The Red Box

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

(This blog was originally posted on November 16, 2016)

Photo by Rick Hustead

 

 

Queen Victoria is known for many things. Until very recently, her reign was the longest of any British monarch. During that time there were considerable industrial and scientific advances, including growth of the railroad and building the London Underground, and development of Charles Darwin’s theory of evolutionary development. Her strong work ethic and public persona of prim behavior and proper etiquette became legendary. But when I think about this queen, what comes first to my mind is the Red Box.

The queen reportedly kept a red box on her desk in which urgent documents and communications were supposed to be placed until she could deal with the issue. As it turned out, less important papers such as generic requests for an audience (appointment) with the queen also found their way into that box. Of course, over time the box got very full. The monarch became frustrated and more than a little stressed out about all those things she had to “do.” Finally, her husband, Prince Albert of Saxe-Coburg and Gotha, looked inside the box and pointed out that a lot of the material inside didn’t belong there at all. Queen Victoria could lighten her workload by addressing only the most urgent matters and postponing or even delegating the rest to him and/or her ministers, secretaries, etc. to handle. Long story short, the queen took his advice and adopted a new and more efficient strategy for managing her monarchy.

Whether she vocally resisted (argued) adopting the new system or immediately accepted her husband’s suggestion to reorganize the contents of that box is probably unknown. However, it is likely that the queen initially found this task daunting and even annoying. Suddenly, she had to change a familiar, relatively simple behavior of putting documents in one place and take more time separating and classifying each item based on specific criteria. Once she got the hang of it this process would prove simpler and more efficient, but she would have to get used to it, first.

Call it what you will, but Queen Victoria’s new and even the intention of her original organizational system sounds an awful lot like the Neurolinguistic Programming technique of “chunking it down.”

If aspects of this tale sounds familiar in your own life that is the point I am trying to make. From time to time, a lot of us—including monarchs!—need help prioritizing assignments, jobs, projects and even relationships to be more efficient and productive in other areas of our lives. We are used to doing things a particular way, and every time we repeat that behavior (“way”) we reinforce it. However, it becomes easier to adopt a new process as we practice doing it for a while—i.e., incorporating these new actions (“knowns”) into the behavioral repertoire to create your new subconscious mental script. It is also easier to make a change when someone we respect or admire (hypno-modality) encourages/helps/teaches us what we need to do to implement the behavior/belief system, as Prince Albert did for his wife in this instance.

Special Offer:

Hypnotherapy to Release Weight

Hypnosis for weight loss series: $1,250 for 10-week series. (This is a $250 savings!) The $200 fee for the first session will be included in this rate only when the package is purchased up front. Book this package before June 30, 2023, to lock in this price as my rates will be going up on July 1, 2023.

*May not be combined with any other offer. Not redeemable for cash.

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023

 

Recipe for Success, Part 2

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

(This blog was originally posted on January 19, 2017)

Photo by Rick Hustead

 

 

People often come in for hypnotherapy to change or adopt a behavior that will help them achieve a specific goal or succeed at a particular endeavor. Contrary to popular belief (and the stories we tell ourselves), Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D. asserted that such success had nothing to do with intelligence, working hard, being nice or deserving, etc. Rather, success (or lack thereof) boiled down to the mental “programming” a person received and how that program was reinforced in daily life behaviors.

In Part 1 of this blog, I explained why subconscious resistance to changing those familiar—albeit unwanted—behaviors can keep us stuck there. In today’s blog I describe the Recipe for Success to help you stop the self-limiting script and help you achieve your self-improvement goals.

1.  Believe that you are 100% successful at what you want to achieve. Everything that happens to you is an expression of the subconscious signal you send to the universe. As you change the previous programming of this script by changing those old beliefs, the Universe will send you new opportunities.

2.  Daily Reinforcement. According to Dr. Kappas’s Theory of Mind, every one of your current beliefs and action reinforces what you learned from the time you were born until you were about eight years old. If you are battling homeostasis, you must battle it daily by practicing the new beliefs and behaviors you want to replace the old, obsolete ones.

