Hypnosis and Suspension of Disbelief

(This blog was originally posted on March 7, 2017)

Photo by Rick Hustead

I remember when I first learned about “Suspension of Disbelief” during my second-period Honors English class in high school. At some very deep level I think I always understood that not all stories or action in movies made sense; this concept answered a lot of questions about why people, including me, are willing to buy into something that does not make sense. But we believe it—or at least go along with it—nonetheless.

 Suspension of Disbelief entails intentionally (or unintentionally) ignoring glaring conflicts or holes in logic in a movie or book to continue enjoying the story without interruption. It doesn’t seem to matter that a key concept in the plot could literally stop the story in its tracks if we think too much about why it doesn’t make any sense. If we are invested in the characters and/or the story, we may choose to ignore those pesky details that threaten to derail our enjoyment of the plot. Indeed, at this point it is easy to just turn off (ignore) the Critical Area of the subconscious mind that keeps pointing out those problems and settle back into the action on the page or screen. Does this sound familiar? Hint: It is possible and common to drift into a trance-like state (hypnosis) when we are caught up in a good book, movie/television program, sports event, etc.

For example, when I watched the Season Four finale of Sherlock, the plot was so convoluted and intricate that I wondered how the episode made it out of the editing booth. So much of it made no sense (to me, anyway), even when the mystery was solved and the clues explained. Probably my being such a fan of the new incarnation of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s iconic sleuth and his cohort played a big part in ignoring the questions running through my mind throughout the story. It was also fascinating to watch Sherlock Holmes get taken in and thrown off guard by what was going on around him. (I think he was hypnotized, to be honest.)

I had less patience for the lapses in logic that I noticed in the movies Poltergeist (1981) and Gravity (2013). To be honest, I was completely on-board with just about every suspenseful and creepy part of the film. The protagonists sliding across the linoleum kitchen floor, chairs stacking themselves into a pyramid on the kitchen table, being sucked into a television screen, even that attack by a murderous oak tree… None of those scenes fazed me. The film was basically ruined for me, though, when the Freeling family did not evacuate their home the second they got their little girl back. Who would stay in that house after having to retrieve your young child from a malevolent spirit—a spirit that had taken her to another dimension, at that? For the record, I didn’t buy the idea that a modern housing tract could or would be knowingly built over a cemetery without someone involved with the project blowing a very loud whistle about that. My interest in Gravity drifted right away when Sandra Bullock’s character was caught in a debris storm in which pieces of a destroyed space station whizzed by her at 30,000 miles an hour without sustaining any injuries. Logically, wouldn’t exposure to this type of catastrophe be fatal? I would have thought so, anyway.

The reason why some stories “work” for some people and not others has a lot to do with the viewer’s or reader’s willingness to suspend disbelief when necessary to move the plot along. The second something no longer makes sense or challenges an existing belief system, however, the magic is lost and the dreamlike state is broken. So long as the Critical Area of the subconscious mind is actively processing, questioning and discarding those message units, you are unlikely to fall for that theatrical magic. The instant it perceives this information as a threat to your existing Subconscious Mental Script or belief system(s), as the late actor, Bill Paxton, famously said, it’s “Game Over” and back to disbelieving reality you will go.

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2018

 

Consideration

(This blog was originally posted on March 6, 2017)

Photo by Rick Hustead

This afternoon I read a blog that really impacted me. In Subir Chowdhury’s essay titled The Power of a Glass of Water: Why Simple Acts of Thoughtfulness Matter Today, he considers the value of simple acts of consideration and the way such actions benefit other people at no cost to ourselves. At the beginning of the article, Mr. Chowdhury recounts an in incident in which passenger asked a flight attendant for a glass of water before takeoff. The flight attendant told him that snacks and beverages would not be served in the Economy section until the plane was airborne. (The fact that Mr. Chowdhury and other people in the Business- and First-Class sections of the het had already received complimentary alcoholic beverages and snacks while the jet was still on the tarmac was beside the point.) The gentleman who asked for a glass of water was a senior citizen; the cabin crew refused to bring him anything to drink even after repeated requests and explaining that he was very thirsty. Finally, another passenger sitting near the writer in the First-Class section stood up, went to the galley and brought the other man the water he needed. While the flight attendant who refused to do this herself seemed a bit put-out by this action, he observed that the older man was very appreciative of the other passenger’s thoughtful gesture.

