Inner Wisdom

(This blog was originally posted on April 8, 2014)

 

 

                “Would you like to meet Sophia?”

                I opened my eyes and looked around the waiting room. I must have dozed off while I waited for my friend to finish her doctor’s appointment, because an older woman was suddenly standing directly in front of me, nodding and smiling. She had on pink scrubs and was holding the leash of one of the biggest Standard Poodles I had ever seen. I sat up straighter in the hard plastic chair and blinked a couple of times. I hadn’t slept well last night—okay, at all—and, I admit, the chance to catch a quick nap was a welcome respite. I had been very stressed and worried about my friend these past few weeks, and I almost resented this interruption. However, once I shrugged off my sleepy confusion and oriented myself in the room, my irritation melted away. I suddenly noticed the gentle, warm pressure of the dog’s chest and right shoulder leaning into my right shin. Sophia’s long, delicate chin rested on my knees and she looked up at me with soulful brown eyes.

The woman gave her dog a loving scratch behind the ears. Sophia pressed her right shoulder even closer against my leg and let out a soft sigh. “Go ahead and pet her if you like. Sophia is a therapy dog. She will stay with you as long as you like, or until you get up if you have to go.”

“No, I’m good.” I noticed that I was smiling as I leaned over to rub the dog’s shoulders, patting and stroking her the way I gently scratch my horse’s withers. The large waiting room had suddenly shrunk to the three or four feet of space that Sophia, her handler and I were occupying.  The tightness and tension in my shoulders bled away as I also released a slow, steady exhale. I could tell right away—from these physiological changes going on in my body and the sense of deep relaxation that I was feeling—that I had drifted into a light form of hypnosis. What was happening? How did this dog and her handler know how much I needed this encounter at that moment?

Animals’ intuition never fails to impress and astound me. Throughout my life, my cats always seem to know when I am sick. They stay close to me and curl up beside me on the sofa or in bed, feline versions of Florence Nightingale that are determined to keep a close eye on me until I recover. My horses—first, Geeves and now Galahad—always become very protective and even careful around me when I don’t feel well or if my confidence wavers during a ride. Similarly, when my mom and I met Monty Roberts at an Equine Affaire event many years ago, Mr. Roberts explained that his Mustang, Shy Boy, always sought out people in the audience who seemed to need a little special attention. Well, that little Mustang came right over to my mother and me. I definitely wanted and hoped he would come over to us; but my mom was especially excited and emotional about this encounter.

Today, I just had a sense that the dog was singling me out for this attention, because she was suddenly there in front of me, looking at me, nuzzling me. Since I had been sleeping when this pair entered the waiting room, I don’t know how many people they had already visited before they got to my corner against the wall. But once Sophia came over to me, she stayed in the same position pressed against my legs for at least 20 minutes. There were a few other patients sitting nearby, but I was the person the dog and her handler hung out with for so long. Even when other patients and their children came over to meet her, Sophia stayed close to me. I wasn’t even officially a patient today, but I definitely needed and appreciated the kind of gentle comfort that she was able to provide for me that morning.

 

                 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2015

 

Hypnotherapy for Pain Management

Photo courtesy of Microsoft/Bing

Hypnotherapy and therapeutic guided imagery are fabulous modalities to help manage pain. There are two categories of pain: acute, which is characterized by sudden onset (occurrence) and is the result of an event that has just happened. Conversely, chronic pain has been present for some period of time after a causative event (e.g., car crash), develops over time due to a causative factor (e.g., repetitive stress injury) or disease. Hypnosis and guided imagery are effective tools in the following ways:

·         They enable your subconscious mind to release from the physical sensations of chronic pain by changing the way your mind perceives pain by shutting off pain receptors during hypnosis. (e.g., breathing exercises, visualization);

·         They can help you learn to change your physical reactions to painful sensations associated with your chronic pain (e.g, “glove anesthesia”; “transfer of pain” to a more tolerable part of the body to facilitate more control; remodel pain sensations to a more acceptable/tolerable level);

·         They can help you reduce anxiety about experiencing pain by permitting the physical body to relax (release muscle tension) and the brain to release the body’s natural pain killers, serotonin and endorphins (e.g., “special place” imagery)

·         They can help you re-establish your perception of being able to control your pain through self-hypnosis (e.g.: “control room”; “imaginative transformation” of the context of the pain).

California law allows me to provide hypnotherapy as a complementary or alternative treatment to help you manage/control pain as a way to achieve vocational and avocational self-improvement goals (Business and Professions Code 2908). However, I must receive a referral from a licensed medical doctor or mental-health professional in order to work with you on this issue. I would also need a medical referral if your pain gets worse or your condition changes during the therapy, or if your wakes you from sleep.

