I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE!
(This blog was
originally posted on January 5, 2015)
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Have you ever ignored or tried to “freeze out” or just stop
talking to someone you are arguing with once emotions start running high? Has
your spouse, partner or friend ever done this to you? Sometimes people avoid
visiting or contacting someone who is seriously or even terminally ill as a
means of denying the seriousness of the disease and protecting yourself from
experiencing any emotional distress that this contact may trigger in you. These
scenarios are examples of withdrawal, a powerful defense
mechanism in which a person shuts off communication with another individual or
even physically withdraws from an unpleasant circumstance as a means of
self-protection.
Like other defense mechanisms, withdrawal is: 1) unconscious;
2) self-deceptive; 3) and it distorts reality through thoughts and action.
“Change is a threat to the subconscious mind,” said John Kappas, Ph.D. According to
the Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder’s Theory
of Mind,
people are subconsciously motivated to maintain and/or restore a known physical
and emotional status of comfort and security. Whenever someone says or does
something that causes physical injury, hurts your feelings or challenges your
beliefs, the mind automatically tries to compensate for this threat or “pain”
by activating this or another form of defense mechanism.
To help a client work through this defense mechanism, I would start by asking
about the nature of the fear and how this fear is negatively affecting your
daily life and interactions with others. Do you withdraw from others during an
argument to avoid having to face the negative implications of “losing” the
debate or being wrong about a philosophical opinion? Once you have identified
the specific motivation behind the avoidance, in hypnosis I would desensitize you to those
negative associations and employ guided-imagery techniques so you
could imagine how it would feel to listen to a different opinion and be open to
learning something new.
In another example, if you are emotionally withdrawing from or avoiding a
terminally ill relative because you don't want to face her own mortality, I
would explore your conceptions about death and dying and what losing this
person means/would mean to you. To further help prepare you for visiting the
patient, I would desensitize you to hear fear/anxiety and any expectations or
ideas you may have about the person’s illness and any expectations you hold
about what you might perceive or experience during the interaction. I would use
guided-imagery techniques to help you imagine feeling calm, comfortable and
relaxed during your interactions with the person so you can enjoy the time you
spend together.
Sara
R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern
California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been
voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row
(2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up
an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/
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2023
