Quoting Your Mother (Again)

 

Someone posted this Bern Williams quote on my Facebook wall recently: “Sooner or later we all quote our mothers.” Well, of course we do, I immediately thought. Let me tell you why this is true.

According to Hypnosis Motivation Founder John G. Kappas, Ph.D., we get our early suggestibility (how we communicate and learn) from how the primary caretaker (usually the mother) takes care of and interacts with us during early childhood (birth up to age 5). Words, tone of voice and body language create suggestibility, he explains. If your mom tended to communicate with you directly and literally—“You can play with your friends after you have finished your homework!”—and was consistent in enforcing this instruction, you likely followed her example with your own kids. Similarly, if she occasionally allowed you to play first you likely compensated for her inconsistency by trying to guess or infer what she really meant when she told you to do something.

Many of us remember (with fondness or even some consternation) various expressions, terms of endearment or even chastisement that our mother has said over and over throughout our lives. Every time she repeated this behavior, those words or phrases and the behavior(s) they accompanied were reinforced in our subconscious mind. Over time and with frequent repetition, these associations become so ingrained in our subconscious life script that we find ourselves responding to a similar situation the same way mom did or would have with your children.

And when your kids are grown they will be able to make a similar observation about their own interactions with their family, and so on.

 

 

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2015