3.  Ideomotor Response. Handwriting daily affirmations and goals/achievements in the Mental Bank Ledger is a great way to reinforce those new behaviors. (I teach my clients how the Mental Bank Concept helps to replace their obsolete subconscious mental script with one that will help them achieve new goals and provide their first ledger to get them started!)

4.  Symbolic Language. Dr. Kappas chose monetary and numeric symbols (e.g., the $) to represent success and growth because numbers are an important part of how the subconscious mind works.

5.  Hypnosis. The hypnotherapist facilitates a natural process that occurs at least twice each day during the “Magic 30 minutes” after waking up in the morning and just prior to drifting off to sleep at night. These periods of natural hypnosis are when a person is most suggestible to changing or adopting a new behavior/belief. (This is why you are encouraged to do the Mental Bank right before going to sleep at night.) Similarly, the hypnotic suggestions given during hypnotherapy also “ride the wave” into the subconscious mind to effect the desired change.

6.  Precognitive and Venting Dreams. The majority of change does not happen in the office during the hypnotherapy session. Rather, the hypnotherapist plants the seed for this change that grows over time, starting in sleep. For example, during hypnosis I drop in a hypnotic suggestion that my client will have a venting dream to release any attachment to the unwanted behaviors. Meanwhile, the person can gain insight and benefit from dreams that occurred during the precognitive stage of sleep about how to resolve any conflicts that have prevented achieving the desired goal.

Special Offer:

Hypnotherapy to Release Weight

Hypnosis for weight loss series: $1,250 for 10-week series. (This is a $250 savings!) The $200 fee for the first session will be included in this rate only when the package is purchased up front. Book this package before June 30, 2023, to lock in this price as my rates will be going up on July 1, 2023.

*May not be combined with any other offer. Not redeemable for cash.

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023

  

Recipe for Success, Part 1

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

(This blog was originally posted on January 18, 2017)

Photo by Rick Hustead

 

 

People often come in for hypnotherapy to change or adopt a behavior that will help them achieve a specific goal or succeed at a particular endeavor. Contrary to popular belief (and the stories we tell ourselves), Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D. asserted that such success had nothing to do with intelligence, working hard, being nice or deserving, etc. Rather, success (or lack thereof) boiled down to the mental “programming” a person received and how that program was reinforced in daily life (behaviors).

Dr. Kappas attributed the difficulty to change or re-program these behaviors to homeostasis, whereby a person tends to only go so high before hitting a metaphoric “ceiling” to this success. Silently, suddenly self-sabotaging behaviors start to happen to keep the individual stuck in the same (comfortable and familiar) life patterns he or she is trying to change or improve. It is easier and oftentimes more socially rewarding) to stay the same or resist change (see Systems Approach in Hypnotherapy). Fortunately, there is also a metaphoric “floor” to this resistance, at which time the person goes so low that he or she is motivated to make a positive change and break out of this negative or limited cycle.

In Part 2 of this blog, I will describe the Recipe for Success to help you stop the self-limiting script and help you achieve your self-improvement goals.

 

Special Offer:

Hypnotherapy to Release Weight

Hypnosis for weight loss series: $1,250 for 10-week series. (This is a $250 savings!) The $200 fee for the first session will be included in this rate only when the package is purchased up front. Book this package before June 30, 2023, to lock in this price as my rates will be going up on July 1, 2023.

*May not be combined with any other offer. Not redeemable for cash.

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023

Let It All Out

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

(This blog was originally posted on February 27, 2017)

 

Photo by Rick Hustead

 

 

In her song titled “I Just Wanna Cry,” Kristine Wriding describes a feeling we have probably all experienced at one time or another: the desire to just get in bed, crawl under the covers and have a good cry. I have no problem with that. In fact, from time to time it is very good to do just that.

As I explained in my blog titled Body Syndromes, pent-up emotions are transferred to another part of the body to be manifested later as a physical symptom when we do not express our emotions. However, when we give ourselves permission to cry when we are sad or shout/yell when we are angry, we can release those negative emotions and prevent carrying all that negative energy around.

