Trust

 

                “Never trust a person who doesn’t like chocolate.” Joan R. Neubauer’s statement was the featured quote-of-the day for today on my desktop calendar. At first glance, I completely agreed with her sentiment. Not only is chocolate one of my favorite foods and flavors; just about everyone in my family and many of my friends are self-professed “chocoholics.” However, I certainly know, work with and trust people who are not that fond of chocolate. One of my dear friends is even allergic to it; since chocolate makes her physically sick I imagine she doesn’t like to eat it or anything about it, but I trust and adore her. So, there is one generalization shot down.

                Trust is a very personal emotion and experience. We tend to trust people we like and with whom we share common interests and values. We evaluate and make judgments about people and situations based on the subjective and/or empirical evidence from those past experiences, or knowns. For example, if you have a negative experience with someone outside of your regular social group, you might automatically attribute this unpleasant experience to the fact that he or she does not like chocolate (or any other factor). But is this generalization truly accurate or fair? Maybe the true reason you didn’t get along with this person has nothing to do with a preferred flavor but that you do not share other values with him or her—or vice versa. Maybe, just maybe, the other person didn’t trust you because you didn’t share one of his or her core values, and that value had nothing to do with a sweet treat.

                Like friendship, trust—being trustworthy and trusting—is a two-way street. We learn through the repetition of that behavior (trusting) and associating the outcome of that trust (feeling physically and/or emotionally safe) whether the person or situation is actually trustworthy. When we can and do trust the people with whom we share important values, they are likely to deserve and reciprocate that trust. The caveat of this relationship is that repeated exposure to a situation also creates a known and reliable association (pleasure) between a behavior and a situation or outcome which is not necessarily comfortable or pleasurable. For example, we often hear about or even know individuals who continue to return to an emotionally or physically abusive relationship. Even when we can’t trust a person to behave in a nurturing way toward us, we may still derive some degree of security from the fact that we can trust the inconsistency of that relationship. Maybe what we most want and need is to be able to trust the consistency of someone’s behavior or the likely outcome of a situation.

                It’s something to think about.

 

 Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy®, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2014

 

Overcoming Fear of Flying with Hypnosis, Part 2

Photo courtesy of Fotolia

f you are afraid of flying, hypnotherapy and therapeutic guided imagery
can alleviate your anxiety and make your journey more comfortable.

 

 

 

                If you are afraid of flying, hypnosis and guided imagery can alleviate this anxiety and help to make your journey more comfortable. In this blog, I will describe how I use hypnosis and therapeutic guided-imagery concepts to help desensitize my clients to any negative associations they may have with and fear of flying.

                The first thing I do is confirm that the client has a fear and not a phobia of the stimulus (flying). According to Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D., a fear is distinguished from a phobia if it has a specific cause or origin. For example, if the plane you were last on went through a thunderstorm and you experienced a lot of turbulence and sudden drop in altitude or a loved one dying in a crash, you might develop a fear of flying. Conversely, a phobia is a generalized anxiety response that is associated with low blood-sugar levels and no specific event triggered the reaction.

                Once I make this determination, I will teach the person some basic relaxation techniques, such as diaphragmatic breathing and special-place imagery. When the client is in hypnosis and is in a deep state of relaxation, I will help him or her to create a finger-press anchor to “lock in” that sensation of calm and comfort, which the person can employ if and when he or she feels anxious or afraid. I also guide the person through a series of imagery exercises to desensitize him or her to anticipatory anxiety about flying and to the specific stimulus or stimuli that trigger the fear or anxiety response (e.g., words such as terminal, last call and final destination). I also have the person “rehearse” preparing for and taking the scheduled flight: making travel arrangements, packing for the flight, waking up the day of the trip, eating a nutritious meal, leaving for the airport and boarding the plane. During this exercise, the client gets to visualize, imagine picture or pretend that he or she hears and sees the doors close on the aircraft and feel the plane take off, fly for the estimated duration of the journey and land at the destination. I will then guide the client through a similar exercise to prepare for the trip home.

