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Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Riding Lessons

(This blog was originally posted on June 15, 2011)

Photo courtesy of Sara Fogan

When it comes to riding and working with horses, my education is on-going. Following are several things I have learned:

· Know your geometry. When it comes to horses and riding, everything has a shape—even a straight line. Galahad and I are working on trotting a perfectly round 20-meter circle. (Let’s face it: the perfectly round circle is a lifelong goal for most equestrians!) This is more difficult than it looks: Both of us have a more comfortable “side” that we like to work on, and I tend to lean to the inside while he likes to bulge to the outside. Therefore, I keep tracing a mental image of that round circle in my mind as we trot the pattern on the ground…all while I am using my seat, leg and hand aids to keep the horse “straight”!

· Ride with your eyes. This is one of horseman Chris Cox’s mantras, and his advice really been comes in handy as I practice those circles. If I don’t look where I’m going, I can’t expect my horse to know where I want us to be. But even more important is, when I sit straight and tall in the saddle, looking straight ahead where I want to ride my body is in better balance, which helps my horse to maintain his balance as he trots forward.

· Ride the next stride. In other words, “the show must go on.” Every time you work with a horse, you need to have a plan. Where are you going to ride? What are you going to work on? The horse is looking to you to be his “leader,” so you must be worth following. It is easy and natural to become distracted by what is happening or has just happened during a ride. Whether your horse spooks or your circle is starting to look like a potato or the ride is going perfectly, keep riding forward. Rather than become distracted or obsess about what has just happened, file a mental note in your mind about how you dealt with the issue and ride on.

· Stay in balance. Riders are often reminded that if they look down at the ground when they ride, they will be “picking the spot to land.” That may be true, but if you are feeling dizzy or off-balance when you ride, this will also affect the horse you are on. Riders at the Spanish Riding School, in Vienna, do not ride with stirrups when they ask their horses to perform the “airs above the ground” because he needs to find his balance on the horse without interfering with the animal’s balance. On several occasions, I have felt Galahad shift his balance beneath me. Even though I didn’t feel off-balance, something didn’t feel right or comfortable to him so he adjusted his body to accommodate whatever was going on with me. This experience is actually very humbling and reinforced how much the rider’s balance can affect the ease, comfort and even safety the horse can move with someone on his back.

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

The Reaction Formation

Have you ever felt (secretly) very hostile or resentful of a sibling or colleague but still behaved in a considerate, solicitous and even friendly way toward that individual? Or, have you ever put on a brave face and nonchalantly agreed to ski down a more advanced run even though you felt (privately) terrified to advance past the bunny slope? If so, you have experienced a defense mechanism known as the reaction formation.

This response is characterized by transforming negative emotions or behaviors—or, more accurately, emotions or behaviors that are perceived to be negative or inappropriate—into a more desirable and functional form. Like all other defense mechanisms, the reaction formation is characterized by four common traits: 1) it is unconscious; 2) it is self-deceptive; 3) it contains elements of denial; 4) it distorts reality through thoughts and action. Their primarily role is to protect the subconscious mind from what it perceives as a threat or “pain.” In this case, the pain would be caused by our peers negatively judging our attitudes or behavior that contradicts acceptable beliefs or behaviors: “How can/why do you resent someone you barely know just because he or she possesses a specific skill or talent?” Rather than risk other people’s criticism of your feelings—the origins of which are unclear even to you—you overcompensate and cultivate those more socially acceptable behaviors to be accepted in your social group.

According to Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D.’s Theory of Mind, we are all subconsciously motivated to maintain and/or restore a known physical and emotional status of comfort and security. In this case, social acceptance represents pleasure, whereas criticism and potential rejection from our peers are pain. Since the SCM is motivated and even programmed to seek the pleasure stimuli, we may adopt these defense mechanisms to literally “defend” against potential social rejection (pain). For example, a veterinary student who so transforms his personal dislike of dogs to specialize in caring for canines has a greater chance of running a successful veterinary practice, where dogs are often patients.

Even though almost everyone uses one to ameliorate an undesirable reaction to an unpleasant circumstance at some point, these defense mechanisms provide only a temporary perception of control over the environment. Eventually, we have to deal with and resolve the primary issue that triggered the defense mechanism to achieve personal growth.