Having said that, it is also important to let go of your conscious and subconscious attachment to whatever or whoever triggered that emotional release. If you continue to focus and dwell on a source of stress/anxiety you will only continue to experience the emotional/physiological discomfort. Rather than releasing this negativity, re-visiting the negative memory only strengthens the negative association. As John C. Maxwell observed, “A victim mind-set causes people to focus on what they cannot do instead of what they can do. It is a recipe for continued failure.”

Therefore, once you have expressed your feelings, give yourself permission to truly release any attachment to that negativity so you can continue to move forward in your life.

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023

 

How the Law of Attraction Can Work for You!

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

 

(This blog was originally posted on March 9, 2017)

 

 

 

Photo by Rick Hustead

 

 

“Before you can transform your wallet from poor to rich, you’ve
got to transform your spirit from poor to rich.” – Robert Kiyosaki

As I drove home from my weekly business luncheon with the Network Referral Group, I wondered when I could expect to hear from a marketing executive who had promised to contact me that afternoon. My phone rang less than a minute later; it was the call I had been waiting for. This was not a coincidence.

Less than an hour earlier, I had presented information about the Law of Attraction and how it works, for the other NRG members. The talk went very well and I was still basking in a state of optimism and confidence about how this information would help me and my colleagues attract more clients in the coming week.

Here are some highlights from my presentation which can help you achieve the business, romantic, etc., success you are trying to attract. This information is based on what I learned during a certification course I recently completed about this topic, taught by Joe Tabbanella, C.Ht. at the Hypnosis Motivation Institute.

 

• Visualize the outcome. How will you look/feel/behave with you have achieved your goal? Really get into the imagery about your desired result. Really see yourself experiencing and enjoying it and what it will mean for you. Remember: The subconscious mind does not know the difference between fantasy and reality, so this kind of imagery exercise will reinforce the experience of having what you want to attract, in your subconscious mind.
• Ask yourself: Why do you want “X”? How will actually obtaining this thing or person that you want to attract help you feel just as good as you do right now, in this visualization/imagery exercise about having attained it?
• Give yourself permission to have and enjoy this state of abundance and success. A lot of people reinforce and believe a subconscious mental script they learned at a very young age which discourages or even disparages success. It is important to believe that this old script is just a story you have told yourself, like a fairy tale; it is not written in stone. You can rewrite the ending by choosing to believe your power to create the positive outcome you want and deserve.
• Get yourself (subconscious mind) into a state of having and receiving what you want to attract. A caveat: If you focus more on something you want to avoid vs. what you really do want in your life, you will inadvertently attract the thing you do not want. So be positive and specific where you direct your intention!
• Structural Tension and Psychic Alignment: Structural tension occurs when, using visualization, your subconscious mind gets so into that state of receptivity—truly enjoying the experience of receiving your goal—that your physical body starts working to actualize it in real life. Psychic Alignment refers to the way in which the structural tension attracts this goal: The more you believe it and the more real its attainment is in your subconscious mind, the harder your conscious mind will work to make sure it happens. Once you feel so good, so energized, so excited in your belief that this success will be yours, the question that remains is when, not if, it will happen.
• It may take some time to realize your goal through this process. Sometimes it is fairly quick, such as my example of answering a phone call I had been waiting for right after I thought about the person I wanted to talk to. Other times, it can take days, weeks or even years to come true, with various diversions and setbacks along the way. I have wanted to be a therapist since I was eight years old, but it took almost 30 years, and a seven-year stint in magazine publishing before this happened. The idea of becoming a hypnotherapist never entered my mind until I met a representative from HMI in 204 who invited me to participate in a free, month-long course at the college. The rest, as they say, is history, and I love and am so excited about my vocation as a certified hypnotherapist.

