My Professional Network Group

While I was training to become a certified hypnotherapist, the instructors at the Hypnosis Motivation Institute spent a lot of time teaching and coaching students how to promote and market their hypnotherapy practice. In addition to producing attractive business cards and informative brochures, the instructors also emphasized the importance of business networking to promote our hypnotherapy practices. They encouraged us to enroll in a local Chamber of Commerce, join one or more professional networking groups, practice on-line marketing/social media, perfect the 30-second “elevator speech” and do lectures about hypnosis every chance we got. Since membership with an organized professional group was required to graduate HMI “with honors”—a personal goal—I promptly joined a local professional marketing group: Network Referral Group of Santa Clarita. This organization is the focus of my blog this evening.

Formed in 2002, NRG is a medium-sized group that features a variety of small businesses in the Santa Clarita Valley, California. Many of the founding members—a probate attorney, a small-animal veterinary practice, a chiropractor, an accounting firm, and a personal loan consultant—are still in the group. Other members include a massage therapist, an insurance broker, an interior designer, the owner of a car-repair shop, a software developer/online marketer, a termite/pest exterminator, a real estate agent, a building contractor and a financial advisor. I have used the services of these members, and learn something about their business and what they do at our weekly lunch meetings.

Over the years, I have become much more comfortable promoting and marketing my business. I love being a hypnotherapist—it is the dream job I never knew I wanted—and I seize every opportunity to talk about what I do and how I do it. Belonging to NRG and having a chance to watch and learn these marketing skills from other professionals in the group have really helped to increase my confidence and comfort promoting my own business. In addition, my eyes have been opened as to how my work can complement and enhance the success of my NRG partners’ businesses.

What I value most about belonging to this group is the camaraderie, friendship and professional support that I receive from each of these members. Even though I had to resign from the group several years ago because of schedule conflicts, I knew that I would return to the group as soon as I could. Fortunately, my category (hypnotherapy) was still vacant and there were no other members in the group who might have had a professional conflict with what I do—NRG is category protected—I was welcomed back into the fold.

I count all of my NRG partners as friends; a few are very good friends and one is like a sister to me. I know that if I a pipe burst in my home, I could call Edwin Cruz and he would come over and make the repair for me. The day I (finally!) ever get a dog, Dr. Evelyn Vega will be my pup’s doctor. When I met Rob Stern ten years ago, I knew I would never have to worry about turning in my tax returns again. Dr. Brian is a fabulous chiropractor and the first person I contact if I come off my horse (rare) or strain my back picking Galahad’s hooves or moving hay. Linda Hammond has done a fabulous job refurbishing a table and chairs for us. Carla Jung gives a great massage, and Sherri Risley will turn over any rock to find the best insurance package for your budget. As for the members whose services I have not yet had a chance to use, I know from weekly testimonials about the quality of their work and customer service I and anyone who contracts them will be in good hands.

For more information about the Network Referral Group of Santa Clarita, and its members and businesses, please check out our website at, http://www.scvnrg.com.

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2016

Systems Theory and Weight Loss

Photo courtesy of Microsoft

According to Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D., the most important component of a successful weight-loss program is the hypnotherapy client’s active participation in the process. For example, the person must consistently, regularly write down in a ledger what he or she eats during the day—including the quantity of food ingested. To control eating behaviors, the client should be instructed to always leave 25 percent of the food on the plate.

As long as the person recording these details it is working—even if the weight is not coming off during a plateau stage. “This process is something you’re conscious that you’re going to do,” Dr. Kappas said. “You choose [to do or] not do the ledger.” If the person does not record this information in the ledger and/or does not control eating behaviors, he or she is not ready to do the process and lose weight, he explained. 

Another indication that the individual may not be ready to lose the weight is by not showing up for appointments. In this case, it is worthwhile to do a Systems Approach evaluation to find out if relationship or family pressures are inhibiting the weight loss. This may reveal that the client may be gaining weight to preserve the status quo of the marriage or relationship that he or she is already in. When one partner or family member loses weight, the status quo in that relationship naturally undergoes a shift in relation to the client’s perceptions about him- or herself. For example, the client’s spouse may feel subconsciously threatened by the partner’s physical change and concomitant increase in self-confidence, and fear that the client will leave the relationship. The partner’s subconscious goal would be to keep the current “system” in place. To do this the person may try to (again, subconsciously) sabotage the client’s diet by eating forbidden foods (e.g., sweets, pizza, etc.) in front of the person or even offering some to him or her. The spouse’s perception of the client and the “new” relationship is also likely to shift, and the client may even worry that the partner will leave. In an attempt to keep the relationship intact, the client may abandon the weight-loss program, Dr. Kappas explained.

Alternatively, the client may abandon the weight-loss program and gain, or regain, weight as a way to end the relationship with the spouse without feeling guilt. In this case, the client may use weight to “get back at” a partner who says he or she will only return to the relationship once the client loses the weight.

