(A version of this blog was originally posted on January
31, 2014)
It is Friday
night. Perhaps you have just completed your work week; or, maybe you just
clocked in for the first of several night/closing shifts at one of your jobs.
The promise of Saturday and Sunday—the weekend—looms
large. Will you have time to complete all of those projects you promised your
spouse that you would definitely, absolutely complete by Sunday night? Does the
company you work for give its employees Labor Day off so you can enjoy a long
weekend hanging out with your friends and family? Perhaps your boss refused to
give you that day off, after all, and now you are bound and determined to
remain in a foul mood all weekend so others can know how angry and frustrated
you are. Or, are your friends and colleagues amazed that, yes, you are actually
very happy to have to be working or on-call at work because you are thankful to
have a job in the first place.
Believe it or
not, your subconscious mind largely determines everything that you will do this
weekend, from whether you will have the weekend “off” or will be at work. The
“knowns” in your subconscious mind will influence whether you get together to
celebrate the unofficial end of summer. Your subconscious mind influences
whether you will make a genuine effort to fix the kitchen cabinets or
ultimately postpone the project another week. Your subconscious mind influences
which tasty tidbits you expect to be served at the annual Labor Day Block Party:
you really don’t want to attend, but you just can’t resist Domino’s pizza and
Buffalo wings combination and, anyway, it would look really bad if you are the
only person from work who is a no-show.
Finally, the mental
scripts, or “known” beliefs and behaviors, in your subconscious mind will
determine how you react to everything that occurs this weekend. A rule in
physics states: “Every action has an equal and opposite reaction.” Similarly, over
the years you have learned that specific relationships exist between emotions
about/reactions to a specific, related event: If my team wins a championship, I
will be happy; if it loses, I will be sad/angry/etc. If I do my best, hard work
to complete a project that I promised to do for my spouse, I will feel good
about this work, my spouse will be happy and this task is over; if I do not
complete this job, everyone will be angry and defensive. If you attend the
block party and the food is as tasty and wonderful as you expected it to be,
you might find that you will have a better time at the event than you expected;
but if the host only provides chips and salsa (or any/every other dish other
than the one you wanted), you will wish you never showed up in the first place.
This weekend,
why not try something different to break this chain of expectations and
behaviors? Before you start your shift at work or when you get home and kick
off your shoes to relax on the sofa, or before you head out for that barbecue,
take several slow, deep breaths. Visualize, imagine, picture or pretend that
you are doing “x” activity, and you feel relaxed and comfortable the entire
time. You are focused on doing your very best at work or to complete a chore at
home. You see yourself smiling and enjoying yourself as you socialize and with
the people around you. Visualize, imagine, picture or pretend that you see
yourself being polite and enjoying yourself with your neighbors. Since the
subconscious cannot tell the difference between fantasy and reality, allow this
visualization exercise to create new “knowns” in your mind and become your new
reality or experience.
I hope you have
a great weekend!
Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in
Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation
Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy®
and to set up an appointment, please
visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.
© 2014
