Slow Down to Speed Up!

 To minimize risk of exposure to and spread of the COVID-19 virus and COVID-19 variants, I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. Meanwhile, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

(This blog was originally posted on September 28, 2014)

Image courtesy of Microsoft/Bing

 

 

Have you ever noticed how it takes twice as long to complete a task when you rush to get it done? Whether it is finishing a homework assignment or a big project for work, somehow something goes wrong at the last, worst possible moment and totally messes up your projected deadline. What if you could avoid all that hassle in the first place and meet your deadline with time to spare?

The Automobile Association of America has a great television advertisement that perfectly illustrated this point. In it, someone in a flashy car speeds past another vehicle. At first, it seems like the driver in the second car gets ahead, but then he is stopped at an intersection with the driver in the original car waiting for the light to change. This pattern is repeated the same way several more times until the message becomes clear: driving fast and recklessly doesn’t get anyone ahead; in fact, it may cause more inconvenience (and waste more gas) than the apparent rush is worth. Similarly, in an episode of the police drama, Rookie Blue, one of the characters reminded an officer he had trained why he once insisted she take a sip of coffee or a bite of her sandwich before getting out of the squad car. Sergeant Shaw wanted her to take those extra couple of seconds so the other officer could mentally prepare herself for dealing with regardless of the situation she would be facing outside. The crime scene would still be there, he explained, but the officer needed to calm down and plan what she needed to do to apprehend the suspect or else risk getting seriously hurt or even killed making the arrest.

Often, when we are under pressure to complete a task, we rush through or even skip important steps so we can get the job out of the way and move onto other more interesting or “fun” things. Monty Roberts, an award-winning horse trainer and author, often advises: “Give yourself fifteen minutes and it will take an hour; give yourself an hour and it will take fifteen minutes.” In other words, when we work carefully and conscientiously—focusing only on the task at hand—we are in a better position to get the job done quickly and usually on the first try. However, when we rush through the job to meet a self-imposed or official deadline we are more likely to neglect important steps to complete the task which may ultimately undermine it.

An unintentional byproduct of rushing to complete a task is that we can put ourselves into hypnosis. Consider John G. Kappas, Ph.D.’s definition of hypnosis: “Hypnosis is created by an overload of message units, disorganizing our inhibitory process (Critical Mind), triggering our fight-flight mechanism and ultimately resulting in a hyper-suggestible state, providing access to the subconscious mind.” When we rush around trying to meet a deadline, our minds are already whirling practically out of control as we consider what we need to get done and if/how many steps we can get away with “leaving out.” Even if we do not intend to take a short-cut to finish the task, in this naturally induced hypnotic state we may neglect an important step because our subconscious (not conscious) mind has taken over the behavior. We have literally “escaped” into hypnosis to avoid the anxiety and stress we feel trying to complete that project.

    Unfortunately, the stress we consciously and subconsciously tried so hard to reduce or avoid is likely to reappear, and be even more intense, when we rush to just “get it done.” When we take those extra few seconds or even an entire hour, at the end of the day the fastest way to accomplish a goal is to slow down.

 

Special Offer: Discount on the First Hypnotherapy Session for Active/Retired

 Military Personnel & First Responders

Special Offer: 25 percent discount (that is $50!) off the first hypnotherapy session for all active/retired military personnel and first responders (police, fire-fighters, EMT/paramedics, ambulance personnel, emergency dispatchers, ER physicians and nurses, COVID-19 Ward staff).

This offer may not be combined with any other discount or discount package. It is not redeemable for cash.