For more information about this topic, I invite you to read my previous blog titled What You Can (and Cannot) Expect From Hypnotherapy.

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2015

Quoting Your Mother (Again)

 

Someone posted this Bern Williams quote on my Facebook wall recently: “Sooner or later we all quote our mothers.” Well, of course we do, I immediately thought. Let me tell you why this is true.

According to Hypnosis Motivation Founder John G. Kappas, Ph.D., we get our early suggestibility (how we communicate and learn) from how the primary caretaker (usually the mother) takes care of and interacts with us during early childhood (birth up to age 5). Words, tone of voice and body language create suggestibility, he explains. If your mom tended to communicate with you directly and literally—“You can play with your friends after you have finished your homework!”—and was consistent in enforcing this instruction, you likely followed her example with your own kids. Similarly, if she occasionally allowed you to play first you likely compensated for her inconsistency by trying to guess or infer what she really meant when she told you to do something.

Many of us remember (with fondness or even some consternation) various expressions, terms of endearment or even chastisement that our mother has said over and over throughout our lives. Every time she repeated this behavior, those words or phrases and the behavior(s) they accompanied were reinforced in our subconscious mind. Over time and with frequent repetition, these associations become so ingrained in our subconscious life script that we find ourselves responding to a similar situation the same way mom did or would have with your children.

And when your kids are grown they will be able to make a similar observation about their own interactions with their family, and so on.

 

 

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2015

 

Positive versus Negative Energy

 

It is easy to dwell on or even promote negativity and hatred. However, the positive energy that is expended to spread love, joy and positive vibes that encourage and support other people in our environment, spreads much faster and is far more powerful.

A couple weeks ago I heard a very sad news report about  a man in England who was fat-shamed on social media after someone posted a video of him dancing at a club. Viewers could literally see the effect of this negativity: in one frame, the man is shown smiling and seeming to have a great time getting his groove on. But in the next he is standing alone with his head down and shoulders slumped while everyone around him continues to dance and party. Whatever joy he had been experiencing moments before was seemingly been sucked right out of him when others made their criticism (loudly) known.

The video went “viral” throughout the Internet. However, when a very compassionate young woman in Southern California named Cassandra Fairbanks saw the video she turned the vitriol and negative energy that inspired the post onto its metaphoric head. She found out who the man was, organized a huge dance party for him and even started an online fundraiser to help raise money to pay for his plane ticket to attend the party as the guest of honor. As word spread about the party plans, hundreds of people (likely more, now) signed up to attend and donated more money to the fund. A couple celebrities reportedly volunteered to perform at it and expressed great excitement and enthusiasm about taking part in the upcoming event. How cool is that?

The optimistic, joyous resolution of this story—organizing a huge party to celebrate versus hurt and humiliate another person—demonstrates that it is possible to over-write the negativity in the environment by focusing on the positive energy surrounding you. For more information about this topic, check out my previous blogs: How to Deal With the Naysayer, Energy Vampires and Energy Exchange.

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2015

 

Thoughts of the Day

Photo by Sara Fogan

 

                Every now and then I like (and need) to take a few moments and remind myself about what is really important to me, in my life. If you follow me on Facebook you may have seen some of these quotes before on this page, or will in the future. Many of these Quotes of the Day are beautiful examples and illustrations of the work I do as a hypnotherapist, so I will probably draw on them in future essays.

 

“I am not what happened to me. I am what I choose to become.” – Pleasure P

“If you have passion and belief in yourself, anything’s possible.” – Criss Angel

“There are no secrets to success. It is the result of preparation, hard work and learning from failure.” –Colin Powell

"When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change." ~ Wayne W. Dyer

“The best use of imagination is creativity. The worst use of imagination is anxiety.” – Deepak Chopra

“There are no mistakes, no coincidences, all events are blessings given to us to learn from."- Elizabeth Kübler-Ross

"He who knows all the answers has not been asked all the questions." ~ Confucius

"And you? When will you begin that long journey into yourself?" Rumi

"The state of your life is nothing more than a reflection of the state of your mind." ~ Wayne W. Dyer

“Whatever you are not changing you are choosing.” – Laurie Buchanan

 

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2015

Don't Pack More Than You Can Carry

(This blog was originally posted on February 6, 2014)

 

 

 

Photo courtesy of Microsoft

 

 

As I have mentioned in my blog titled Dream Therapy, Part 1, it is very important to devote some time every day to relaxation and chilling out. Your conscious mind and physical body need down time the same way your subconscious mind needs REM sleep and dreams to process information and work through stress while you sleep. With a blast of summer-like weather hitting Southern California, many Los Angeles residents will likely head out to the beach to take advantage of the unseasonably warm weather. Others may opt to take a “staycation” and spend quality time at home with friends and family. And still others may choose to take the next few days to spend quality time alone, going to a health spa to meditate and recharge their emotional batteries.

