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| Photo courtesy of Sara Fogan |
One of the most important
components of having a “good” relationship with your (or any) horse is that you
respect each other. I described the importance of respect in the human-equine
relationship in my blog titled “When Respect Equals Love, Part 1” (May 21, 2014).
I also suggested some techniques to increase your horse’s respect in the blog
titled, “When Respect Equals Love, Part 2” (May 22, 2014). When we work with
them, we expect the horse to identify us (humans) as their herd leader. We
expect them to stays out of our personal space and to move in the direction we
ask, when we ask. However, for this relationship to work we need treat the
horse as a sentient individual that has its own emotions, thoughts and
motivations. Even though we assume an assertive or even a dominant role in our
interactions, ideally we communicate what we want the horse to do rather than
dominate and try to overpower it to get our way. These attempts to overpower
and force a horse to do what we want rarely, if ever, work. An average-size horse outweighs
the average-size man by nine or ten times, it is capable of running 30 to 40
miles per hour, and it can land a very powerful (and potentially lethal) kick
when it feels cornered.
The irony is that we are
probably more likely to be injured working with or around our own very gentle, docile and affectionate
horse than another equine we don’t know as well at the barn where we ride. Why?
Because the routine we have with our horse—grooming, riding, bathing, feeding,
giving treats, etc.—is familiar, comfortable, a known. Many of us find that just being around our horse is incredibly
relaxing and even comforting (I
certainly do). But relaxation around horses can and often does translate into
carelessness. We duck underneath our horse’s neck to get to and groom the other
side of his body. We walk into the pasture to catch him while he is turned out
with other horses, discounting or ignoring the fact that the treats we are
carrying for our horse will also attract his herd-mates. This scenario could
quickly become very dangerous if our horse and the other animals try to bowl us
over to get to the treats. We forget (or neglect) to wear sturdy boots to the
barn to make sure that our horses have been fed and have enough water for the night,
and our diligence is rewarded with a gentle stomp on our unprotected instep. Or,
you forget (or neglect) to put on a helmet before heading out on a short trail
ride. When a bird suddenly, noisily explodes out of a nearby bush, your terrified
(bombproof) gelding bucks, spins, and dumps you on the ground as he bolts back
to the stable.
Now, imagine a different
scenario in which you are riding or grooming a horse that you don’t know very
well. For example, I am almost a different person when I handle any horse other
than my own. Whenever I lead my trainer’s stallions to or from the turnout, or
groom or clip any of her other mares or geldings, it is like I am crossing
every “t” and dotting every “i” in terms of following safety protocol. I don’t
really know any of these animals as well as I do my own horse, which means that
I must consciously (and subconsciously) be more aware that I should always be
on my guard in case one of them, well, acts like a horse. I know each of those
horses well enough to be able to identify their individual behavioral quirks
and idiosyncrasies; but at the end of the day, even though each animal is
bigger and stronger than me, when I am working with them I am the alpha in the herd.
While we expect our horse to respect
our role as the herd leader in the horse-human partnership, humans must reciprocate
this respect for this relationship to be successful. Whether your horse is a hunter/jumper,
cutter, dressage, endurance/trail horse, etc., he or she is a very intelligent
and powerful and likely highly trained animal. The horse has opinions about
what is going on around him or her, and has opinions about what he or she wants
(or doesn’t want) to do. Even though we know, consciously, that our horse is
not an oversized puppy, the kind of love he or she really needs from us does
not come from the carrots we offer, or the kisses or the marathon grooming
sessions we provide. Our horses need to know that they can’t push us around,
run us over or scare us away from horses and riding forever when they shy
because a leaf just crunched under their hooves. Even though we love and
sometimes love “on” them, we must respect our equine partner(s) for being a horse and all of the physical
and symbolic power this implies. And we will show our respect by being the
leader they need us to be.
Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a
certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with
honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more
information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy®, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.
© 2014
