, not to mention the unintended target(s) of this reaction.

Monday, March 3, 2014

Suggestibility on Prime Time

Did you watch the 86th Academy Awards on television Sunday night? Remember when host Ellen DeGeneres asked viewers to retweet the group “selfie” picture that host Ellen DeGeneres took of herself with a handful of Oscar nominees during the broadcast? Did you do it? If so, you weren’t alone: according to a CNN report, 2.7 million people took on her challenge, and the Twitter platform actually crashed for a few minutes. The event was undoubtedly a major advertising and publicity triumph for the Oscars and the company that manufactured the camera they used to take the shot (Samsung)—not to mention the host. This incident was also a great opportunity for me to illustrate how suggestibility and hypnosis work in real life.

In my January 16, 2014 blog about hypnotic modalities, I explained how an authority figure could create a hyper-suggestible state in another person and use this state to persuade that individual to behave in a particular way. (If you have ever gone car shopping, you have likely experienced this kind of sensory overload.) She may not have literally sold an item to her audience, but Ms. DeGeneres did a very handy demonstration of group hypnosis with just a few elements naturally occurring elements:

1. She had authority. As the Oscar host, Ellen DeGeneres had access to all areas of the stage and the audience in the auditorium. A celebrity herself, she also had charisma and charm that helped her to build a rapport with the guests as well as television viewers at home.

2. She had a message. The role of any host at a party or event is to help the guests feel at ease and have a good time so that, hopefully, they will want to come back again. The Academy Awards may be an American event, but it is known around the world. No doubt the Academy and the television network wanted to receive positive reviews and feedback so they could do this again, next year. What better way to get this message out than to take a photograph of some of your guests having a good time and share that image with everyone you know (or who wishes they knew you)?

3. There were plenty of environmental stimuli to overload the subconscious mind and create the hyper-suggestible state: the excitement of being nominated for or having won an Academy Award, or the disappointment of not winning that Oscar, after all; the visual overload of being surrounded by beautiful people wearing beautiful clothes; the amount of time the nominees had already spent posing on the red carpet before the awards began; the anxiety/stress that they must have been experiencing while they waited for the award to be bestowed in their category; waiting and wondering who would win an Oscar; the glamorous environment in the Kodak Theater and the stage… You get the picture.

4. Ms. DeGeneres used the right language to get the group of nominees to do the photo with her. Not only did she have the advantage of being the host for the night, but she knew how and when to cajole one of the A-list actors sitting in the front rows to join the group. Soon, some actors just jumped into the shot without waiting for an invitation.

5. Watching the scene from home on our televisions or computers, etc., it looked like everyone in the shot was smiling and having fun. Didn’t you wish you could have been in on that picture, too? (Or one just like it, but with your friends and family?) When Bradley Cooper finally snapped the picture, the audience at home and in the theater was ready and waiting to be asked (or told/playfully challenged) to retweet the image so many times that Twitter couldn’t cope with all the traffic.

6. And hey, presto: 2.7 million people accepted and acted on Ellen DeGeneres’ suggestion.

Now, that is impressive.

Sunday, March 2, 2014

Dealing with Disappointment

At some time in our lives, each of us experiences a disappointment. It hurts; it can even make us angry, because that thing or person or event that you wanted or expected to happen, falls through. Perhaps you did not make the football team or cheerleading squad this year. Your “dream” college rejected your application. The love of your life and the person you believed to be your future spouse turned out to be just a summer romance. You were one of the few Academy Award nominees on your award-winning movie who did not receive an Oscar tonight. How did you handle this disappointment? What did you do?

Since you were born, your subconscious mind has learned and knows only two kinds of responses: pleasure and pain. In the context of the examples above, when you get what you want (or worked or wished for), you may experience pleasure. When you don’t get these things, you may experience pain in the form of disappointment. This pain may feel, be or seem exponential if you have experienced similar disappointments in the past. After all, if this kind of thing has happened before, your subconscious mind must know how to “do” this, right? Or, what if your subconscious mind just takes this message unit (e.g., failure at, disappointment at) and stockpiles it as a "known" for the next time you’re in a similar situation?

Everything you had and then lost—or almost had and then lost—last night, last week, last month, last year felt like the worst of the worst kind of pain you have ever experienced. But, you got through that pain (somehow) and went on to triumph in another way, on another day, right? You must have, because you are reading this blog right now. You will get up again tomorrow morning, too, and start over again, because that is what your subconscious mind also knows how to do. Your subconscious mind works, wants and loves to please you. This is true even when it seems like your SCM is hanging onto memories of this pain and repeating your negative, mental chatter as if to sabotage next time’s chance for you, too.