Monday, February 16, 2015

Animals and Hypnotherapy House Calls

Photo courtesy of Microsoft/Bing

The first time I make a house-call to work with one of my hypnotherapy clients in his or her house, I always ask whether the individual has a dog or a cat in the home. The reason why I want to know this has nothing to do with my love for (which I do) or fear of (which I generally don’t) animals. Rather, I want to know this because most pets react in some way when their human goes into a trance state.

Even the most minute alteration in our breathing rhythm, speech pattern and/or movement or any number of minute physiological “tells” that are invisible to us immediately alert our animals when we are no longer in our usual alert and aware state. I have worked with many people whose dogs started to bark or whine as soon as they went into hypnosis. While these sounds don’t necessarily distract me from the hypnotherapy work I am doing, clients often get distracted and even distressed by their pet’s obvious confusion about their subtly altered state of conscious awareness. To avoid this, I usually suggest that the animal be secured in another room or outside during the hypnotherapy session; an even better solution is for another resident in the house to take the dog for a walk or to the park. That way, the client can enjoy the calm and relaxation that hypnosis provides while the pet does not have to sound the alarm about its human’s unusual behavior.

Over time and repeated home visits, pets typically get used to having me around and their owner’s unusual, uber-mellow demeanor during the hour or so that I am there. Sometimes the animals even hang out as if they are observing the session, themselves. Many even settle down for a long morning or afternoon nap beside the client. I don’t know that these pets actually become hypnotized along with their human, but they generally seem more relaxed and mellow by the time I leave.

Friday, February 13, 2015

What Do You Eat?

Photo Courtesy of Microsoft

When Bill Maher asked when was the last time your (generic) doctor asked you what you eat on the February 6, 2015 episode of Real Time with Bill Maher, I started to wonder the same thing. Depending on what the blood-test results show, a lecture about the dangers of high cholesterol and how certain foods affect this level may be forthcoming. They also want to know if and how much I exercise each week; presumably that is because exercise is an easily quantifiable and relatively benign question to ask. Ditto for getting the stats about daily alcohol consumption (basically, none). But I honestly could not remember any time a physician or even a nurse (RN or LVN) asked me what I actually eat on a regular basis versus offering advice about what to avoid eating, altogether.

However, one of the first things I do ask my hypnotherapy clients is about their diet. This is true whether the person wants to increase his or her self-confidence, improve a golf swing or lose weight. I want to find out what they eat and even when they eat. I want to know these details because nutrition plays a huge role in how we perceive and respond to events in our environment.

Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D., observed that low blood-sugar levels can exacerbate or even cause a person’s presenting problem (behavior or belief). For example, a sudden drop in blood sugar can trigger physical symptoms such as shaking, light-headedness and feeling tired, or even psychological symptoms such as depression, paranoia, irritability and memory problems. Furthermore, Dr. Kappas found an association between a person’s low blood-sugar levels and fluctuating suggestibility with the onset of a phobic response. (This fluctuation in suggestibility literally becomes obvious in our handwriting: lines of writing literally become “wavy” when the person is hungry and blood-sugar level is lower).

Not only do I ask my clients about their food choices and eating patterns, I describe how and why what they ingest (and imbibe) can affect their behavior. In addition, I explain how eating nutritious meals that contain protein prevents the sudden drop in blood-sugar level that can contribute to those physical and psychological symptoms of anxiety. If and when necessary, I will also refer a client for a further medical and/or psychological evaluation if the individual describes eating behaviors (e.g., bingeing/purging, starvation) or beliefs about food or nutrition that are out of scope of my professional expertise.

Thursday, February 12, 2015

Progress at Your Own Speed

Opportunities and events rarely just drop into our laps. An immediate, successful outcome is not guaranteed. Usually we must put in a lot of work and have a lot of motivation to reach a goal or milestone. Days, weeks, months and even years can pass without making any obvious progress toward our goal. During that time it is easy to become frustrated and even disillusioned about when/whether/if we will ever get our “break.” Sometimes life even steps in and replaces the original goal and desired outcome with something better than you could have ever dreamed of.

Recently, my dad commented (again) how excellent it was that actor Benedict Cumberbatch has enjoyed such great success in the film industry. However, he has certainly been paying his dues as an actor for many years—mostly on stage in Britain and some roles in television movies and series in Britain and in America. Receiving an Oscar nod for his portrayal of Alan Turing in The Imitation Game, well, that’s quite an endorsement for the Sherlock star’s acting chops, is it not? Of course, Mr. Cumberbatch’s story is not one of overnight success, at all. Do you remember his very minor role as a cavalry officer in Steven Spielberg’s (2011) film, War Horse? As he landed roles in bigger projects, it just seemed like he suddenly popped out of the woodwork. He had the lead role in the film about Julian Assange and a role in August: Osage County, a major film starring Meryl Streep and Julia Roberts. He even voiced the dragon in a recent Lord of the Rings movie.