It is very easy to be thoughtful and considerate of another person’s feelings. Many of us can still hear one or both parents reiterating the importance of observing the Golden Rule of reciprocity: “Do unto others as you would have done unto you.” In other words, if you don’t like being disrespected, teased, hit, etc., it is pretty likely that others do not like this kind of treatment, either. Similarly, when someone does something kind or thoughtful that benefits you, this action should (hopefully) inspire you to do something good for another person.

Simple acts of kindness and consideration are easy to do and generally make both parties feel good. Examples include helping someone reach an item on a high shelf at the grocery store, assisting a person on crutches to cross the street or lending a person the use of your mobile phone to call roadside assistance to get his keys out of the locked car. Parents whose teenage son or daughter recently got a driving license are probably familiar with this one: Call or send a text message when you get where you are going, and then when you are on your way home! A smile or a compliment can make someone’s day. Mailing the rent check to your landlord on time or helping to clean up after a mess—even if you didn’t make it—are such little things we can all do with very little effort, but they can all mean so much.

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2018

The Origins of Emotional and Physical Sexuality: A Caveat

(This blog was originally posted on March 1, 2017)

Photo by Rick Hustead

According to psychologist and hypnotherapist Dr. John Kappas, an individual develops his or her sexual personality by modeling these behaviors of the secondary caretaker, usually dad or another male role model. Indeed, once I know whether my client is an Emotional or Physical Sexual, I have a great picture of how the person’s parents interacted in their relationship. This model is so accurate that I can usually correctly identify who was the primary earner and who tended to make the first move toward reconciliation after an argument or fight. 

As I explained in a previous blog titled All About Emotional and Physical Sexuality, Part 1, sexual personality is modeled after the secondary caretaker (usually dad or another primary male role model) starting when you are around eight years old. If this person was focused on work and running the household you are likely to adopt these priorities in your life, as well. Conversely, if he spent more time focused on relationships and his hobbies, etc., these will probably become your priorities (core traits), too. However, there are a couple of instances in which this model does not apply.

• Identity of the secondary caretaker. Although mothers are typically the primary caretaker who assumes most of the day-to-day responsibility of raising a child, sometimes dad or another relative has this role. If the father has the primary-caretaker role, he will model suggestibility and mom (or the other adult) will model the sexual personality. This pattern is also applicable if the child has two moms or two dads, etc.

• Stage of your parents’ relationship. Emotional expression between partners tends to ebb and flow depending on where the couple is in their relationship. For example, during the honeymoon stage both individual are more affectionate and participate more in each other’s hobbies and family activities. A youngster perceives and processes these behaviors as a subconscious known and begins to model them. Conversely, if this role model is focused on earning an income or developing his career or business, the child is likely to develop similar priorities.

• Birth order. This category also reflects the stage of the parents’ relationship in that experience raising a child may make the parents more or less relaxed about being a parent during your upbringing. If you are the first child and were born very early in your parent’s relationship/marriage, the secondary caretaker may be more focused on securing the family’s financial stability. Younger children may have a different relationship with their parents who feel more relaxed and comfortable in their role after nurturing other kids. In this case, the way your parents communicated and interacted with you as a young child will also affect which traits and core values you integrate in your own behavior.

• No interaction with the secondary caregiver. Finally, little or no interaction with a secondary caretaker between ages eight to 14 years old, or a difficult relationship with that person, can result in modeling the primary caretaker’s sexual personality as well as suggestibility.

For more information about Emotional and Physical sexuality, I invite you to check out my other blogs titled:

·         All About Emotional and Physical Sexuality, Part 1

·         All About Emotional and Physical Sexuality, Part 2

·         All About Emotional and Physical Sexuality, Part 3

·         A Shorthand Guide to E & P Communication

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2018