 

 

For more information about this topic, I invite you to read my other blogs titled: The Power of Thinking; Intuition and the Law of Attraction, “Extra” Sensory Perception and the Law of Attraction; and Just What I Need When I Needed It. If you would like to start using principles of the Law of Attraction to in your life, call me at (661) 433-9430 and set up a hypnotherapy appointment today!

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023

 

How Hypnotherapy Can Alleviate Fear of Failure

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

(This blog was originally posted on February 22, 2016)

 

Photo by Rick Hustead

 

At some point during our lifetime, we will fail at something. Whether it’s a geometry test in high school, not waking up when the alarm goes off in the morning, a relationship doesn’t blossom the way we hoped, etc., failure of some kind is likely to touch us all. Despite the negative connotations and associations with this term, however, failing at something can actually be one of life’s greatest gifts because it usually presents an opportunity to try something else that suits us better. Dr. John Kappas, the founder of the Hypnosis Motivation Institute, used to advise his hypnotherapy students and clients to think or say “I like it!” even when the situation was unfavorable. Allowing ourselves to see the opportunity in perceived misfortune or inconvenience is a chance to look for and find that alternative path.

However, fear of failure is also a very real phenomenon that affects many, many people to the point of their becoming unwilling or even unable to pursue a goal or complete a task in case something goes wrong. Of course, consciously we know that not taking an action to realize that goal is another and more reliable way to guarantee failing at it. However, the subconscious mind is secretly relieved because this state of immobility is comfortable, familiar and “known.” Hypnotherapy can help you manage and overcome this fear to get back on track to pursue desired goals.

When I work with someone who has a fear of failure, one of the first things I want to do is help the client identify where and how this fear evolved. If the individual does not know or can’t remember its origin, I might suggest that the person will have a venting dream about the incident to analyze in a future hypnotherapy session. I would also desensitize the person to this fear and any stimuli that trigger this anxiety and replace the fear of failure with smiling or laughing, whenever he or she thinks about it.

Another effective strategy is to employ plenty of imagery/visualization exercises to prepare the client to get rid of this fear, and tie a stronger relaxation response to override the fear/anxiety. “You need to double-bind the client by substituting a positive suggestion for negative feelings or fear,” Dr. Kappas advised. For example, tie the client’s fear of success with the image of actually achieving that desired goal. If the person does not have any recent experiences or memories of achievement, I would work with him or her to choose and set small, achievable task to start this process. As the person continues to succeed at these projects, I would reinforce the association between relaxation and increasing confidence with achieving these new and increasingly challenging goals. Ultimately, eventually, the “fear of failure” will be replaced with a new subconscious known: enjoyment of success.

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023

 

Mourning the Ones We Loved, But Never Knew

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

(This blog was originally posted on January 14, 2016)

 

When someone dies, it is hard to say goodbye to a person we loved and a relationship we enjoyed. But, how to explain the intense and complicated feelings of loss and sadness when we never personally knew the person who has passed away and the relationship was (and could only ever be) one-sided?

It isn’t just that we continue to feel strong emotions about or bonds to the other person that makes this separation so difficult. Rather, per Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D.’s Theory of Mind, it is difficult to “leave” or let go of a relationship we have outgrown or has ended because we must give up a powerful known in our subconscious mind. Even when this relationship is one-sided, the attachment to the other person can still be very strong because the person represents a powerful part of that subconscious life script. We still invest a lot of emotion, fantasy/hope and expectations in it. Whether the relationship consists of binge-watching a favorite performer’s movies, following the star on a concert tour and trying to meet the individual “in-person”, the emotional attachment is very real. The emotional “high” we experience during those moments of real or virtual contact are also very powerful. Consequently, the longer we have followed this subconscious mental script, the more difficult it is to stop and let go even when the object of our affection or interest has passed away.

For years, people have flooded to Graceland to tour and take pictures of the estate that Elvis Presley, aka the King of Rock and Roll, once called home. There is usually at least one vigil there for him on his birthday, and the Elvis Presley-themed wedding is a popular attraction in Las Vegas. Some of my good friends remember how their mother pulled off the road to cry on the shoulder when Presley’s death was reported on the radio. To this day, they are all devoted fans of his music. I knew someone else who sobbed for three days when John Lennon was murdered in New York City and continued to feel sad about his loss twenty-plus years later.  