Meanwhile, actress Julianne Moore has been acting in and headlining films for approximately twenty-five years. She has received five Academy Award nominations, including her current nod for Still Alice. It seems likely that she will finally win a long-overdue Oscar this year, so say Hollywood pundits, but who knows? Meanwhile, Ms. Moore carries on promoting the movie and working and perfecting her craft.

And, what about the unexpected play that New England Patriot cornerback Malcolm Butler made during the Super Bowl XLIX? Just when it looked like Seattle Seahawk’s wide receiver, Ricardo Lockette, was about to catch the touchdown-winning pass in the end zone in the last few minutes of the game, Butler jumped up and grabbed the ball instead. Suddenly, the comfortable 10-point—and then manageable three-point—lead that the Seahawks had been enjoying through most of the second half of the game was reduced to a four-point deficit from which Seattle would not be able to overcome. Throughout the game, both teams had played hard and made strategic mistakes that could have changed the outcome, but there was no denying that the Patriots constantly continued working and fighting for those winning points. Their unbeatable lead may not have happened as early in the game as New England would have liked, but their never-surrender attitude and determination to win ultimately paid off in the end.

One of the biggest challenges many of us face is being patient with ourselves as we strive to accomplish something. As you pursue that promotion at work are you compromising your health by getting little or no sleep and poor nutrition? The physical consequences of these behaviors could affect your perception, mood and ability to focus or problem-solve, which could inadvertently jeopardize your chances of being promoted. Are you so focused on completing a project that you neglect relationships with or responsibility to family or friends? Are you so focused on attracting that perfect partner that you pay no attention to your professional goals and other social bonds? Where and how will your goal, once it is accomplished, fit and balance with other important areas of your life?

Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Age-Regression on The Blacklist

(Spoiler Alert: This blog contains details about the story arc of a recent

episode of The Blacklist. Do not continue reading this article if you have

not yet seen but plan to watch Luther Braxton: Conclusion)

Ah, the practice of age-regression has reared its controversial head once again.

When she was a little girl, FBI Agent Elizabeth Keen’s parents supposedly died in a tragic house-fire. Fast-forward twenty-five years or so where a scene in NBC’s hit television series The Blacklist, titled Luther Braxton: Conclusion, has Keen being held hostage while a physician conducts an age-regression to reveal the location of a mysterious object. Her kidnapper, Braxton, and even protagonist Raymond “Red” Reddington believes that the woman knows what happened the night Keen’s home burned down and where the object is located. However, neither the hypnosis nor the drug cocktail of muscle-relaxants and truth serums seem to have any effect on her even when she insists that she also wants to know the truth about what happened that night.

As I explained in a previous blog titled Age Regression…And Why I Don’t Use This Technique to Uncover Traumatic Memories, age regression is a very dangerous procedure in that it can cause unnecessary psychological trauma for the client. When the subconscious mind “buries” a memory or “forgets” what happened during a traumatic incident, this is the SCM’s way of protecting the individual from further distress from thinking about or even reliving what happened. Repressed memories are common among people who have experienced psychological/physical/sexual abuse or other significant traumas such as the one that Agent Keen has experienced.

During the 1970s and 1980s, age-regression hypnosis was used as a crime-solving technique, especially to reveal previous sexual abuse which experts at that time believed was the cause of all psychological problems. Some people theorized that hypnosis would be a useful technique to rewind a person’s memory of a traumatic incident to discover what had happened. They held that once such information was revealed, hypnosis could help the victim to vent out repressed memories to resolve any feelings about and reactions to the trauma. Eventually, however, experts realized that this technique did not help either the client (alleged abuse victim) or lawyers to prosecute their cases because memories are filled with distortion and amnesia. In addition, when a person is under hypnosis he or she becomes highly suggestible and very eager to please the hypnotist. A highly emotional-suggestible client will infer that the hypnotist wants to hear certain information, and will duly provide those details.