                I incorporate the client’s words/expressions in the hypnotic script to emphasize and reinforce his or her reasons/motivations to overcome the fear (or phobia) about flying. I use guided imagery to help the client replace negative associations between the sensation of flying, with that of the deep relaxation and sense of calm and comfort experienced during hypnosis. In this and future hypnotherapy sessions, I will continue to desensitize the person to triggers of this fear of flying and reinforce the new association between feeling confident, relaxed and in control while traveling in an airplane. Once the client has returned to an alert state I will provide some practical tips to further reduce anxiety while traveling and provide a recording of the hypnosis/visualization portion of the session to further reinforce this relaxed state.

Practical tips to make your flight more comfortable:

·         Drink water and eat a nutritious meal that contains protein to keep your mood even and anxiety low.

·         Do not drink alcohol or caffeinated beverages before or during the flight, which can affect suggestibility and may increase your anxiety.

·         Get plenty of sleep the night before you travel.

·         Listen to the reinforcement track before bed the night before your flight and on a personal stereo during the flight.

·         Practice diaphragmatic breathing and activate the finger-press anchor whenever you need to reduce stress or anxiety before or during the flight.

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2014

Overcome Fear of Flying With Hypnosis, Part 1

Photo courtesy of Fotolia

If you are afraid of flying, hypnotherapy and therapeutic guided imagery
can alleviate your anxiety and make your journey more comfortable. 

 

                With the approach of June and the end of the school year, many people are planning and preparing for their summer vacations. Even if you plan to take a cruise, at least part of your travel itinerary is likely to be by air. If you are afraid of flying, hypnosis and guided imagery can alleviate this anxiety and help to make your journey more comfortable. In this blog, I will suggest some ideas and concepts to help desensitize you to any negative associations you may have with flying and air travel.

·         Wrong words: Airport staff, flight attendants and ground crew often make a lot of unintentional negative associations with flying: e.g., terminal (airport building), departure lounge and last and final call to board the airline, final destination of your journey. These are just words and part of flying jargon; they are not meant to imply negative consequences of flying and air travel.

·         Flying is still one of the safest forms of travel and is statistically less dangerous than driving an automobile.

·         Airplanes are constructed to have several safety (and back-up safety) mechanisms and computers to keep the crew and passengers safe throughout the journey.

·         Pilots have thousands of hours of training in flight simulators before they sit at the controls of a commercial jet; even then, they will be working with/supervised by a pilot with more experience to deal with various flight conditions, turbulence and other air emergencies.

·         Air-traffic control centers are trained to and responsible for monitoring each commercial airplane at specific parts of the flight, from takeoff until landing. The pilot, co-pilot and any other officer on board will be in constant verbal and radar contact with the air-traffic control officers that are monitoring your flight.

·         The pilot(s) and flight crew all have a vested interest to have a smooth flight and a safe (and timely) arrival. They are well-trained to handle various air emergencies and are highly unlikely to do anything to jeopardize their or their passengers’ safety.

·         Finally, since the terrorist attacks on 9/11/2001 passengers and flight crew are aware of potential risks and have proven they are prepared to physically subdue a potential or suspected threat during the flight.

 

In my next blog, I will describe some hypnosis and therapeutic guided-imagery techniques that I use to help people work through and overcome their fear of flying.

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2014

 

An Ounce of Prevention

 

                On Saturday, an equine dentist examined and floated my horse’s teeth. Just like people, our animal companions need to have their teeth examined and/or cleaned to ensure that they are able to eat and digest their food. More important, these check-ups can prevent a tooth infection from spreading to the gum and into the bloodstream, which could be deadly. Looking back on the afternoon, I considered the many different things that I and other people do to prevent physical, emotional, social and practical problems from arising. What motivates us to take these precautions?

In the autumn, many people get a vaccination to prevent getting the flu later in the season. They start drinking more juice, taking vitamins and eating well to stave off a winter chest infection. When they have a cough, fever or running nose, they usually don’t need much persuasion to see a doctor and, if necessary, pick up a prescription for medication to relieve their discomfort. When we move to a new neighborhood or change jobs or schools, many people make some kind of gesture to create a social or professional alliance. My dad used to give a loaf of home-made French bread to new neighbors who moved into a home on our street; I made chocolate-chip cookies to share with my colleagues when I started a new job at the magazine. People who play contact sports usually don at least some kind of protective head gear to safeguard against concussion; many also wear other kinds of body armor to protect their limbs and chest. In each of these cases, the person makes a conscious decision to behave in a specific way that will protect or safeguard his or her well-being.

