(This blog was originally posted on
September 3, 2014)
“The secret of success is to be ready when
your
Everybody
has a different idea about success. You might define success as having a loving
family and being surrounded by good friends. For some people, being successful
means that they have achieved a high status or received accolades for their
work. For others, success means earning a lot of money and being wealthy. Regardless
of how you define it, it is unlikely that you are the only person in your
environment that has an opinion about what success really means. And, once again, your (and everyone else’s)
definition of success comes down to your mental script and the subconscious
knowns that created it.
John Kappas, Ph.D.’s Theory of Mind
explains how a person’s early-life experiences create the subconscious knowns
that form the foundation of his or her life script. Our understanding and
experience of success is created the same way. The founder of the Hypnosis Motivation Institute explained
how, from a very early age, we associate a literal or metaphoric value to
specific events that occur during our lifetime. Perhaps we are lavished with
verbal praise and profuse expression of affection from a parent or caregiver
when we do well, or we are given a monetary reward for earning good grades at
school. Over time, we create an association between that thing we did well (or
poorly) and other people’s response to that behavior. We also learn to
associate our own feelings (pride, shame) about that performance and people’s
response to what we have done. Furthermore, as we create an intrinsic
association between our valuation of success and failure, and reward and
consequences, we also develop expectations about how other people should value
that kind of performance. Our self-confidence and self-esteem may even take a
hit when other people do not acknowledge the quality of our work.
Regardless
of the way you consciously evaluate, describe and categorize success, your
subconscious mind has troves of associations between your idea of it and how it
physically, emotionally and even spiritually feels to “succeed.” Even if you
have recently experienced myriad financial setbacks, if your known association
of success means having a good job and earning a high salary, your subconscious
mind is primed to seek and recognize an opportunity to have that, again. If
your idea of success is to have a loving relationship and fulfilling family
life, trust your subconscious “knowns” of this experience to attract this for
you again. However, if your subconscious life script isn’t consistent with your
goals, dreams or expectations, maybe it is time to rewrite that script. Changing
your strategy for achieving your goals does not mean you have succeeded any
less. Rather, you have probably scored a greater achievement for recognizing
something wasn’t working and making appropriate adjustments to make your dream
come true. Going back to Former British Prime Minister Benjamin Disraeli’s sage
advice, the secret to success—whatever your definition of it may be—is to
always be looking for and ready to take a good opportunity when it is
presented. The outcome may be even better than the one you originally imagined.