While you prepare for the weekend, consider which items you absolutely need and want to bring with you and those you can (and should) leave behind. Plane/train/boat tickets, money and I.D., change(s) of clothes, toothbrush and toothpaste are obvious items you will need to bring along. If you plan to go water-skiing or surfing, you will probably also want to pack your sports gear for the trip, too. Just as there is limited carrying space in a suitcase, the trunk of your car and in the storage compartments of airplanes, trains and tour buses, I believe that there should also be limited room for the mental scripts that you bring to spend the weekend. “Necessary” items to include in this kind of subconscious mental script are: positive emotions and energy about the trip, optimism and alternative strategies or options if you must make an unexpected change of plan. What you do not need to bring on your trip are negative memories/associations with your travel destination and negative emotions (e.g., frustration, pessimism, etc.). If possible, you should leave your job at home, too.

If you have any anxiety about or negative associations with your vacation destination—for example, if you haven’t been in the ocean since you got caught in a rip current ten years ago—check out my suggestions for increasing self-confidence in my blog titled, When Self-Confidence Is on Thin Ice. I also provide a generic breathing and relaxation exercise in my blog titled, Breath Control: Here, I teach you an effective technique to replace negative associations with positive ones as you exhale and inhale your breath, respectively.

                I hope you have a wonderful and safe weekend, wherever you go and however you spend it.

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2015

Blocks and Opportunities

Photo courtesy of Microsoft/Bing

I recently came across the following quote from One Fit Widow, which a friend had pasted onto my Facebook page: “If it doesn’t open, it’s not your door.” How many times have experienced this philosophy? I wondered.

How many times have you experienced it?

One of my favorite lines in The Sound of Music is when Maria (Julie Andrews) says, “Wherever the Lord shuts a door somewhere He opens a window.” A more recent example comes from Katy Perry’s hit song, Firework: “Maybe your reason why all the doors are closed so you could open one that leads you to the perfect road.” Both are examples of such an optimistic, encouraging and hopeful philosophy that everything will work out in the end. I completely believe that it is true; however, there are often times in our lives when we have reason to seriously doubt that our desired outcome can or will ever be achieved. What do we do, then?

When I was applying to different universities to pursue my post-graduate degree, my academic advisor told me something very important: “If one of these colleges rejects your application, it might be because they are not a good fit for you.” I invite you to think about that concept for a moment. Her words echo the common break-up platitude, “It’s not you; it’s me.” But, why shouldn’t that be true? Over the years this insight has proved to be very sage counsel in various situations.

Whether we’re trying to land that dream job, be accepted to our first-choice college or join that super-cool group of kids at school, sometimes there isn’t a comfortable fit between all parties. Furthermore, no matter how hard we work to try and fit in with a certain group or organization, there may still be friction, frustration and disappointment. Too often, our first reaction/thought when something goes wrong in or with our conscious mind’s Great Plan is to blame ourselves for the perceived failure to achieve that very-important goal. We ask ourselves over and over again, “What did I do wrong? Why doesn’t he/she like me? What else can I do to fit in?” The situation quickly embodies that proverbial attempt to fit a square peg into a round hole.

The key to finding the perfect fit is to reframe the question—“Which one of those doors is mine to walk through?”—and be able to recognize it when that opportunity presents itself to you. Hypnotherapy and therapeutic guided imagery are great tools to help you let go of goals or situations that haven’t worked for you while becoming open to the right opportunities for you that are coming your way. During your sessions, I will teach you simple breathing and relaxation exercises that you can use to reduce stress and create a personalized hypnotic script to reinforce specific suggestions for creating opportunities to achieve your goal that are perfect for you. I will also provide a recording of your hypnosis session that you can listen to and reinforce the relaxation techniques and goal-actualization strategies that we worked on during your hypnotherapy session.

And as for being able to recognize the “right” door for you… Don’t worry: You will. Because when that relationship does work—when your first-choice (or even second- or third-choice) college sends you that long-awaited acceptance letter and enrollment packet, or you are offered that “dream job”—you will notice how easily everything falls into place. Suddenly all of the details surrounding your situation look and feels indescribably right from every angle. You find that your path forward is easy and opening up more opportunities to you. The best part of this journey is noticing how you can now look back at those days, weeks or even years of waiting for that golden opportunity with affection. You may even find that you appreciate the work, patience and frustration you experienced during that time of waiting and supposed “missed opportunities” because these are what enabled that proverbial window or door to open for you.

 

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2015