After Diana, Princess of Wales was killed in a car crash in Paris in 1997—nearly twenty-six years ago—it seemed like the entire world stopped to catch its breath. Suddenly the woman who had touched so many hearts and imaginations with her seemingly fairy-tale life was just gone, and her admirers felt the loss keenly. I remember standing in Hyde Park and watching the gun carriage bearing her coffin pass, with the sound of weeping all around. I saw at least mounted police officer wiped tears from her eyes, and a couple of people nearby called her name, half-sobbing, half-screaming in their grief. I doubt that many, if any, of the people standing with me to watch the funeral on the Jumbo-Tron screens set up in the park. That didn’t matter. They were mourning her as they might a dear friend. When I stopped by the gates of Kensington Park the following week to drop off a bouquet in the Princess’s memory, the floral arrangements and tributes extended almost to the curb and the overwhelming smell of fresh flowers and rotting foliage filled the air. Radio and television tributes to her seemed to air for weeks, and Elton John’s revised version of Candle in the Wind played on popular-music radio stations at least once an hour for about as long.

In January 2016, Rock ’n Roll icon, David Bowie, passed away after a battle with cancer. Ironically, just a day or two before he passed away I suddenly and inexplicably thought of his starring turn in the 1983 vampire film, The Hunger. Other than his song, Space Oddity, which is one of the most haunting, creepy and even saddest songs I have ever heard, I didn’t know much about him. As social-media outlets were flooded with tributes to the star, I had a chance to check out more of his music. Someone on Facebook shared a video of Bowie performing “Let’s Dance” with Tina Turner, and I wished fervently for a moment that I could have seen this performance in person. That man had a voice (and some impressive dance moves!). I regret sad that I didn’t appreciate his talent more during his lifetime.

Similar to the fans who are missing and mourning Bowie, I imagine my sadness learning about Alan Rickman’s death has more to do with what the actor—especially his roles—symbolized for me during various times during my life. I actually walked right past him in London many years ago. It was Christmastime, and Rickman was carrying several large bags in each hand. I remember he was very tall; by the time I registered who he was, the actor had walked past, his back already to me. I might not even have seen him at all if the person I was with at the time hadn’t elbowed me in the ribs and whispered, “There’s your man.” Looking back on that almost-close-encounter today, gives me goose-bumps. It was thrilling to know I had walked past one of my favorite actors.

Of all the characters Rickman had portrayed during his career, the role of “Jamie” in Truly, Madly, Deeply, affected me the most. It is still one of the only films that can still make me cry even after countless viewings. Watching Rickman teach on-screen love Juliet Stevenson to let go and say goodbye to him (his ghost) was and continues to be a symbolic lesson for me about coping with various kinds of grief and adapting to change. His films will live on, but the idea that the man in front of (and occasionally behind) the camera is no longer around makes me feel strangely adrift. It wasn’t like I personally knew him. I never crushed on him, although I know I am among Rickman’s many fans that could listen to his signature baritone voice with those precise inflections for hours.

It is not unusual to feel sadness and even experience grief following the death of someone who has played a significant role or influenced your life. It is not “wrong” to experience these emotions even if you have had minimal or no direct contact with this individual. Every time you danced to, sung along with or cried over one of Bowie’s songs, the emotional response that triggered this behavior was based on how his music resonated with your subconscious mental script. Your memories of those moments are now like snapshots or movies about what was going on in your life at that moment in time. Similarly, every time I laughed, cried or cringed watching one of Rickman’s movies, I responded according to how the scene represented something familiar (known) in my subconscious life script. I will never be able to watch his films again without feeling the bittersweet emotions attached to my memories about what I was doing, where I was and whom I was with, the first time I saw the movie.

For more information about the stages of grief and processing a significant emotional loss, I invite you to read my blogs titled Moving On, Part 1 and Moving On, Part 2.

 

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023