Wednesday, February 10, 2016

Horse Ownership: It's an Honor and a Privilege

Photo by Sara Fogan




Many years ago, I attended a case conference where Hypnosis Motivation Institute instructor Lisa Machenberg, C.Ht., described how she helped someone to regard even the negative, inconvenient aspects of car ownership in terms of being a privilege. Apparently this individual was procrastinating about getting new tires for his car because not having a vehicle for one morning would be inconvenient and expensive. His justification for not doing anything to facilitate the repair was: “Hey, the car is still drivable, so what is the rush?” 

Ms. Machenberg said the client eventually became motivated to get the tires changed when they explored the benefits—independence, convenience, the enjoyment of driving—and the potential consequences of not taking the car in. The greatest inspiration for him turned out to be the potential financial burden of having to pay for additional repairs to the body of his or another person’s car if a flat or blown-out tire caused a crash. At this point in the conversation, she said, they discussed how the benefits of car-ownership is as much a privilege as taking good care of the vehicle is a responsibility. This message became incorporated in the hypnotic script she created for his hypnotherapy. It also so resonated with me in terms of how I feel about owning a horse that I use it as a kind of mantra to keep persevering in my riding and how I take care of him, as well as to remind Galahad how much I love and appreciate him.

 As most equestrians (and even non-riders) know, riding and owning a horse is an expensive investment of time, money and emotion. Depending whom you ask, it can be a toss-up which one of these resources is most expensive at any one time. Despite their strength, size and speed, these animals are actually more fragile in some ways than they seem. For example, the extreme changes in summer-like temperatures we are experiencing in Southern California pose a greater risk of colic. (Who else has the barn veterinarian’s phone number on speed dial this week?) A training mishap can result in a pulled muscle, tendon or ligament for horse or rider. As the price of hay gets higher every season, finding a good deal on what we feed our equine partner also becomes more challenging and frustrating. After a heavy rain we must determine that the footing is good enough to turn the horse out to play or ride without risk of injuring the animal. Then there is the herculean effort it will take on our part to clean the gray gelding up after he enjoys rolling in the fresh mud that it looks like his original black coat has grown back. And so the list goes on.

By the time we’re done riding and have completed all the barn chores at the end of the day, all we want to do is get in a hot shower or bubble bath and wash the dirt and stress away. But, wait. The horse still needs to be properly cooled out, cleaned up and “tucked in” before we can do any of the other stuff. And that is what I mean by responsibility and privilege of owning a horse.

There is a common expression around most barns: If you don’t have time to groom, you don’t have time to ride. When I was a teen-ager, all I wanted to do was get on a horse and go, go, go; grooming afterward was not something I looked forward to and, in all honesty, I probable did a barely acceptable job. At that time, I didn’t have my own horse and there was always someone at the barn who would do the “dirty work” that students like me didn’t like or want to do. But my attitude did a complete 180-degree turn when I grew up and got a horse of my own.

I like to believe that the more time I spend grooming and hanging out with him or just watching him play with the other geldings in his herd, are opportunities where we do the most bonding. This is the time where the responsibility of horse-ownership truly is a privilege. Yes, riding is great and it is a lot of fun. The reward and pride I feel for both of us when we finally get those 20-meter circles round and circles is immense. But nothing is as wonderful, to me, as feeling my horse stretching his neck closer and into the curry comb while I massage the dust and dirt out of his coat afterward. 

There is nothing like the sound of his teeth crunching on a slice of apple or carrot when I reward him for working so hard for me during our lesson in the arena. There is nothing like hearing my trainer praise Galahad about his progress and improved skills after she finishes schooling him. There is nothing like how happy and proud I am when Galahad is able to calmly walk past barking dogs or that new donkey at a neighbor’s property during one of our neighborhood strolls. His calm demeanor at those moments are testament to his temperament as well as the time spent working to increase his self-confidence and trust in me when he feels challenged or threatened. There is nothing like the relief I feel when the veterinarian gives my horse a clean bill of health, or after Galahad’s hooves are trimmed or he has been wormed. And, yes, there is nothing like the satisfaction I feel each month when I pay for his board and training, or even when I pay dues to renew his insurance and breed memberships.

Like the client described at the beginning of this essay, horse ownership—like car ownership—is undoubtedly an incredible privilege. Horses bring so much joy, fun and pleasure to our lives that the time, physical effort and expense seem inconsequential. Knowing that one of these big (or small), powerful prey animals will cooperate, trust and even seem to seek our companionship is a wonderful honor to anyone who has an equine partner in his or her life.




Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.
© 2016


Tuesday, February 9, 2016

Hypnotherapy and Erik Erikson's Stages of Development



 According to psychologist Erik Erikson, personality develops throughout a person’s lifetime. In other words, you “become” the person you are, starting from birth until you die. Each stage is characterized or punctuated by a specific goal that you must achieve to progress to the next stage of development. If you do not overcome that challenge, however, you will continue to be affected by the unresolved issue that is associated with the stage of development in which you are stuck.

Dr. John Kappas incorporated Erikson’s Stages of Development into his therapeutic approach. The Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder believed that hypnotherapists must always try to alleviate a client’s presenting issue “symptomatically.” However, if that approach doesn’t work it may be necessary to uncover the cause of the person’s presenting problem.