Another possibility is that the client may be trying to make him- or herself unattractive to the partner because there is no sexual activity between them. This is a form of emotional blackmail; in this case, the hypnotherapist must deal with the client in terms of just the weight and not the person’s relationship with the spouse.

Food may also fulfill (gratify) a need that the client has, which the partner is not meeting in the relationship. Finally, weight-gain is also often related to problems or hang-ups with sexuality, which also leads to low self-esteem, Dr. Kappas said.

Emotional issues cause 20-percent of weight problems, said the HMI founder. “Weight is a glue that holds together a style of emotions, and by removing that glue the emotions are likely to fall apart.” Therefore, in these cases, the client must be emotionally ready and motivated to resolve the problem in order to lose the weight.

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2016

Working with the Individual

My horse, Galahad (front) and his brother,

the Lipizzan stallion Favory Alisa II (Amadeus)

Photo by Sara Fogan

Earlier this afternoon one of my good friends described how and why she has slightly different training approaches for each of her three horses. One of them responds well to body language, vocal and clicker instructions. He is a “thinker,” she said, and he will work to figure out what she wants and complete his “task” before he gets his reward. The other two, she said, would crash into themselves and her to get a treat, so she must adjust how she asks and make sure they understand what is expected of them and when. This makes complete sense to me. 

Although my gelding, Avalon’s Galahad, receives the same training and handling as the other horses at the barn, he is definitely his “own horse.” Like them, he understands the aids for walking forward, stopping, transitioning up and down between gaits, backing up, standing still, etc. Like them, he also knows when I am on him and when our trainer is riding him, and what he can, cannot and will try to get away with depending who is on board. Galahad likes to really understand what he is being asked to do and why. If he thinks human error/confusion is going on, he tries his best to do what is being asked. If that still doesn’t make sense, he responds how he thinks the human up there on his back intended. To his credit, he understands the subconscious intent of his rider in terms of her body language. How she sits in the saddle or shifts her weight is one of the aids he correctly interpreted, based on his training. However, at that moment his rider’s conscious mind hadn’t caught up with her body (subconscious mind) and she didn’t actually ask for the movement she intended. So horse and rider try again: the rider asks the question more clearly and/or a little differently and checks how Galahad responds. Sometimes he is genuinely confused when he is learning a new movement; sometimes I give mixed signals when I ask for that transition down to a walk but my body keeps moving along with the rhythm of his very comfortable trot. He is probably thinking: What do you want, lady?

For example, before she ever put me on Galahad for a trial ride, my trainer had me ride her hunter (and Galahad’s brother) Ban. I knew the gelding understood what I was asking him to do, but he would not budge no matter how many clucks or squeezes I gave him. Ban knew his owner/trainer was not on him, and he was not going to move a hoof until she said to do so, at which point he became a (fairly) willing equine partner for an hour or so.

Granted, my horse is much more fluent speaking and understanding “Human” and body language than I am speaking Equus (horse). We share a mutual vocabulary in terms of the aids we use during ground-work and training in the saddle. Unlike his brother, Galahad is my horse; when I ask him to do something he will make a great effort to do answer my question as he understands it. We also enjoy a good rapport: mutual respect, trust, improving communication and to like and even enjoy each other’s company. I know and understand from working with my hypnotherapy clients that these factors are imperative to understanding their individual therapeutic goals, as is being able to effect the specific desired behavior changes through hypnosis. I believe the same is true when we are riding and interacting with horses. With good rapport and good communication skills, it is possible to have a great, mutually rewarding and even enlightening conversation.

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified  hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2016

Inspirational Thoughts for February 2, 2016

Photo by Sara Fogan

      Every now and then I like (and need) to take a few moments and remind myself about what is really important to me, in my life. If you follow me on my Calminsense Hypnotherapy Facebook page you may have seen some of these quotes before on this page, or will in the future. Many of these Quotes of the Day are beautiful examples and illustrations of the work I do as a hypnotherapist, so I will probably draw on them in future essays.

• “Strength doesn’t come from what you can do. It comes from overcoming the things you once thought you couldn’t.” – Rikki Rogers

• “Happiness can only exist in acceptance.” – George Orwell

• “Promote what you love instead of bashing what you hate.” – Unknown

• “You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading the last one.” – Unknown

• “It’s easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.” – Frederick Douglass

• “The relationships we have with others are largely determined by the relationship we have with ourselves.” – Lolly Daskal

• “Wanting to be someone else is a waste of who you are.” – Kurt Cobain

• “Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.” – Buddha

• “Happiness will come to you when it comes from you. Success will be yours when you take responsibility for making it so.” – Ralph Marston

• “As we grow up we realize it’s less important to have lots of friends and more important to have real ones.” – Amanda McRae

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2016