Wednesday, March 8, 2017

Horse Ownership: It's an Honor and a Privilege



(This blog was originally posted on February 10, 2016)

 
Photo by Sara Fogan





Many years ago, I attended a case conference where Hypnosis Motivation Institute instructor Lisa Machenberg described how she helped someone to regard even the negative, inconvenient aspects of car ownership in terms of being a privilege. Apparently this individual was procrastinating about getting new tires for his car because not having a vehicle for one morning would be inconvenient and expensive. His justification for not doing anything to facilitate the repair was: “Hey, the car is still drive-able, so what is the rush?” 


Ms. Machenberg said the client eventually became motivated to get the tires changed when they explored the benefits—independence, convenience, the enjoyment of driving—and the potential consequences of not taking the car in. The greatest inspiration for him turned out to be the potential financial burden of having to pay for additional repairs to the body of his or another person’s car if a flat or blown-out tire caused a crash. At this point in the conversation, she said, they discussed how the benefits of car-ownership is as much a privilege as taking good care of the vehicle is a responsibility. This message became incorporated in the hypnotic script she created for his hypnotherapy. It also so resonated with me in terms of how I feel about owning a horse that I use it as a kind of mantra to keep persevering in my riding and how I take care of him, as well as to remind Galahad how much I love and appreciate him.


 As most equestrians (and even non-riders) know, riding and owning a horse is an expensive investment of time, money and emotion. Depending whom you ask, it can be a toss-up which one of these resources is most expensive at any one time. Despite their strength, size and speed, these animals are actually more fragile in some ways than they seem. For example, the extreme changes in summer-like temperatures we are experiencing in Southern California pose a greater risk of colic. (Who else has the barn veterinarian’s phone number on speed dial this week?) A training mishap can result in a pulled muscle, tendon or ligament for horse or rider. As the price of hay gets higher every season, finding a good deal on what we feed our equine partner also becomes more challenging and frustrating. After a heavy rain we must determine that the footing is good enough to turn the horse out to play or ride without risk of injuring the animal. Then there is the herculean effort it will take on our part to clean the gray gelding up after he enjoys rolling in the fresh mud that it looks like his original black coat has grown back. And so the list goes on.


By the time we’re done riding and have completed all the barn chores at the end of the day, all we want to do is get in a hot shower or bubble bath and wash the dirt and stress away. But, wait. The horse still needs to be properly cooled out, cleaned up and “tucked in” before we can do any of the other stuff. And that is what I mean by responsibility and privilege of owning a horse.


There is a common expression around most barns: If you don’t have time to groom, you don’t have time to ride. When I was a teen-ager, all I wanted to do was get on a horse and go, go, go; grooming afterward was not something I looked forward to and, in all honesty, I probable did a barely acceptable job. At that time, I didn’t have my own horse and there was always someone at the barn who would do the “dirty work” that students like me didn’t like or want to do. But my attitude did a complete 180-degree turn when I grew up and got a horse of my own.


I like to believe that the more time I spend grooming and hanging out with him or just watching him play with the other geldings in his herd, are opportunities where we do the most bonding. This is the time where the responsibility of horse-ownership truly is a privilege. Yes, riding is great and it is a lot of fun. The reward and pride I feel for both of us when we finally get those 20-meter circles round and circles is immense. But nothing is as wonderful, to me, as feeling my horse stretching his neck closer and into the curry comb while I massage the dust and dirt out of his coat afterward. 


There is nothing like the sound of his teeth crunching on a slice of apple or carrot when I reward him for working so hard for me during our lesson in the arena. There is nothing like hearing my trainer praise Galahad about his progress and improved skills after she finishes schooling him. There is nothing like how happy and proud I am when Galahad is able to calmly walk past barking dogs or that new donkey at a neighbor’s property during one of our neighborhood strolls. His calm demeanor at those moments are testament to his temperament as well as the time spent working to increase his self-confidence and trust in me when he feels challenged or threatened. There is nothing like the relief I feel when the veterinarian gives my horse a clean bill of health, or after Galahad’s hooves are trimmed or he has been wormed. And, yes, there is nothing like the satisfaction I feel each month when I pay for his board and training, or even when I pay dues to renew his insurance and breed memberships.


Like the client described at the beginning of this essay, horse ownership—like car ownership—is undoubtedly an incredible privilege. Horses bring so much joy, fun and pleasure to our lives that the time, physical effort and expense seem inconsequential. Knowing that one of these big (or small), powerful prey animals will cooperate, trust and even seem to seek our companionship is a wonderful honor to anyone who has an equine partner in his or her life. 







Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.
© 2017
 

Tuesday, March 7, 2017

Hypnosis and Suspension of Disbelief

Photo by Rick Hustead





I remember when I first learned about “Suspension of Disbelief” during my second-period Honors English class in high school. At some very deep level I think I always understood that not all stories or action in movies made sense; this concept answered a lot of questions about why people, including me, are willing to buy into something that does not make sense. But we believe it—or at least go along with it—nonetheless.

 Suspension of Disbelief entails intentionally (or unintentionally) ignoring glaring conflicts or holes in logic in a movie or book to continue enjoying the story without interruption. It doesn’t seem to matter that a key concept in the plot could literally stop the story in its tracks if we think too much about why it doesn’t make any sense. If we are invested in the characters and/or the story, we may choose to ignore those pesky details that threaten to derail our enjoyment of the plot. Indeed, at this point it is easy to just turn off (ignore) the Critical Area of the subconscious mind that keeps pointing out those problems and settle back into the action on the page or screen. Does this sound familiar? Hint: It is possible and common to drift into a trance-like state (hypnosis) when we are caught up in a good book, movie/television program, sports event, etc.