“Many conditions may be ‘relieved’ later in life if they’re not completed,” Dr. Kappas said. “We always attempt to fulfill what’s missing.” If a client is stuck in one of these stages, the hypnotherapist must explain the stages of development and discuss where/why the conflict arose. It may also be necessary to explore why the stage of development hasn’t been completed, he explained.

However, Dr. Kappas warned that age-regression therapy should not be used to identify the cause of a client’s presenting problem that developed during one of those stages. This technique could inadvertently expose a host of other issues that the person had previously repressed or dealt with, which the hypnotherapist would have to help the individual address all over again. Furthermore, HMI does not endorse age-regression as a form of therapy and legal courts do not admit any evidence obtained using this method.

The goal of the therapy is to help the client resolve this conflict and set appropriate goals that are appropriate to facilitate progression to the stage of development that is appropriate for the client’s age, he said. Following is a summary of Erikson’s Eight Stages of Development:
Stage 1: Infancy (oral-sensory, birth-1 year). Conflict: trust vs. mistrust. Important event: feeding.
Stage 2: Early Childhood (muscular-anal, 1-3 years). Conflict: autonomy vs. doubt. Important events: Toilet training, suggestibility.
Stage 3: Play Age (locomotor, 3-6 years). Conflict: initiative vs. guilt. Important event: Independence.
Stage 4: School Age (6-12 years). Conflict: industry vs. inferiority (competence). Important event: School.
Stage 5: Puberty and Adolescence (12-18 years). Conflict: identity vs. role confusion. Important event: Peer relationship.
Stage 6: Young Adulthood (19-40 years). Conflict: intimacy/affiliation and love vs. isolation. Important event: Love relationships.
Stage 7: Middle Age (40-65 years). Conflict: generativity vs. stagnation/self-absorption. Important event: parenting.
Stage 8: Later life (Maturity, 65 years to death). Conflict: integrity vs. despair. Reflection on and acceptance of one’s life.




Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.
© 2016

Monday, February 8, 2016

Two Sides of the Same Coin, Redux



Photo courtesy of Microsoft




It is easy to go off course during a project. You don’t know what to say when someone asks you a question during a presentation at work. You forget how to play a piece of music at a recital for which you have spent months rehearsing. Time seems to stop as that crucial event and the split second in which “it” occurred are burned into your mind and memory, forever. But time continues to march on and, you still have your life to lead and that project/performance/game, etc. to complete. When your focus is disturbed, are you able to maintain your composure and carry on as if nothing is changed? Will you use the disruption to your advantage, or will you freeze and miss out on later opportunities to recover because you are still focused on what has already happened?

I saw both scenarios play out yesterday afternoon while I watched the Super Bowl 50. Unlike their disappointing Super Bowl outing against the Seattle Seahawks in 2014, the Denver Broncos gained control of the football early on and never really allowed their opposing team, the Carolina Panthers, to get it back. This year the Broncos kept a respectable point advantage and kept powering through the game. It was as if each interception, each sack, each block of the opposing side added another layer of confidence to the Broncos’ players. I knew that Denver was not a heavy favorite to win the game. However, the sentimental poignancy of Broncos Quarterback Peyton Manning possibly retiring from the NFL with a second Super Bowl championship was very alluring. (I admit it: I wanted that for him, too.) Coming from a “football” family—dad Archie Manning played in the NFL and younger brother Eli Manning is a quarterback for the New York Giants)—achieving this goal would be a very satisfying (possible) finish to his storied career.

A few days ago I had heard that Cam Newton, the Quarterback for the Carolina Panthers, was finishing high school senior when Peyton Manning won his first Super Bowl Championship in 2007. While I watched the game yesterday, I wondered what it was like for this young quarterback to be competing against the man who could very well have been a onetime role model and career inspiration. Did Newton have or model pass/play strategies that he once saw the former Indianapolis Colts Quarterback use to score one of many touchdowns? At nearly 40 years old, Manning is like an energizer bunny that just doesn’t seem to run out of energy. While his fans cheer, how intimidating must it be for a much younger athlete like Newton to wonder: how much advantage his strength and skill will I have and need to out-play equally talented and much more experienced player? Was the scenario like the famous scenes in Seabiscuit, where the horse only needed to look into his competitors’ eyes to sufficiently intimidate any opponent to make a virtually unchallenged run for the finish line? This kind of pressure can definitely feel soul-destroying.

At the end of the game, the Denver Broncos had more spring in their step on the field and on the sidelines while the Carolina Panthers were stuck in an endless loop of that first scrimmage—just as their opponents had been two years ago. Once again, I could see the frustration and disappointment on the team’s faces and, more importantly, in their demeanor. Each time a pass was intercepted or one of the Panthers was sacked or the football was intercepted, everyone on the team seemed to deflate a little bit more while their opponents got that much bigger.


The Denver Broncos had learned hard lessons from the experience of their disappointing play in the 2014 Super Bowl, while the Carolina Panthers had only played in one Super Bowl (2004). It would be completely understandable and expected that the novelty of the Big Game experience and the competitive presence of a record-breaking quarterback to send the Panthers into a kind of subconscious experiential overload. Despite their obvious talent and seeming lightning-quick speed, this time the Panthers weren’t able to effectively defend against the opposing team’s “defense” against them.

Two sides of the same coin.



Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.
© 2016