(This blog was originally posted on February
21, 2014)
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Me with Chris Cox at the Equine Affaire
Pomona, California in 2009
Photo courtesy of Sara Fogan
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For today’s blog, I thought I
would share the advice and words of wisdom that I have learned from some of my
favorite horsemen and horsewomen. While these pearls of wisdom were originally
spoken in the context of training horses and riders, the main theme of each of
these messages is also relevant for and applicable to just about every
human/life experience.
- Clinton Anderson: “Whoever moves his feet first, loses.” In one of his basic groundwork exercises, Mr. Anderson asks his horses to yield (swing) their hindquarters away from him. The purpose of this exercise is to teach the horse to respect the trainer by moving wherever and whenever the human asks him to go. (It is also a tool by which the trainer can gain better control of the horse’s body on the ground by temporarily destabilizing the animal’s power/balance in its hindquarters.) During the exercise, the horse should be the only one moving his or her feet. If the human has to move to get out of the horse’s way, the equine has essentially “won” a power advantage in the relationship because the person was unable to gain the horse’s respect. This model may be applied to the context of human-human relationships in that, at some time or another, everyone must remain firm and demand fair/respectful treatment from another person. Whether you typically give in to the other person’s demands or are the one who lays down the rules about conduct in a relationship, your behavior says a lot about you and your role (power/control) in that relationship.
- Chris Cox: “Ride with your eyes.” No matter what you are doing, it is important to keep your eyes open and focused on where you want to go. As you look in the direction you are traveling, you are subconsciously programming your body to prepare for that destination. Whether you look straight ahead, behind/above you or straight down at the ground, your subconscious mind is sending your body a message: This is where you will end up.
- Chris Cox also advised: “If you can ride a fast horse, you will never be on a runaway.” Sometimes things happen in life that will take you completely by surprise. You may suddenly find yourself having to deal with challenges you never thought could—or would—happen to you. Practice taking on more challenges and accepting additional responsibilities to stretch your comfort zone. Do things faster or slower than you are used to doing them, so you will be comfortable and emotionally prepared to rise to any challenge—and at any speed—if life throws a curve ball at you.
- Robert Dover: “Your horse must feel like he can do everything like a champion.” Confidence is the key to a successful outcome whether you are a horse or a human. The more confident you feel about yourself, how well you do your job, how good you are at your hobbies, how emotionally secure you feel in your relationships (romantic, family, etc.), the harder you will try to succeed at that endeavor. Continuing to set reasonable goals that you must work at—but are capable of achieving—and celebrating the recognition and other rewards of your success that you receive during this journey, will increase your enthusiasm and motivation to succeed.
Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in
Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation
Institute in 2005. For more
information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an
appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.
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