The decision to seek hypnotherapy to achieve a vocational or avocational self-improvement goal is also a conscious one. Even though I use specific techniques to access a client’s subconscious mind to effect the desired behavior change, the person must first make a conscious decision to seek this therapy. In addition to their desire to quit a habit that is interfering with their life right now, many people seek hypnotherapy to help them change a behavior that they fear will cause a bigger problem for them later on. For example, when I work with people to stop smoking or lose weight, their primary motivation to change their behavior (smoking or over-eating) is often to improve their health. Perhaps the person is at risk of cardiovascular disease or diabetes, and a doctor has advised that the best chance of increasing his or her longevity is to start following a healthy lifestyle. Others may want to increase their motivation, because procrastination has resulted in their missing deadlines at work, or failure to get their car in for a scheduled service caused more serious mechanical problems on the road. Many times, even after they achieve their stated goals, people want to continue with the hypnotherapy to help motivate them to continue to follow the new behaviors that have improved their lives.

Hypnosis and therapeutic guided imagery are effective, natural and drug-free techniques through which you can achieve these and other self-improvement goals. Whether you are ready to embark on this journey for the first time or just want to fine-tune the new behaviors or skills you have been working on to avoid temptation, I am here to help you achieve them.

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2014

 

Tune Out the Noise

Photo courtesy of Fotolia

 

                Even if you enjoy working in a busy environment, sometimes even a little bit of noise is too much of a distraction. The sound of ringing phones, the constant thwack-thwack sound of typing on computer keyboards and the distant din of conversations in the break room are about to send you through the roof. Your project deadline is looming, but you doubt you will be able to accomplish anything at all with all of this chaos going on around you. Help!

                One of the most useful techniques I have found to facilitate working in a chaotic office environment is to simply convert the annoying external stimuli into a form of white noise that will deepen your focus and sense of calm. As soon as you enter a busy work environment and before you start to feel overwhelmed, draw several slow, deep breaths through your nose. Visualize, imagine, picture or pretend that you are inhaling the amount and kind of energy you need to focus on and accomplish your task. When you exhale, release the breath through your mouth. Focus on releasing any emotional frustration and/or physical tension you may be carrying in your body. Give yourself the following suggestion: “Every sound and everything I see around me is helping to deepen my focus and concentration and improve my attention to detail on what I am working on. I give myself permission to take regular breaks in my work so I can continue to be creative and energetic. The whole time, I am and will remain completely alert and aware of everything that is going on in my environment so my colleagues and I can and will continue to work safely and efficiently.”

                Your subconscious mind is most suggestible to you; therefore, it is important to use positive words and positive energy when you craft this suggestion. Be sure to drink plenty of water and eat meals and snacks that contain protein to sustain your energy, stamina and focus at work. This technique is not designed to help you tune-out to aspects of your environment but will enable you to continue to work well despite the environmental distractions around you. Do not use this technique while driving or operating heavy machinery.

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2014

Mother's Day

 

                There is no one in the world like a mother. Today, to celebrate Mother’s Day, I would like to tell you about mine.

                When I think about my mother, I am in awe. I marvel at the things she has accomplished in her life, the challenges she has overcome and the joy she brings to my life. I am inspired by everything she is as a woman and as a mother. She is my biggest champion and my loudest cheerleader. She is always there to provide a warm, comforting shoulder to cry on or to deliver the pointed pep talk to motivate me when I need it. Her love always makes me feel protected, supported and secure.

                My mother imparts her wisdom and love in the small and in the big things she does. She prepares meals when she is tired. She smiles when she is sad. She forgives when she is hurt. When I don’t feel well, she is the first person to check on me to make sure I am drinking enough fluids and getting enough rest. If I want or need something, more often than not she surprises me with that desired object weeks or months later. By then, I have often forgotten that I even mentioned wanting or pointing it out to her, which makes her present even more special to me.

                My mother is my greatest confidant, my very best friend. She is one of the few people with whom I can sit in comfortable silence and just be in the moment. She is someone I can laugh with about the goings-on in one of our favorite television shows, compare favorite recipes and discuss the heavy issues we see or hear about in the news. She shows me by example how to give love and respect the people I care about. She has taught and continues to teach me so much about life by just watching her live hers.

                To my most beloved mother and yours, I wish you a very happy Mother’s Day!

