Showing posts with label avoidance. Show all posts
Showing posts with label avoidance. Show all posts

Wednesday, March 29, 2023

Defense Mechanisms: Undoing and Magical Thinking

 I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 


 (This blog was originally posted on October 7, 2014)

 

Photo courtesy of Microsoft

 

 

  My great-grandmother used to spit three times or throw salt over her shoulder if anyone said something that could be perceived as wishing bad fortune on another person or situation. Some people say “knock wood” or literally rap their knuckles on a wood surface to prevent an unwanted event. Others wash their hands or mime this behavior as if to cleanse themselves of an event or relationship they don’t want to be associated with. Many kids still make the “cross my heart” pledge to keep a secret or what have you. (In keeping with my grandma’s fear of tempting fate, I always left off the “and hope to die” part.) Each of these behaviors is an example of a defense mechanism, undoing, whereby a person performs some kind of ritual or gesture to negate the likelihood or power of a potential consequence of a behavior or belief.

   Similarly, magical thinking is another form of defense mechanism that entails creating associations—usually imagined and typically based in superstition—between an event and a behavior. There is a great scene in the 1990 film, Betsy’s Wedding, in which Betsy’s dad (Alan Alda) is shooting basketball hoops as he repeats the mantra, “If I make this basket, it will be a great day.” When he missed the basket, he keeps throwing that basketball at the net until (finally) the ball goes in and he feels relieved that he might have a good day. Other examples of magical thinking include the old adages about breaking your mother’s back if you step on a crack in the pavement or being cursed with bad luck if you walk under a ladder—seven years of it if you break a mirror. Neither undoing nor magical thinking truly has the ability to shield or protect a person from whatever consequence he or she believes could occur if the behavior is not performed. However, every time the possible consequence is avoided by performing the action reinforces the person’s belief in its effectiveness, which further encourages the person to keep repeating that behavior until he or she achieves the desired result.

  These and other defense mechanisms are strategies that enable a person to cope with a stressful situation in his or her life. Like other defense mechanisms, undoing and magical thinking are characterized by the following traits: 1) they are unconscious; 2) they are self-deceptive; 3) they contain elements of denial; 4) they distort reality through thoughts and action. Whenever we “avoid” suffering a possible consequence by performing that action, this success reinforces our belief (subconscious mental script) in the effectiveness of that ritual. This success also encourages us to repeat that behavior to avoid negative outcomes in other areas of our life.

   Defense mechanisms are fabulous temporary devices that can help us achieve such security. Undoing rituals such as throwing salt over the shoulder, knocking on wood, and crossing the heart with the promise “and hope to die” should this vow be broken are great examples of learned (and therefore known) behaviors. According to John Kappas, Ph.D.’s Theory of Mind, everyone is subconsciously motivated to maintain and/or restore a known physical and emotional status of comfort and security. Since the subconscious mind is motivated and even programmed to seek this comfort, we may adopt those defense-mechanism behaviors because we learned them from someone whom we trust who does or used to do the same thing. However, the primary role of a defense mechanism is to protect the subconscious mind from what it perceives as a threat or “pain” of having to deal with an unknown. These behaviors only provide a temporary perception of control over the environment. Eventually, we must deal with and resolve the primary issue that has triggered the defense mechanism to achieve personal growth.

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023

 

Wednesday, March 22, 2023

Defense Mechanisms: Denial

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

 

(This blog was originally posted on December 10, 2015)


Photo by Rick Hustead

 

    A baseball player rejects the doctor’s diagnosis that his injured shoulder will never again be strong enough to pitch on a Major League Baseball team, and has his agent contact various team to promote his case. A man refuses to believe that he is terminally ill and books a Mediterranean cruise for Christmas 2023. A mother continues to set a place for her teenage daughter at the dinner table even though the girl ran away six years ago and has never contacted her family since she left home. You continue to wear your wedding band and talk about your husband, even though your spouse has served you with divorce papers two weeks ago.

    These are examples of denial, a defense mechanism in which the mind blocks external events from entering our awareness by abolishing (negating) their very existence to reduce fear of the unknown (“pain”). Like other defense mechanisms, denial is: 1) unconscious; 2) self-deceptive; 3) and it distorts reality through thoughts and action. “Change is a threat to the subconscious mind,” said John Kappas, Ph.D. According to the Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder’s Theory of Mind, we are subconsciously motivated to maintain and/or restore a known physical and emotional status of comfort and security. The primary role of a defense mechanism is to protect the subconscious mind from what it perceives as a threat or “pain” of having to deal with an unknown.

It is possible to successfully “avoid” suffering emotional pain by temporarily ignoring or refusing to accept its existence, and such denial can go on for a very long time. However, our level of success (comfort) in negating an unpleasant event or emotion can only exist as long as we continue to believe our subconscious deception. Over time, becomes increasingly difficult to nurture this defense mechanism as we continue to perceive and process more and more information (message units) to contradict our fictional reality. Eventually, we must address the primary issue that has triggered the defense mechanism in order to resolve it and achieve personal growth.

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023