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Monday, September 14, 2020

Recreating the Family of Origin

In compliance with current WHO and CDC recommendations to minimize risk of exposure to and spread of the COVID-19 virus, I am temporarily suspending in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone and Skype/Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE!

(This blog was originally posted on May 19, 2016)

Photo by Rick Hustead

When I was a freshman at Occidental College, I noticed something very interesting: all of the students looked the same. Well, not exactly the same, as in identical; but our similarity in physical features and even social backgrounds struck me as uncanny. One of my favorite instructors reminded me of my mother, from her general physique and gentle demeanor to the curly, salt-and-pepper dark hair they wore in a similar style. Maybe that resemblance contributed to her being one of my favorite professors. I remember that my fourth-grade teacher reminded me of one of my grandmothers; Mrs. Payne also happened to be one of my favorite grammar-school teachers. I don’t think that was a coincidence. One of the first good friends I made at Goldsmiths College in London, during my junior year abroad reminded me of my sister; they both even shared the same major in English literature.

On Tuesday, May 17, 2016, KFI AM 640 radio host Gary Hoffman and his featured guest, Wendy Walsh, Ph.D., discussed people’s subconscious tendency to recreate the “home” or family environment/social schema where they work. Dr. Walsh’s description of this behavior sounded a lot like Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D.’s Theory of Mind. No matter where we are or who we are with, we subconsciously want to return to those early experiences where we felt comfortable—even if we were experiencing pain in that situation. Both models made total sense.

Many people spend a majority of their waking day at work or at school/college. Whether it is a youngster’s first day in kindergarten or the first time newly minted CEO walks into the boardroom to facilitate a meeting, anxiety (pain) is usually the dominant emotion experienced. To alleviate this discomfort, we subconsciously look for any similarity between what he or she knows/knows how to do and other people with whom we have shared this previous environment or space. I remember the anxiety I experienced when the original owner of Black Belt magazine sold the company in 2001. All of the staff was anxious about our job security, even the senior editors and art directors. We all knew that the new line manager could easily decide this was a chance to “refresh” the current business model and get new writers and editors. Would our possible replacements actually be more skilled at our job or just a better social “fit” for the new boss? As it turned out, most of us kept our job and even got promotions when Black Belt magazine’s current owners bought and expanded the company a few years later. However, it was easy to see that new writers and editors that were hired were much more “like” and compatible with the new executive staff.

When I interviewed for college and, later, future jobs, I subconsciously looked for an environment where I already felt comfortable and shared interests/goals as the people with whom I would be sharing that environment. I have no doubt that Oxy’s college-acceptance board and my prospective employers had similar criteria when they considered how well I would fit in with them. The same could also be said of how I was originally recruited to join NRG—the business-network group to which I belong—and even, to some extent, how my clients “choose” to work with me as their hypnotherapist. What is similar? What is familiar? That is where we ultimately go—and stay.

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This is a great opportunity to find out why hypnosis is so effective and how hypnotherapy can help you achieve your self-improvement goals. Call/send me a text message at (661) 433-9430 or send me an e-mail at calminsensehypnosis@yahoo.com to set up your free, 30-minute phone, Skype or Zoom consultation, today! (Limited to one consultation per person.)

Offer valid through September 30, 2020.

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. In July 2019 she was voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

Friday, September 11, 2020

The Day the World Changed

(This blog was originally posted on September 11, 2014)

Photo courtesy of Microsoft

September 11, 2001.

I remember where I was and exactly what I was doing when I first heard that a commercial airliner had crashed into the North Tower of the World Trade Center. Less than 20 minutes later, a second jetliner hit the South Tower. By the time a third jet barreled into the Pentagon and a fourth went down in a remote field in Pennsylvania, it was obvious that the United States was under attack and the world as we knew it would never be the same.

Gone are the days when we may walk our grandparents down the jet way and escort them right to the door of an airplane to wave goodbye when they go home after Thanksgiving. (We can’t even walk through airport security with our shoes still on.) Gone are the days when the only things we had to worry about when we traveled were weather delays or mechanical problems on the jet, coach or train we are traveling on. Oh, no: that is our old (now largely untenable) subconscious mental script. In the past 13 years, the bigger concern and occasional reality is whether the person seated beside us is carrying a concealed weapon such as a bomb or blade. Thirty years ago, hostages on a hijacked plane or ship could usually rely on eventually being released to survive their ordeal when the bad guy(s) were caught or left their human collateral behind in their escape. Since September 11, 2001 most people seem to know—believe?—that we may not escape such an attack with our lives.

