The Saddest Thing I Ever Heard

(This blog was originally posted on September 6, 2016)

Photo by Rick Hustead

Recently, I heard a news story that absolutely broke my heart. In August 2016, a four-year-old-girl was rescued from an abusive home in Hot Springs, Arkansas.¹ When police officers rescued her she reportedly told them that her name was “Idiot” because that’s what her mother’s boyfriend allegedly called her. Apparently, she was called that so often that she didn’t even know her real name.

According to John Kappas, Ph.D., the subconscious mind works on expectation and imagination. Over time, we learn to expect others to respond to and interact with us in a particular way based on our previous experience with those individuals. Eventually, this treatment becomes part of our subconscious mental script as we also learn to internalize the message or emotion we perceive in those interactions. All of this can and does affect self-confidence and self-esteem, the Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder explained. No matter what the “message” is, the more you hear and repeat it to yourself your subconscious mind starts to believe and even “own” that message. When everyone around you constantly bombards you with so much criticism and negativity, including referring to you as an idiot or some other derogatory slur, it’s no surprise that your self-confidence and self-esteem take a hit. It’s really only a matter of time until you start to believe in the negative hype, and when you are as young and impressionable as this child it takes even less time to create a negative mental script.

Now that this little girl has been found and her alleged abusers—her mother and her mother’s boyfriend—are in custody, she can start to heal from the psychological damage she endured as well as her physical injuries and emaciation. Hopefully the inner resources that helped her endure the negative treatment and messages she received during these early years will also help her to heal, thrive and find happiness, safety and security throughout the rest of her life.

1.        “Abused 4-Year-Old Child Tells Police Her Name Is ‘Idiot’: Mother, Boyfriend Charged After Abuse Reported” by Anneclaire Stapleton, CNN. http://www.clickorlando.com/news/national/abused-4yearold-child-tells-police-her-name-is-idiot

Special offer for Active/Retired First Responders and Military Personnel

 Special Offer: 25 percent discount off the first hypnotherapy session and 10 percent off subsequent sessions for all active/retired military personnel and first responders (police, fire-fighters, EMT/paramedics, ambulance personnel, emergency dispatchers, E.R. physicians/nurses).

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. In July 2019 she was voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2019

Correction, Not Perfection

(This blog was originally posted on October 17, 2016)

Photo by Rick Hustead

As with any behavior-modification program—which hypnotherapy is, by the way—clients typically come in with a list of all the things they believe are “wrong” with them. They can’t stay away from sweet or high-calorie/high-fat foods. They can’t give up cigarettes. They can’t get over the former spouse or lover and accept that the relationship is truly over. They don’t like to be or even feel safe when they are outside their comfort zone, an area that may not extend beyond the confines of their home. They “completely freak out” when they see a spider. And so on.

In addition to changing or abolishing the negative behavior, clients often want to know how it took hold in the first place. I couch this explanation in the context of John Kappas, Ph.D.’s model, Theory of Mind. Basically, the person learned to do “x” or adopted “y” belief by imitating, or modeling, these behaviors they observed in their social environment. A parent or guardian, peer or another role model explicitly or implicitly taught the individual to do it, and the person derived some kind of reward for doing it, too.

Another factor comes into play here, too: constant repetition of the behavior reinforces its strength and significance in the subconscious mind. There is a lot of truth to the expression, “Perfect practice makes perfect performance,” and this is especially true when it comes to reinforcing any behavior in the subconscious mind. Remember, the SCM does not know the difference between fantasy and reality, objective observation and a joke. So long as the behavior is giving the person some kind of positive feedback (pleasure), the individual will continue to do (practice) that activity. Furthermore, this practice is perfect, as far as the subconscious mind is concerned.

I help my hypnotherapy clients change unwanted behaviors or beliefs by rewriting the content of the subconscious mental script that previously reinforced those old patterns. Since everything we do and believe has been learned, these patterns can also be corrected and even un-learned when we decide they no longer work for us or serve our best interest. Then we can create a different, positive mental script and continue to reinforce the behaviors and attitudes that will help us accomplish our new self-improvement goals.

Special offer for Active/Retired First Responders and Military Personnel

 Special Offer: 25 percent discount off the first hypnotherapy session and 10 percent off subsequent sessions for all active/retired military personnel and first responders (police, fire-fighters, EMT/paramedics, ambulance personnel, emergency dispatchers, E.R. physicians/nurses).

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. In July 2019 she was voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2019

The Post-Hypnotic Suggestion

(This blog was originally posted on September 26, 2017)

Photo by Rick Hustead

When I work with my hypnotherapy clients, I give a lot of suggestions during the session. Some of those suggestions happen at the very beginning of hypnosis. For example, I will tell a Physical suggestible client: “You are allowing your eyes to close.” Or I might say to the Emotional Suggestible person, “Right about now you are noticing that your eyelids are feeling verrrrrrrry heavy.” The content of the suggestions I use to facilitate the client’s desired behavioral changes will depend on the person’s therapeutic/self-improvement goal and his or her suggestibility. I also include two specific post-hypnotic suggestions during the session.

The first is the post-suggestion to re-hypnosis. This is what enables the client to easily, comfortably re-enter the hypnotic state in future hypnotherapy sessions whenever a specific word/phrase or physical trigger occurs: the words “deep sleep” and me snapping my fingers or touching the client’s forehead. I include the phrase, “Each time deep sleep is suggested to you for the purposes of hypnosis, with your permission and only your permission” to ensure that this state will be induced only in the context of hypnotherapy. When I work with children/teens I make it clear during the cognitive (alert) and hypnosis portions of the session that only the hypnotherapist can induce the hypnotic sleep, not a parent or sibling, etc. Similarly, when I use hypnosis to help a pregnant woman and her birthing partner prepare for childbirth, I include a similar caveat. For example, the client will not be suggestible to doing anything that is not relevant to relaxation and aspects of the birth process.

The second post-hypnotic suggestion I use is called the post-suggestion to reaction. This is a specific suggestion that activates a desired behavior change when the client is no longer in hypnosis and has returned to an alert and aware state. For example, I might suggest to a client to wants to feel more relaxed and confident when speaking in public begins to notice a specific color that represents relaxation and calm everywhere around him, all over the environment. Furthermore, every time the person sees this color, he immediately feels completely confident, relaxed and in control of his response to every situation and can express himself and his ideas easily, comfortably and confidently.

Special offer for Active/Retired First Responders and Military Personnel

 Special Offer: 25 percent discount off the first hypnotherapy session for all active/retired military personnel and first responders (police, fire-fighters, EMT/paramedics, ambulance personnel, emergency dispatchers, E.R. physicians/nurses).

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. In July 2019 she was voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2019