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, three years in a row (July 2019, September 2020, July 2021). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2021

When Physical Problems Show up in Your Handwriting

To minimize risk of exposure to and spread of the COVID-19 virus and COVID-19 variants, I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. Meanwhile, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

(This blog was originally posted on May 2, 2017)

 

Photo courtesy of Microsoft

 

 

Handwriting reveals a lot about a person’s behavioral tendencies and attitudes, including propensity for stubbornness or over-analysis, levels of self-esteem and self-confidence, empathy and extroversion/introversion (see my blog titled All About Emotional and Physical Sexuality, Part 1). It can also reveal if the writer is experiencing any physical or emotional issues. When a stick-figure “body” is drawn over a letter, the body-part that is affected will show up as a weak (faint) or wriggling stroke or line in the corresponding area of the letter. For example, when my former editor had appendicitis, the lower-right quadrant of all of the oval letters in his writing—o, a, b, g, p—were faint or had a tiny gap, until after his surgery and he was healed.  A potential problem may also be reflected if the corresponding area of the letter is very thick and/or has a trailing line (end-stroke).

In accordance with the California Business and Professions Code 2908, if a client mentions a symptom or behavior that is out of my scope of expertise as a certified clinical hypnotherapist, I always refer the person to a licensed medical or mental health professional for further evaluation. I do not use handwriting analysis to diagnose medical or mental-health issues and always defer to the expertise of the professionals in those fields to provide diagnostic and continuing care.

That being said, following are some examples of how a physiological or psychological issue may be revealed in a handwriting sample:

•         If the person has a problem with the feet or legs, the writing will show a break (gap) in the stem or at the bottom of a loop. Weakness in the upper or lower torso will be reflected in a corresponding break in the upper- or lower-middle part of the loop, etc.
•        Affecting words or symptoms of a specific disease, such as cancer or arthritis, will be written at a downward angle (baseline slant). This indicates that the person is trying to get rid of an illness or condition. Negativity and pessimism are also manifested in downward-angle writing.
•        The tendency to squeeze letters in a word close together, presence of a check-mark (√) at the base of the stem and has a weak/faint “i” in the writing suggests that person is holding back sexually.
•        Emotional/Psychological problems are revealed in openings (gaps) at the bottom of a letter—especially an “o” and an “a”—which indicate incongruent behavior.

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Special offer

To thank the community for naming me the Best Hypnotherapist in the Santa Clarita Valley for 2021, I am offering a 10-percent discount on all single, a la carte hypnotherapy sessions. The discount is not eligible for the two-hour introductory session. This offer is valid through September 30, 2021 and may not be combined with any other promotion or exchanged for cash.

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, three years in a row (July 2019, September 2020, July 2021). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2021

 

Emotional and Physical Sexual Personality: Examples in Popular Songs

 

To minimize risk of exposure to and spread of the COVID-19 virus and COVID-19 variants, I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. Meanwhile, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

(This blog was originally posted on May 1, 2018)

Photo by Rick Hustead

 

 

The cornerstone of Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D.’s hypnotherapy practice is his concept of Emotional and Physical Sexuality.  In my blog titled, All About Emotional and Physical Sexuality, Part 1, I described the characteristics of these personalities and the importance of knowing a client’s sexual personality as a way to understand, predict and even mold his or her behavior. I provided more information about each personality—in particular, their priorities and goals in the context of a romantic (sexual) relationship—in the follow-up blog titled All About Emotional and Physical Sexuality, Part 2. In today’s blog I will present relationship perspectives in three songs (“scenarios”) that may give you a lyrical insight about how Emotional Sexuals and Physical Sexuals might behave at the end of a relationship.

·        “Buy Me a Rose,” by Kenny Rogers. In this song, Kenny Rogers represents the Emotional Sexual partner in a relationship. Remember, an Emotional Sexual generally does not feel comfortable expressing his feelings for a lover or spouse (the same is true for Emotional Sexual women). Consistent with this personality, he shows the love he feels for his wife by working hard to provide a good home and lifestyle for her. Since an Emotional Sexual’s core values are financial security/work; hobbies; friends and family; and the relationship, in his mind the relationship is going great because he is providing for her so well. However, since he does not verbalize his emotions or even show affection by calling her from work to say hello/I love you, or even bring her flowers from time to time, their marriage is not really so great.