For example, when I watched the Season Four finale of Sherlock, the plot was so convoluted and intricate that I wondered how the episode made it out of the editing booth. So much of it made no sense (to me, anyway), even when the mystery was solved and the clues explained. Probably my being such a fan of the new incarnation of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s iconic sleuth and his cohort played a big part in ignoring the questions running through my mind throughout the story. It was also fascinating to watch Sherlock Holmes get taken in and thrown off guard by what was going on around him. (I think he was hypnotized, to be honest.)

I had less patience for the lapses in logic that I noticed in the movies Poltergeist (1981) and Gravity (2013). To be honest, I was completely on-board with just about every suspenseful and creepy part of the film. The protagonists sliding across the linoleum kitchen floor, chairs stacking themselves into a pyramid on the kitchen table, being sucked into a television screen, even that attack by a murderous oak tree… None of those scenes fazed me. The film was basically ruined for me, though, when the Freeling family did not evacuate their home the second they got their little girl back. Who would stay in that house after having to retrieve your young child from a malevolent spirit—a spirit that had taken her to another dimension, at that? For the record, I didn’t buy the idea that a modern housing tract could or would be knowingly built over a cemetery without someone involved with the project blowing a very loud whistle about that. My interest in Gravity drifted right away when Sandra Bullock’s character was caught in a debris storm in which pieces of a destroyed space station whizzed by her at 30,000 miles an hour without sustaining any injuries. Logically, wouldn’t exposure to this type of catastrophe be fatal? I would have thought so, anyway.

The reason why some stories “work” for some people and not others has a lot to do with the viewer’s or reader’s willingness to suspend disbelief when necessary to move the plot along. The second something no longer makes sense or challenges an existing belief system, however, the magic is lost and the dreamlike state is broken. So long as the Critical Area of the subconscious mind is actively processing, questioning and discarding those message units, you are unlikely to fall for that theatrical magic. The instant it perceives this information as a threat to your existing Subconscious Mental Script or belief system(s), as the late actor, Bill Paxton, famously said, it’s “Game Over” and back to disbelieving reality you will go.




Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.
© 2017

Monday, March 6, 2017

Consideration

Photo by Rick Hustead





This afternoon I read a blog that really impacted me. In Subir Chowdhury’s essay titled The Power of a Glass of Water: Why Simple Acts of Thoughtfulness Matter Today, he considers the value of simple acts of consideration and the way such actions benefit other people at no cost to ourselves. At the beginning of the article, Mr. Chowdhury recounts an in incident in which passenger asked a flight attendant for a glass of water before takeoff. The flight attendant told him that snacks and beverages would not be served in the Economy section until the plane was airborne. (The fact that Mr. Chowdhury and other people in the Business- and First-Class sections of the het had already received complimentary alcoholic beverages and snacks while the jet was still on the tarmac was beside the point.) The gentleman who asked for a glass of water was a senior citizen; the cabin crew refused to bring him anything to drink even after repeated requests and explaining that he was very thirsty. Finally, another passenger sitting near the writer in the First-Class section stood up, went to the galley and brought the other man the water he needed. While the flight attendant who refused to do this herself seemed a bit put-out by this action, he observed that the older man was very appreciative of the other passenger’s thoughtful gesture.

It is very easy to be thoughtful and considerate of another person’s feelings. Many of us can still hear one or both parents reiterating the importance of observing the Golden Rule of reciprocity: “Do unto others as you would have done unto you.” In other words, if you don’t like being disrespected, teased, hit, etc., it is pretty likely that others do not like this kind of treatment, either. Similarly, when someone does something kind or thoughtful that benefits you, this action should (hopefully) inspire you to do something good for another person.

Simple acts of kindness and consideration are easy to do and generally make both parties feel good. Examples include helping someone reach an item on a high shelf at the grocery store, assisting a person on crutches to cross the street or lending a person the use of your mobile phone to call roadside assistance to get his keys out of the locked car. Parents whose teenage son or daughter recently got a driving license are probably familiar with this one: Call or send a text message when you get where you are going, and then when you are on your way home! A smile or a compliment can make someone’s day. Mailing the rent check to your landlord on time or helping to clean up after a mess—even if you didn’t make it—are such little things we can all do with very little effort, but they can all mean so much.



Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.
© 2017

Friday, March 3, 2017

Thoughts of the Day

Photo by Sara Fogan






      Every now and then I like (and need) to take a few moments and remind myself about what is really important to me, in my life. If you follow me on my Calminsense Hypnotherapy Facebook page you may have seen some of these quotes before on this page, or will in the future. Many of these Quotes of the Day are beautiful examples and illustrations of the work I do as a hypnotherapist, so I will probably draw on them in future essays.


  • “If you want something in your life you’ve never had, you’ll have to do something you’ve never done.” – J.D. Houston

  • “A genuine relationship is one that is not dominated by the ego with its image-making and self-seeking.” – Eckhart  Tolle

  • “Example is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the only thing.” – Albert Schweitzer

  • “Failure is a detour, not a dead end street.” Zig Ziglar

  • “Humor is a rubber sword: it allows you to make a point without drawing blood.” – Mary Hirsch

  • “The highest courage is to dare to be yourself in the face of adversity.” Michael Moore

  • “If you don’t make time to work on creating the life you want, you’re eventually going to be forced to spend a lot of time dealing with a life you don’t want.” – Keving Ngo

  • “Impossible is not a fact. It’s an opinion.” Muhammad Ali

  • “You don’t fall on top of the mountaintop, you have to work to get there!” – Bruce Van Horn  

  • “Listen to the spaces between the words.” – Lolly Daskal




Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.
© 2017