(This blog was originally posted on December 3,
2014)
 |
|
Photo courtesy of Sara Fogan
My friend’s
Lusitano stallion, Galhoso, reawakened my
love of horses and riding; he also inspired my
passion for dressage. |
Throughout
our lifetime, we are suggestible to various influences. As very young children,
we learn to emulate the beliefs and behaviors of our primary caretaker. As I
described in my blog titled Where
Does Suggestibility Come From?, suggestibility
refers to how we learn and process information. According to Hypnosis
Motivation Founder John G. Kappas,
Ph.D., we get our early suggestibility from how the primary caretaker
(usually the mother) takes care of and interacts with us during early childhood
(birth up to age 5). When we are around 8 years old, the secondary caretaker
(usually dad) has more influence over our suggestibility, while peers, teachers
and others impact suggestibility between the ages of six and nine. By the time
we are adults, our suggestibility is pretty much established but our
subconscious mind remains receptive to other people’s suggestions if they resonate
with our established known behaviors or interests.
Nearly
three years ago, one of my childhood friends bought me a ticket for a Bon Jovi concert in Los Angeles. She and her
sister had both flown into town for their mother’s birthday, and the
opportunity to see the concert with them that weekend was icing on the cake for
me. They have been fans of Bon Jovi almost as long as I have known them. In
fact, Jennifer was the one who first introduced me to their music seven years
ago. She actually had to work pretty hard to convince me to go with her, since
I was not a huge fan of rock ‘n roll and I didn’t really know much about this
band. I didn’t know the lyrics to any of their songs. But, Jennifer was one of
my best friends: I liked to hang out with her and I trusted her judgment when
she promised me that I really, truly, absolutely would have a great time if I
went. After all, she was the one who had introduced me to eating (and enjoying)
sushi and the joys of reading J.K. Rowling’s
Harry Potter series—and I had been
pretty resistant to doing either of those things at first, too. I decided that
I had nothing to lose and everything to gain, and I was right: I have been a
fan of the band ever since that first concert, and these days I am usually the
one asking my friends if another tour is in the works.
I
discovered dressage in a similar way. When I was working on my Master’s degree
in London in the 1990s, my former landlady—and now dear friend—introduced me to
the sport. Back then, when I thought about horses and riding, show-jumping or
galloping across a cross-country course were what caught my imagination. I was
actually a little disappointed when Sandra told me she rode dressage, but I
think that is because at the time I had no real idea what that discipline
entailed. When I returned to London in 2002 to attend another friend’s wedding,
I spent a few days with Sandra and her husband; during the visit, I asked if I
could go with her to the barn to meet her horse and watch her ride. I hadn’t
been on a horse in nearly 20 years, but Sandra and I had always bonded over our
mutual love of horses and riding. It
would be an understatement to say the experience was magical and inspiring. I
knew right away that my love of horses and interest in riding had never gone
away but had just been dormant for a long time.
After Sandra
finished her ride, she asked if I would like to sit on her horse for a few
minutes. Let’s just say that the five or so minutes I spent on Galhoso’s back
were a revelation. The Lusitano stallion was not only the most beautiful horse
I had ever seen and very kind; he was also the first stallion that I had ever
been on. Earlier that morning, Sandra had explained to me that the true power
of a horse’s movement comes from his hindquarters; boy did I feel that when she
clucked him into a trot for me. It felt like we were flying, and all I was
doing was a medium trot (rising) trot on a lunge line, no vertical jumps or
oxers in sight. This informal introduction to dressage opened the door to a
whole new world.
Within eighteen
months I had not only started riding again, but I bought my first horse. Even
though Geeves was a retired hunter, my trainer at the time mentioned that he
was looking for riders for his dressage team. I immediately thought of Sandra
and Galhoso and jumped at the chance. A year or so after Geeves passed away, I found
Galahad—my own “Gally”—a dressage horse whose powerful, free stride makes me
feel like I’m flying just like my friend’s stallion did all those years ago.
Something that is equally amazing to me
is, if not for the influence of two very special friends, when would I
have discovered these great passions on my own, if at all?
What hobby or
even a new relationship has a friend introduced to you?
Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in
Southern California. She graduated with honors from the
Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense
Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.
© 2015