Now, let’s turn that mind-set around. As a species, humans are very good at surviving, enduring and adapting to the physical and social environment in which we live. While I lived in England during the 1990s, everyone knew better than to ever leave bags, packages or luggage unattended anywhere, or else the police confiscate and destroy (blow up) the bag in case it was a bomb. Precaution, observation and adherence to the new security motto if you see something, say something have become our new subconscious known in the United States, too. We do not take our freedom or security so much for granted anymore, simply because we can’t afford to do so. Our metaphoric antennae are ever on alert, ready to raise the alarm if something doesn’t look, sound or seem right. By the time the passengers and crew aboard United Airlines Flight 93 realized their flight was doomed, they likely knew from phone calls to loved ones that they were heading toward a similar fate as what had already happened in New York City and Washington. Armed with the knowledge that they would not survive the hijacking no matter where the flight ended, they reportedly confronted and fought back against the terrorists. Their heroic actions not only saved thousands more lives by crashing the plane into a Pennsylvania field instead of the Capitol building but also created a new subconscious known for the rest of us: it is okay to fight back. Indeed, since we know and acutely remember that what happened thirteen years ago could happen again, we are more ready to jump right into the fray and prevent a fellow traveler from igniting explosives in his shoes or underwear. Even though we may grumble about the inconvenience, we submit to the extra interview, x-ray and pat-down at the security gates before boarding a plane or even entering a landmark building.

For me, our ability to endure even after those terrorist attacks proved that the capacity of our subconscious mind is a major key to humanity’s ability to survive extreme tragedy and bear almost unbearable loss. If not for the SCM’s ability to translate, store and retrieve those danger message units from the environment and anchor that perception to a fight/flight response, countless more people would likely have perished on and since September 11, 2001.

My thoughts and prayers are with the victims, their families and friends, and the first-responders who sacrificed and lost so much nineteen years ago today.

Limited-Time Offer: Free Phone, Skype or Zoom Consultation

Offer valid through September 30, 2020.

Thursday, September 10, 2020

Dehypnotizing the Already-Hypnotized Client

(This blog was originally posted on July 27, 2014)

Photo by Rick Hustead

Every now and then, someone seeking hypnotherapy comes in for the appointment already hypnotized. Hypnosis is a completely natural state which every one of us experiences for approximately 30 minutes, at least twice a day—just before drifting to sleep at night and right after waking up in the morning. As I have explained in previous blogs, we are also susceptible to experiencing a natural, environmentally-induced trance at other times of the day. (For more information about this topic, see: Have You Ever Been Hypnotized Before?; An Extreme Example of Environmental Hypnosis; and Hypnotized by the Grocery Store. And then there are instances in which we hypnotize ourselves. This is the state (and kind) of hypnosis I will address in this essay.

Psychologist and hypnotherapist John Kappas, Ph.D., observed that hypnosis occurs when an overload of message units disorganizes the inhibitory process, which triggers the fight/flight response to result in this hyper-suggestible state. Since we are more suggestible to ourselves than any other stimuli in our environment, we can get caught in a pattern of carrying beliefs or behaving in ways that do not work for us, but we continue to act that way because that is what we have always done. For example, someone who continues to accept work that is considerably below the individual’s skill and desired pay-grade may do this because the individual follows a subconscious mental script that says this is the best he or she can do. Now, despite expressing a desire to pursue a more lucrative career and possessing obvious skill to do that work, the person doesn’t even try to pursue a different career because he or she believes that original mental script.

To help an already-hypnotized client exit this state, Dr. Kappas advised deepening the person’s state even further and blocking his or her subconscious mind from accepting negative suggestions or influences from the environment. This must be done before proceeding with the regular hypnotherapy session to address the self-improvement goals that the client wants to actualize, the Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder said. If the client knows when, where and why these negative mental-scripts evolved, I will systematically desensitize the person to the environmental stimuli that trigger the undesired responses/behaviors.

However, if the client does not know how these negative mental scripts evolved, I do not employ age-regression therapy to explore and desensitize the origins of those negative beliefs. (For more information about this topic, see my blog titled “Age Regression…and why I Don’t Use This Technique. Rather, I use a technique called “rejection-proofing,” wherein I provide hypnotic suggestions to help increase the client’s overall self-acceptance, self-appreciation and self-approval. This process enables the individual to dismiss the negative self-talk (“chatter”) in the person’s subconscious mind and re-write a new mental script to reinforce the positive beliefs about his or her abilities to pursue those goals.

Finally, to increase the person’s ability to control entering the hypnotic state, I target the logical (left-brain) side of the client’s subconscious mind during this and subsequent hypnotherapy sessions. I also teach the person how to count out of hypnosis whenever the individual notices that he or she is naturally entering this state at home, work, driving or any other time.

Limited-Time Offer: Free Phone, Skype or Zoom Consultation

Offer valid through September 30, 2020.