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2014

 

Marketing and Promoting Hypnotherapy

 

                Someone recently contacted me to find out more information about hypnotherapy and whether hypnosis could help him to achieve a particular goal. We chatted for a while, and I gave him some information about hypnotherapy and how I use hypnosis and therapeutic guided imagery to help my clients achieve various vocational and avocational self-improvement goals. At the end of our conversation, he wanted to know if there was anywhere he could read more information about my experience as a certified hypnotherapist so he could make a decision about whether to give hypnotherapy a try. I gave him my business card and brochure and referred him to my website (www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com) so he could read more about me and what I do.

                After we said goodbye, I thought about our conversation in the context of the best and most effective ways to disseminate information not just about my practice but hypnosis and hypnotherapy in general. Even though it is becoming a more mainstream therapy, I am aware that people are still a little wary about hypnosis. They want to know if they will become vulnerable to some kind of mind control or manipulation while they are in hypnosis. Will they do or say something stupid or embarrassing, or break a confidence or reveal a bank pass-code while they are in-state? (The answer is no, no, no and no.) But the fact that these concerns remain prevalent suggests to me that my colleagues and I need to continue to share the facts and dispel the myths about what we do.

One of the best ways to do this is through conversations with people about what we do. Here are some suggestions for the most effective ways that I have found to share this information:

 

·         Advertise and write blogs/articles: I limit my advertising budget to a few equestrian-themed publications. However, I write a hypnotherapy-themed blog just about every night to keep spreading the word about the many ways hypnosis and John Kappas, Ph.D.’s model, Theory of Mind, are generally relevant to daily life. I specifically tailor the topics of my essays to illustrate how the therapeutic techniques I learned or behaviors I studied during my training and continuing education at the Hypnosis Motivation Institute are relevant to my (and your!) daily life. I let people know when I have written a new blog by posting a short “announcement” about it on Twitter and on my personal and business Facebook accounts. I also provide a link that will take you directly to the blog on my website.

·         Business cards and brochures: These are still among the most effective (and immediate) ways to promote your practice. I always carry business cards with me to give out. I have “rented” space at my local tack store to display my cards for prospective equestrian clients, and my bank does this for me, for free!

·         Donate hypnotherapy session(s) or handwriting analysis: Hypnotherapy sessions and/or formal handwriting analyses are unusual (and intriguing) prizes in a silent-auction or raffle at a fundraiser or social event. The best way for people to learn about hypnosis is to experience it.

·         Dress code: Hypnotherapists, as therapists, follow professional codes of ethics and conduct. Wear clothes that best represent what you do as a therapist and your commitment to this work of helping your clients achieve their goals.

·         Marketing materials: When I am out running errands on the weekend, I typically wear a baseball cap with my company name and website on it. I want people to ask me about the words they are reading so I can tell them about what I do and how hypnosis is an effective tool to help people change undesired behaviors.

·         Network in the community: Introduce yourself to local chiropractors, masseuses, hair-stylists, yoga instructors, your bank, dry cleaners, etc. Let people know what you do, where you are located and how much you charge for your sessions. Even other hypnotherapists can be a great source of referrals if you specialize in different areas than they do: e.g., hypnosis to improve sports performance versus smoking cessation.

·         Professional affiliations: Keep up your professional affiliations, such as the American Hypnosis Association, the Hypnotherapists Union, your local chamber of commerce, etc. In addition to providing professional support these organizations will often “link” the website for your practice with theirs. (Be sure to return the favor!)

·         Professional referrals: At some point in our career as a hypnotherapist, we may need to refer a client to a licensed medical doctor or mental health worker for further evaluation or to provide assistance that is out of our scope of expertise. Similarly, once the physician has ruled out any medical causes of his patient’s headache, he may refer the patient to you as a hypnotherapy client so you can help him manage the stress that causes his pain.

·         Promote your practice through social media: I am active on Twitter and Facebook and write/post about various topics. Of course, I have provided information about my practice, Calminsense Hypnotherapy®, on these accounts. However, it is not necessary to “talk shop” all the time to get attention for your practice. Several of my Twitter followers have become specifically interested in what I do, but only after we had been communicating about our mutual interests for many months.

·         Website: A good website goes a long, long way to “market” you to a wide population. Be sure to update the site periodically by posting new client referrals, updating your professional certifications and even changing the photographs or design to refresh the search programs.

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2014