·        “Wrecking Ball,” by Miley Cyrus. Sung from the post-breakup perspective, the lyrics describe a post-mortem of all the extreme and excessive clinging behaviors with which a Physical Sexual overwhelms and often alienates her Emotional Sexual lover.  For example, when Cyrus describes how she “came in like a wrecking ball”—full of emotion and demanding attempts to get closer to her partner—you can almost imagine a hurricane-force ball of energy hurling at you. Meanwhile, the other partner keeps pulling away from her until she is burning with rejection. The heart-breaking line in the bridge of the song is when she concedes, “Instead of using force/I guess I should have let you in.” If she had taken a step (or several) back and given him some space—the metaphoric “Twinkie”—the relationship might not have imploded. (Although this song is sung by a woman/her perspective, it is also applicable to a Physical Sexual man in a similar situation.)

·        “Just Give me a Reason,” by Pink featuring Nate Ruess. For me, this song represents the dynamics and communication (or miscommunication) between Physical Sexual and Emotional Sexual partners as their relationship starts to unravel. The lyrics trace the trajectory of their early attraction in the romance to a plateau stage in the relationship, where the passion and urgency of new love has worn off. The Physical Sexual female notices that her partner is talking in his sleep and no longer seems as attentive or interested in her compared to what is going on in his life. Meanwhile, the Emotional Sexual male is confused about her insecurity about their relationship: “Your head is running wild again/my dear we still have everythin’.” As the title of this song suggests, the outlook for this couple seems bright, though, because both partners want to work through their insecurities and misunderstandings to save the relationship.

Although the three songs I have chosen for this essay seem to emphasize stereotypical male/female roles, it is important to note that Dr. Kappas’s theory of Emotional and Physical Sexuality is not based on male/female behaviors. A man can be a Physical Sexual and a woman can be an Emotional Sexual. For example, in her hit “Ex’s and Oh’s,” singer Elle King is the Emotional Sexual partner whose (Physical Sexual) lovers are pining and cursing her name after she ends the relationship.

 This is also a sliding scale, so no one will be 100 percent Emotional Sexual or 100 percent Physical Sexual. Rather, we each possess characteristics of both personalities but tend to be more “dominant” in one or the other category.

For fun, consider the lyrics of your favorite relationship song in the context of Emotional and Physical Sexual personality. You may find an entirely new perspective or understanding of the song.

 

 

 

Special offer

To thank the community for naming me the Best Hypnotherapist in the Santa Clarita Valley for 2021, I am offering a 10-percent discount on all single, a la carte hypnotherapy sessions. The discount is not eligible for the two-hour introductory session. This offer is valid through September 30, 2021 and may not be combined with any other promotion or exchanged for cash.

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, three years in a row (July 2019, September 2020, July 2021). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2021

 

A Great Honor, for the Third Time!

 

To minimize risk of exposure to and spread of the COVID-19 virus and COVID-19 variants, I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. Meanwhile, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

 

About Calminsense Hypnotherapy ®

By Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht.

 

 

 

My “Thank You, Santa Clarita” ad, which appeared
in the 2021 Best of Santa Clarita publication of The Signal

 

 

 

Thank you so much, Santa Clarita, for voting me the Best Hypnotherapist in this community for the third year in a row! I am so touched and honored by this tribute.

I have been working as a Certified Hypnotherapist and Master in Therapeutic Guided Imagery in the Santa Clarita Valley since I graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute, the first nationally accredited college of hypnotherapy, in 2005. I use a combination of hypnosis and therapeutic-guided imagery techniques to help my clients achieve a variety of vocational and avocational self-improvement goals. All therapy is conducted in a safe, comfortable environment, and I follow the standards for complete confidentiality as outlined in the ethical guidelines of the American Counseling Association for the conduct of counseling therapists are observed at all times. Please note that some specialty hypnotherapy goals require a referral from a licensed medical and/or mental-health professional for me to work with you.

