To minimize risk of exposure to and spread of the COVID-19 virus and COVID-19 variants, I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. Meanwhile, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE!
(This blog was originally posted on May 1,
2018)
The cornerstone of Hypnosis Motivation
Institute founder John Kappas,
Ph.D.’s hypnotherapy practice is his concept of Emotional and Physical
Sexuality. In my blog titled, All
About Emotional and Physical Sexuality, Part 1, I described the
characteristics of these personalities and the importance of knowing a client’s
sexual personality as a way to understand, predict and even mold his or her
behavior. I provided more information about each personality—in particular, their
priorities and goals in the context of a romantic (sexual) relationship—in the
follow-up blog titled All
About Emotional and Physical Sexuality, Part 2. In today’s blog I will
present relationship perspectives in three songs (“scenarios”) that may give
you a lyrical insight about how Emotional Sexuals and Physical Sexuals might
behave at the end of a relationship.
·
“Buy
Me a Rose,” by Kenny Rogers. In
this song, Kenny Rogers represents the Emotional Sexual partner in a
relationship. Remember, an Emotional Sexual generally does not feel comfortable
expressing his feelings for a lover or spouse (the same is true for Emotional
Sexual women). Consistent with this personality, he shows the love he feels for
his wife by working hard to provide a good home and lifestyle for her. Since an
Emotional Sexual’s core values are financial security/work; hobbies; friends
and family; and the relationship, in his mind the relationship is going great
because he is providing for her so well. However, since he does not verbalize
his emotions or even show affection by calling her from work to say hello/I
love you, or even bring her flowers from time to time, their marriage is not
really so great.
·
“Wrecking
Ball,” by Miley Cyrus. Sung from the
post-breakup perspective, the lyrics describe a post-mortem of all the extreme
and excessive clinging behaviors with which a Physical Sexual overwhelms and
often alienates her Emotional Sexual lover. For example, when Cyrus describes how she
“came in like a wrecking ball”—full of emotion and demanding attempts to get
closer to her partner—you can almost imagine a hurricane-force ball of energy
hurling at you. Meanwhile, the other partner keeps pulling away from her until
she is burning with rejection. The heart-breaking line in the bridge of the
song is when she concedes, “Instead of using force/I guess I should have let
you in.” If she had taken a step (or several) back and given him some space—the
metaphoric “Twinkie”—the relationship might not have imploded. (Although this
song is sung by a woman/her perspective, it is also applicable to a Physical
Sexual man in a similar situation.)
·
“Just
Give me a Reason,” by Pink
featuring Nate Ruess. For me, this song represents the dynamics and
communication (or miscommunication) between Physical Sexual and Emotional
Sexual partners as their relationship starts to unravel. The lyrics trace the
trajectory of their early attraction in the romance to a plateau stage in the
relationship, where the passion and urgency of new love has worn off. The
Physical Sexual female notices that her partner is talking in his sleep and no
longer seems as attentive or interested in her compared to what is going on in
his life. Meanwhile, the Emotional Sexual male is confused about her insecurity
about their relationship: “Your head is running wild again/my dear we still
have everythin’.” As the title of this song suggests, the outlook for this
couple seems bright, though, because both partners want to work through their
insecurities and misunderstandings to save the relationship.
Although the three songs I have chosen for
this essay seem to emphasize stereotypical male/female roles, it is important
to note that Dr. Kappas’s theory of Emotional and Physical Sexuality is not based on male/female behaviors. A
man can be a Physical Sexual and a woman can be an Emotional Sexual. For
example, in her hit “Ex’s
and Oh’s,” singer Elle King is the
Emotional Sexual partner whose (Physical Sexual) lovers are pining and cursing
her name after she ends the relationship.
This
is also a sliding scale, so no one will be 100 percent Emotional Sexual or 100
percent Physical Sexual. Rather, we each possess characteristics of both
personalities but tend to be more “dominant” in one or the other category.
For fun, consider the lyrics of your favorite relationship song in the
context of Emotional and Physical Sexual personality. You may find an entirely
new perspective or understanding of the song.
Special offer
To thank the community for naming me the Best Hypnotherapist in the Santa
Clarita Valley for 2021, I am offering a 10-percent discount on all single, a
la carte hypnotherapy sessions. The discount is not eligible for the two-hour
introductory session. This offer is valid through September 30, 2021 and may
not be combined with any other promotion or exchanged for cash.
Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist
based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation
Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best
Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, three years in a row (July 2019,
September 2020, July 2021). For more information about Calminsense
Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.
© 2021
Hi, there. I am Tom Neil and I wish to describe how life had been for my younger brother living with schizophrenia and how he had been permanently able to overcome this debilitating disease via a naturopathic, herbal method.
ReplyDeleteMaicon - my kid brother was twenty years old when he was brought to the emergency room by the campus police of the college from which he had been suspended several months ago. A professor had called and reported that he had walked into his classroom, accused him of taking his tuition money, and refused to leave.
Although he had much academic success as a teenager, his behavior had become increasingly odd during the past year. He quit seeing his friends and no longer seemed to care about his appearance or social pursuits. He began wearing the same clothes each day and seldom bathed. He lived with several family members but rarely spoke to any of them. When he did talk to them, he said he had found clues that his college was just a front for an organized crime operation. He had been suspended from college because of missing many classes. My sister said that she had often seen him mumbling quietly to himself and at times he seemed to be talking to people who were not there. He would emerge from my room and ask my family to be quiet even when they were not making any noise.
My father and sister told the staff that Maicon's great-grandmother had had a serious illness and had lived for 30 years in a state hospital, which they believed was a mental hospital. Our mother left the family when Maicon was very young. She has been out of touch with us, and they thought she might have been treated for mental health problems.
Maicon agreed to sign himself into the psychiatric unit for treatment. The whole family except I had agreed to have Maicon transferred to a mental asylum. I knew inwardly there was still some plausible means by which my kid brother could overcome this condition. I knew botanical means of treatment will be more favorable than any other type of treatment, and as such, I had taken a keen interest in the research of naturopathic alternative measures suitable for the treatment of schizophrenia. I had pleaded for some little patience from the family in the delay of the transfer, I was looking forward to proving a point to the entire family, of a positive botanical remedy for this condition.
It was during my ceaseless search on the internet I had been fortunate enough to come across Dr. Utu Herbal Cure: an African herbalist and witch doctor whose professional works had majored on the eradication of certain viral conditions, especially schizophrenia, ( improving the memory capacity positively), via a traditional, naturopathic process and distinguished diet plan. It was by the administration of this herbal specialist that my brother had been able to improve his condition for better.
Before the naturopathic remedy - Maicon's story had reflected a common case, in which a high-functioning young adult goes through a major decline in day-to-day skills. Although family and friends may feel this is a loss of the person they knew, the illness can be treated and a good outcome is possible.
My brother Maicon is just like many other patients out there suffering from this disease. Although he was able to overcome this condition via a naturopathic herbal remedy administered by this African herbal physician and saved completely thus, rekindling the lost joy which had been experienced by the family members.
I wish to use this opportunity to reach across to anyone who may happen to be diagnosed with this disastrous condition to spread the hope of an everlasting herbal remedy that is capable of imposing a permanent end to this disease.
For more information concerning this naturopathic herbal remedy, feel free to contact this African herbal practitioner via email:
drutuherbalcure@gmail.com