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| Diagram courtesy of Microsoft Bing |
In
life, there are often several routes we can take to reach the same destination
or techniques we can use to achieve the same goal. I find it interesting that
once we have chosen a specific path or method, we are very reluctant to try the
alternative.
A couple weeks ago, I suggested to my dad that he drive to my nephew’s school Christmas pageant the same way I go to see my horse. I knew that this route would enable him to avoid both the round-about on the freeway exit and having to make a left-hand turn into the school parking lot. To my surprise, he was very resistant about going the way I suggested. To my surprise, it turned out he had never driven that way to the school, which accounted for his initial protest about taking this unfamiliar route. I had to admit that I felt a pang of sympathy for him. Even though it was known and comfortable for me because I almost always drive the route I was encouraging him to take, once upon a time, I felt the exact same way about it. Maybe one day it will become this familiar and comfortable for my dad, as well.
Several
years ago, I used to always go to the barn the same way my dad wanted to drive
to the school. I was aware that a simpler, more direct route existed; there was
even an alternative that avoided the freeways altogether. However, since I had
never gone either way I was wary about going any way other than the way I was
used to. It was so familiar that I barely had to think about when to turn or
where. It was comfortable and known,
a subconscious mental script that I (almost) could have driven to the barn with
my eyes closed. It didn’t matter that I had a GPS in my car and several local
maps I could use if I took a wrong turn. It didn’t matter that I had lived in
the area for most of my life and, theoretically, already knew—or should have
known—how to at least find my way home if I got lost. I had no reason or desire
to change this habit, so I didn’t—until “my” freeway ramp was closed for
landscaping and I had no choice but to take the path unknown.
I
plugged the alternate route into my GPS, took a deep breath and started to
drive according to the GPS Voice’s instructions. So what if I had to get on the freeway a few exits over from my usual
starting point? I asked myself as I merged into traffic. I soon realized
that I had been worried for no reason when I started to recognize familiar road
signs and landmarks that reassured me I really was going the right way. I even discovered that this new route even
had some perks: I had to make fewer left-hand turns and fewer lane-changes, and
my overall drive time was actually a little shorter. Best of all, I didn’t have
to deal with that round-about where I usually exited the freeway. After driving
this way a few times, I became so comfortable and confident taking this new
route that it became a new mental script but even my preferred way to drive out to this part of the city.
Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in
Southern California. She graduated with honors from the
Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about
Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.
© 2014