At birth, the mind is essentially a blank slate.  A newborn’s subconscious mind is hard-wired with only two reactions:  fear of loud noises and fear of falling. Everything other belief, behavior and habit is learned, especially during the first eight years or so of your life. Even as you grow up and continue to learn and experience new things, these early lessons and associations help to create a subconscious mental script. That script is stored in the subconscious mind and used as a reference for everything you do from that moment on. The fantastic news is that you can replace or change the beliefs, behaviors and habits that no longer work for you, with hypnotherapy. You just need to decide to make that change. I can help.

Hypnosis has been used as a therapeutic tool for centuries. It is not a vehicle of remote mind-control.  During hypnosis, your body is very comfortable and completely relaxed.  You are conscious, alert and very aware of what is going on around you, perhaps more so than during your normal “waking” state.  You will hear and be able to respond to everything.  You cannot and will not be made to say or do anything that conflict with your personal, ethical standards and desires.

For more information about hypnotherapy, visit my website: www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com. To make an appointment with me, call or text (661) 433-9430 or send e-mail to calminsensehypnosis@yahoo.com.

 

Special offer

To thank the community for this award, I am offering a 10-percent discount on all single, a la carte hypnotherapy sessions. The discount is not eligible for the two-hour introductory session. This offer is valid through September 30, 2021 and may not be combined with any other promotion or exchanged for cash. 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, three years in a row (July 2019, September 2020, July 2021). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2021

 

Default to the Known

To minimize risk of exposure to and spread of the COVID-19 virus and COVID-19 variants, I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. Meanwhile, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

 

“I fear not the man who has practiced 10,000 kicks once, but I fear the man who has

practiced one kick 10,000 times.” – Bruce Lee

 

 

(This blog was originally posted on May 2, 2017)

 

Photo by Rick Hustead

 

 

During my tenure as managing editor of Black Belt magazine, I became very familiar with this refrain/admonition: “You fight the way you train.” It didn’t matter that you have practiced your martial art for thirty years and have a tenth-degree black belt in that style. If your training and competitive expertise are in point-sparring versus contact fighting, chances are you will still be in trouble when it comes to defending yourself against someone who jumps you in an alley. The problem isn’t bad technique; you just defaulted to your subconscious “known,” your comfort zone. Over the years, your repeated training to pull your punches to not make actual contact with an opponent ultimately over-rode the natural instinct to connect a devastating punch or kick with the attacker’s body to defend yourself.

I keep this philosophy in mind when I help my hypnotherapy clients achieve their self-improvement goals by creating a new subconscious mental script to facilitate their desired behavior change. By the time they contact me for hypnotherapy, chances are they have been practicing that unwanted action or belief system for many years. No matter how many times they tell themselves they absolutely, positively do not want to smoke one more cigarette or eat another piece of sugary/fried food, this message is coming from the Logic/Will-Power/Decision-Making and Reasoning faculties based in the Conscious Mind. No matter how much you want to get rid of that negative habit, the Subconscious Mind will have a different perspective.

All those memories and positive associations (pleasure) with doing the “unwanted” behavior are stored in the Subconscious Mind, and the Critical Area of the mind, which is positioned in both the Conscious and Subconscious areas—is a great gate-keeper to prevent change in this status quo. For the Subconscious Mind, change—even desired change—equals pain, and it will fight very hard to prevent change from occurring. To our frustration, this usually means succumbing to temptation to smoke just one more cigarette or polish off your child’s left-over fries, and we go back to practicing those actions we want to stop once and for all.

The great thing about hypnosis is its effectiveness to overhaul or even delete those mental scripts that keep us in that loop of practicing unwanted habits. When you are in hypnosis, I can talk directly to your subconscious mind and, using your motivations, reasons and goals for the behavior change, rewrite that negative script to facilitate desired behavior changes. Once these new mental scripts are in your Subconscious Mind, resistance to making these changes melts away and are replaced by consistent repetition of new, healthy actions and belief systems to reinforce and achieve your self-improvement goals. With hypnosis, we can create a new “default” behavior and connect that metaphoric punch with the desired target: achieving your self-improvement goal!

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. In July 2019 and in September 2020 she was voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2021