However, I do not use age regression to discover (or help my client discover) information or memories that the person is not ready to address. When a terrible trauma has occurred, a person knows how to breathe, sleep, eat and eliminate. If a memory is too traumatic, the mind creates a “scab” over that memory to protect the individual from further trauma or stress. Just like you wouldn’t pull a scab off of an abrasion, I do not use hypnosis to rip a similar scab off your mind. Again, since there is no way to prove the veracity of any memories that a person regains while under hypnosis, this information would not be allowed in a court of law.

By the way, Agent Keen was unable to recover most of her lost memories in last week’s episode of The Blacklist. This outcome did not surprise me, however, since a person will not and cannot be made to say or do anything in hypnosis that he or she would not say or do while in an alert and aware state. Her subconscious mind kept fighting to protect her from painful memories of a past trauma despite every attempt—including Keen’s stated intent to remember—to bring them up. (There was a brief allusion to the possibility that she had previously been hypnotized to forget those painful memories in the first place, but that’s a topic for a different day.)

In conclusion, I would like to remind you that my first responsibility to my clients is to do no harm. As a certified hypnotherapist, my role is to help you achieve your vocational or avocational self-improvement goal. If you should spontaneously remember a traumatic incident, I will use hypnosis to help your present reality be more powerful than the past, and refer you to a licensed psychologist or other medical professional for additional professional support in areas that are outside my scope of expertise in hypnotherapy.

Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Don't Let Them Grind You Down

Positive self-esteem is a strong predictor of whether you can and will accomplish a goal. When our self-esteem is high, so is our self-confidence. Nothing seems beyond our ability to achieve, and we put out all the stops working to succeed. Unfortunately, other people’s negative opinions or beliefs about these abilities can have a deleterious influence on our success, as well as our self-image.

During my hypnotherapy training at the Hypnosis Motivation Institute, I observed in an in-class demonstration of muscle testing (kinesiology) to show how positive or negative energy can affect our beliefs in ourselves and our abilities. During the presentation, a volunteer held his arms out perpendicular to his body while the class sent “positive” images and thoughts about his ability to keep his arms elevated. The volunteer was told to think similar positive messages during the experiment, and his arms stayed at that elevation. Then the class was instructed to send or think negative beliefs about the volunteer being unable to hold his arms up anymore. Sure enough, his arms dropped several inches and the person described how difficult it felt to sustain that position even though he continued to send himself positive messages about being able to do so. In the next experiment, the volunteer’s arms dropped to his thighs when he also sent negative messages about his inability to keep his arms elevated. Finally, the class and the volunteer were instructed to think and send positive messages about his ability to hold his arms perpendicular to his body once again, which he was able to do.

I witnessed a similar “demonstration” about how belief in self can affect performance during the January 24, 2015 episode of Saturday Night Live. In one sketch, musical guest/host Blake Shelton kept interrupting a magic show by declaring that the purported “magician” couldn’t actually do magic and that magic wasn’t real. Even though the magician continued to demonstrate his prowess by doing successful card tricks, etc., Shelton continued his tirade and challenged the performer to use magic on him to prove otherwise. Ultimately the magician’s self-confidence got so worn down after listening to repeated disparaging comments about his skill that even he started to doubt his ability when he couldn’t complete a card trick. He and the rest of his audience even agreed that magic didn’t really exist when the “spell” he tried to cast on Shelton apparently failed. However, once the naysayer stormed off in disgust, the magician was able to complete another magic trick. His belief in himself (self-esteem) and his self-confidence immediately went up. He declared that magic really does exist and performed another successful trick as the audience applauded with approval.

HMI founder John Kappas, Ph.D.’s Theory of Mind tells us that we start receiving message units the moment we are born. Between the ages of five and eight, we start taking these messages directly into the subconscious mind. In addition, as we get older we are also strongly influenced by what our peers think about us and our abilities. Even negative messages that cause emotional pain such as criticism about our ability to succeed will be accepted and integrated to help form our life script. Negative messages create negative beliefs, and unless or until those beliefs are replaced with positive ones, our self-image will not improve even if our physical ability and strength has actually changed.

Remember: The path to a positive self-image starts with self-confidence and self-esteem you feel from the inside. Once these beliefs are there, keep reinforcing the positive messages in your mind so they become an indelible part of your subconscious mental script. Negativity can only gain a foothold in our subconscious minds if we invite and allow it to grow there in the first place, so don’t let other people’s negativity grind you down with them.