Turn It Around

(This blog was originally posted on February 19, 2014)

Photo courtesy of Microsoft

                A neighbor calls you at 2 a.m. to let you know that your dog has got out of the yard, and you have to chase him through the neighborhood before he finally heels and you can get him home. Your car doesn’t start, and you have to call road-side assistance to jump-start the engine so you can get to the mechanic and buy a new battery. You rush to get to work to meet a client, only to find out that your 11 a.m. appointment is a no-show. You agree to stay late to finish a project at work, and then get stuck in bumper-to-bumper traffic during the evening commute.

              Have you ever had a day like this? Okay, maybe not exactly like this, but frustrating (“bad”) in its way? What did you do about it? How did you react and handle the frustrations—or did you handle them, at all? One of my favorite strategies for dealing with an uncomfortable situation is to “turn it around.” Cheryl O’Neil, C.Ht., introduced me to this philosophy when I was training to become a hypnotherapist at the Hypnosis Motivation Institute. HMI founder John Kappas, Ph.D. coined this phrase. It is similar to the idea of every cloud has a silver lining, except you play an active role in creating your silver lining.

For example, rather than silently (or verbally) curse your canine companion for his naughtiness, you thank him for making you aware that you have a hole in your fence or that your gate is broken. Another advantage of your late-night jog through the neighborhood is that you are getting a good cardiac workout. When you have to make the unscheduled stop at the car-repair shop, this delay to your morning commute likely saved you from having to deal with rush-hour traffic. As for your no-show appointment at work, this is a great opportunity to catch up on other work or projects that need your attention: return phone calls, answer e-mails, rehearse the presentation you must give to your department next week, etc. While you are stuck in stop-and-go traffic during your drive home—when you are not moving—practice diaphragmatic breathing to help you relax. Start by drawing a slow, deep breath through your nose and hold it for five seconds, then release the breath through the mouth. You know you are doing this technique correctly because your tummy will extend or push out a little bit as you inhale, but the shoulders will not move. Imagine that as you inhale, you are drawing in patience, calm and relaxation; as you exhale, you are releasing any frustration and negative emotion that you have felt during the day. The goal is to clear your mind of the frustrations you have successfully dealt with today.  

Remember, the worst is over. Tomorrow is a new day, and all things are possible.

               

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

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