Hypnotherapy and therapeutic guided imagery are great ways with which to deal with a disappointment, because both tools give you direct access to the area where the emotional reaction to that experience has occurred—your subconscious mind. During hypnosis and guided imagery, you can explore alternative scenarios to what happened and other ways you could have responded in this situation, including possible benefits to not have realized this particular dream. (For more information John Kappas, Ph.D.’s technique of “Turning it around,” read my February 19, 2014 blog.) While you are in this relaxed state, you can also learn a new response to disappointment: replace the old response (e.g., hurt, anger, sadness) it with “X” (a positive, optimistic, etc. emotion of your choosing) for having an opportunity to experience “Y.” Then, anchor the new emotion to the sensation of feeling relaxed, comfortable, etc. that you experienced in hypnosis or during your guided-imagery journey, so the next time your wish for today didn’t come true, you can feel relaxed and positive about still being in the game for next time.

Friday, February 28, 2014

Oh, I Love a Rainy Night!

Photo courtesy of Microsoft

This week, finally, it rained in Southern California. Not just a drizzle or the light showers that have been passing for rain for the past year or so. Oh, no. We got a heavy downpour on Wednesday night and then, today—all day—we got real, honest-to-goodness, I-mean-business rain. And I couldn’t be happier about it.

Just like Eddie Rabbitt sings in his hit song, “I Love a Rainy Night,” rain quite simply makes me feel good. It washes the metaphoric cobwebs out of my mind the way it cleans the months-old accumulation of dirt and dust off of the leaves and plants outside. Best of all, rain gives me an opportunity—okay, an excuse—to really enjoy some down time and relax. I allowed myself to sleep in this morning. Then, I spent a good part of the afternoon snuggling up in front of the hearth with a mug of hot chocolate and read a novel I’ve been trying to finish.

I also love the way rain energizes me to choose to do things I have been putting off. Earlier this evening, I organized my hypnotherapy library—including books about health and nutrition, relaxation and general motivation. In fact, I got so motivated that I even tackled about 10 years’ worth of books and magazines about horses/animal husbandry, riding and horse-training, which I reference when I work with my equestrian clients.

Rain even inspires me to start a new project: while I wrote this blog, I finished downloading and printing the handbook for Cheryl O’Neil’s “Healing the Inner Child Within” Hypnosis and Imagery course. Tomorrow, I will be a student again!

But, tonight, I will fall asleep listening to the music of rain on my windows and, fingers crossed, the sound of thunder rumbling and crackling overhead.

I love rain…

Thursday, February 27, 2014

Hypnotherapy for Children and Teenagers

Over the years, many of my clients have wanted to work on similar self-improvement issues: increase self-confidence/self-esteem, improve sport performance, increase focus/memory, manage fears and phobias, or to overcome social anxiety. The majority of these clients have been adults. However, I can and do work with children and teenagers. For the most part, a child’s hypnotherapy session is very similar to the grown-up’s: I discuss what behavior(s) the person would like to change, and I use the context of John Kappas, Ph.D.’s Theory of Mind to explain how the current, unwanted behavior was established—and how it will be replaced by a more effective, desired strategy. During hypnosis, I provide general suggestions for relaxation and guided imagery that is specifically tailored for my client. Following are some of the major differences between my hypnotherapy work with children (under 18 years old) and adults:

1. I must have a signed consent document from the child’s parents in order to work with anyone under 18 years old. If the parents are divorced and share custody of the child, both parents must still sign a consent-release form which I provide. If only one parent or has custody of the child, the legal guardian must sign the document.

2. The parents and legal guardians have a legal right to know some details about the hypnotherapy that their child or teenager is receiving. They also have a right to know whether the minor is using drugs or engaging in underage sex or dangerous behavior, or is threatening to harm him- or herself or others.

3. I respect the youngster’s right to privacy and confidentiality whenever possible, but I also encourage the individual to confide in his or her parents, if/when it is appropriate.

4. When I work with minors, I always invite my client’s parents or guardian to be present during the hypnosis.

5. The amount of time a young child will spend in hypnosis during the hypnotherapy session will be much shorter than what an adult or even a teenager will spend. While I typically use breathing/relaxation exercises to induce hypnosis in all of my clients, I also employ some kind of eye-fascination technique to hypnotize a child under age 14. (I usually do not use eye-fascination techniques to induce hypnosis in an adult).

Finally, as a certified hypnotherapist, California law allows me to provide hypnotherapy as a complementary or alternative treatment to help my clients to achieve vocational and avocational self-improvement goals (Business and Professions Code 2908). If your child or teenager’s issues are, or become, beyond my scope of expertise as a hypnotherapist, I will refer you to a licensed medical doctor or psychologist for further evaluation and/or treatment.