Being Mindful

(This blog was originally posted on March 26, 2016)

Photo courtesy of Microsoft/Bing

One of the most beneficial lessons I have learned is to be more “mindful” of my environment and surroundings. The first time I heard about mindfulness was during my course through the Hypnosis Motivation Institute to become certified to use hypnosis to help people deal with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. I am working on this behavior again as I complete another HMI course on using hypnosis to help care-givers take better emotional and physical care of themselves as well as the person they are looking after. Basically, this concept entails slowing down our usual rush or frenetic, day-to-day behavior of existing and increasing our awareness of the immediate surroundings to slow down and reduce stress so we can live and enjoy life.

Following is an exercise you can practice while you take a bath or shower to increase your mindfulness and awareness of your own environment. The goal of this exercise is to help you focus on the positive, interesting and good things around you, to eventually draw in that goodness to replace any negativity you have been carrying inside.

·         Rate your level of relaxation on a scale from 0-10, with “0” being least relaxed and “10” being most relaxed.

·         Draw a long, slow breath through your nose and hold it for the count of four. Release the breath through your mouth. As you exhale, say or think the word, “calm” or “relax”. Continue breathing at your own relaxed rate. When you remember to do so, think or say the word “calm” or “relax” as you continue this Mindfulness exercise.

·         Step into the shower/bath. Focus your attention on the sensation of the water on your skin. What does the temperature like? How does it feel to have the water droplets falling on your skin (if a shower)? What is the sensation like as the water laps against your body (if a bath) as you position yourself to sit in the tub.

·         Notice the smell of the soap/bubble-bath/bath salts you are using. Is there a smell? What does it smell like, if anything at all? How does it feel (texture) when the soap/bubble-bath/bath salts touch your skin?

·         Now take a moment to allow the water from the shower splash over your hand, or to scoop up some bath water in your hands and allow it to spill through your fingers. Notice the shape of the water droplets. Can you see any colors in the water droplets or perhaps even in the bubbles from soap or bubble-bath? What are those colors? What are those shapes?

·         To conclude the exercise, rate your level of relaxation again, using the same 0-10 scale. What have you noticed during this exercise about your ability to relax and how it feels to be able to focus on something outside of yourself, this way?

This is just one example of how to practice Mindfulness. I use and teach Mindfulness to my hypnotherapy clients to help them relax and to help them reduce stress and anxiety, improve self-care and more. It is a great way to relax and practice noticing things going on around you that affect yet do not necessarily have anything to do with, directly affect, or are directly affected by you.

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2016

Forgiveness

(This blog was originally posted on September 15, 2014)

Photo courtesy of Microsoft

Have you ever got stuck in a blame-game with someone, refusing to accept some responsibility for your role in the situation or to accept the other person’s apology for hurting you? Do you ever hold onto the anger and emotional pain about something that occurred so long ago that you don’t even feel those emotions anymore but keep holding onto them because…you don’t even know why? Would you be willing to let go of all that negative energy if you knew this release would help you feel better, to be at peace and free you from the emotional baggage you have been dragging around?

I recently saw this quote from Inspirationboost.com, and it really resonated with me: “Forgive. Not because they deserve forgiveness, but because you deserve peace.”

At some point during our lifetime, someone hurts us. This injury may be physical or metaphoric, intentional or accidental, but long after the physical wounds have healed some emotional scars continue to feel raw. To assuage this pain and gain a sense of control over what happened, we may claim that the injury was justified or believe that we somehow brought it on ourselves. Indeed, it can be very difficult to see past this pain when someone you once cared about is hurling verbal and legal barbs your way during an acrimonious divorce or dissolution of a business or social relationship. You may even resent and even guilt/shame for having ever trusted him or her with your heart (and your finances).

The problem with holding onto these negative emotions is you are the one who continues to suffer emotional pain long after the relationship is ended and you and the other person have parted ways for good. Whenever you dwell on the negative events that happened during the relationship and the sadness or anger that you felt at the time, you reinforce the strength and the habit of feeling (and feeding) those negative emotions. This continued bombardment of thoughts, memories and negative associations with the past relationship overloads the conscious mind, triggering the fight/flight mechanism and putting you in an even more hyper-suggestible state (hypnosis). Since we are most suggestible to ourselves, every time we repeat a thought or behavior you reinforce its strength and power in your subconscious mind. In other words, you are hypnotizing yourself to perpetuate this unwanted behavior. Ultimately, the most effective way to heal from that hurt is to forgive the person who inflicted it so you can pursue the life that you want and deserve to be living. 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/. 
© 2016

Thoughts of the Day

Photo by Sara Fogan

      Every now and then I like (and need) to take a few moments and remind myself about what is really important to me, in my life. If you follow me on my Calminsense Hypnotherapy Facebook page you may have seen some of these quotes before on this page, or will in the future. Many of these Quotes of the Day are beautiful examples and illustrations of the work I do as a hypnotherapist, so I will probably draw on them in future essays.

• “Confidence on the outside begins by living with integrity on the inside.” – Brian Tracy

• “If Plan A didn’t work, the alphabet still has 25 more letters.” – Claire Cook

• “The value of an idea lies in the using of it.” – Thomas Edison

• “To reach a goal we must set sail. Sail, not lie at anchor. Sail, not drift.” – Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

• “Worry is a down-payment on a problem you may never have.” – Joyce Meyer

• "Either you run the day or the day runs you." – Jim Rohn

• “When the day is over, let it go. Don’t dwell on what you could’ve or should’ve done. Tomorrow is another day and another chance.” – Mandy Hale

• “Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish on its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing it is stupid.” – Albert Einstein

• “Simplicity, patience, compassion; these three are your greatest treasures.” – Lao Tzu

• “Each one of us is the hero of our own life’s story.” – Lolly Daskal

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2016