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| Photo by Rick Hustead |
Now that it is officially Spring, I have no excuse to postpone my Spring
cleaning. Specifically, to go through my closets and dresser drawers and
separate the clothes I still wear from the ones that just take up storage space.
The thing is, even the items I haven’t worn for years have a lot of sentimental
value and I just don’t want to get rid of them yet. Fortunately, I had a very
enlightening conversation with Linda Hammond,
one of my friends (and Network Referral Group
partner) about how to handle this issue.
Linda is the group’s interior-design “guru.” In addition to having
fabulous taste in color pallets and furniture placement, she also has practical
solutions for just about any (and every) home-decorating/organization crisis to
come along. Today’s informal topic was what to do with all the things I didn’t want
to be without, even though I haven’t thought about (let alone worn) one of
those items in ages. Her simple solution was simple. First: organize the
clothes into “must have,” “don’t want” and “can’t part with” categories. The articles
I wanted to keep would obviously be re-folded/placed on a hanger and put back
where I found them. The stuff I didn’t want anymore (or no longer fit into) would
go into a box to donate at a nearby Goodwill
or similar outlet. Finally the items I couldn’t bear to part with (yet) would
be placed in another box to store just out of reach but accessible if I really,
really can’t get rid of them yet—but one
day. That plan sounded do-able and I thanked her profusely for the suggestions.
When I thought about our conversation later in the evening, I was struck
by how practical this plan was and its similarity to some of the strategies I
help my hypnotherapy clients develop to address an uncomfortable issue.
1. Chunk it down (divide the items into discrete categories or
groups to deal with individually). This is a neuro-linguistic programming
technique in which the person divides a big task or concept into several
smaller ones in order to better manage/handle it.
2. Begin separating or detaching from the items you’re not quite
ready to part with by storing them in an out-of-the-way place where you can get
to them if necessary but will take some effort to retrieve. Whenever you think
about or remember that you still have them, do a quick inventory of whether
these objects still have the same sentimental value or are you ready to release
this attachment so someone else can enjoy them. As Linda said, it’s okay to
hold onto these items and there should never be any pressure to absolutely
discard them; but the time may eventually come when it is and feels okay to say
goodbye and send them on their way with love.
3. Evaluate how much of this attachment to the garment is genuine
(sentimental value) or habit. For example, I have owned (but rarely worn) an
old Cricket sweater since 1989. Do I hold onto it because I still hold fond
memories of the year I bought it? It is more likely that I have kept the
sweater because I’m not sure what to do with it and I’m just a little bit
afraid that I might miss it when it’s gone. That anxiety goes right back to Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D.’s Theory of Mind: The
subconscious mind is afraid of what it doesn’t know. I have actually owned that
Cricket sweater more than half of my life, but the perceived pain isn’t
separating from a beloved item of clothes (which I haven’t worn since I bought
it). No, the anxiety and discomfort comes from the idea of not having it anymore.
I hope this information and tips are helpful to you as you embark on
your own Spring-cleaning/donation rituals. It certainly helped me to write this
blog: the decision is made and sweater is staying. At least until next year.
Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified
hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors
from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about
Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.
© 2016
