|Photo by Rick Hustead|
Safety and legal restrictions aside, has it ever occurred to you that one of the reasons why you don’t try something you really want to do is that you don’t allow yourself to do it? By “allow,” I am referring to your subconscious mind and your subconscious mental script.
When I was in junior-high and high school there was an unspoken expectation that “girls weren’t good at math.” Of course, some of them absolutely were, but I bought into that stereotype to such an extent that I likely sabotaged my success in those classes. It got to the point where my high-school geometry teacher suggested I talk to my academic advisor about transferring to a different class. Both men were surprised I was an honor student except for that class. Long story short, I asked my neighbor—my “surrogate mom” who was not only a teacher but also happened to be very good at math—to tutor me after school. I worked very hard to improve my overall grade, and I was the only one to earn a 100-percent score on the first-semester final exam.
Is this an example of giving myself permission to succeed or just hard work and determination to succeed? I think it is a bit of both. I didn’t know about subconscious mental scripts back then, but I am confident that my attitude and desire to change that current negative situation into a positive one. In my subconscious mind, I had to give myself permission to believe that a different outcome was possible to become willing to put in the hard work that would help me achieve my goal.
These days I have a much better understanding about how the subconscious mind works, so I typically include a suggestion to “give yourself permission” when I work with my hypnotherapy clients. For example, it is not uncommon for someone who has never been hypnotized to feel nervous or even resist going into the hypnotic state during the first hypnotherapy session. This may also be true during subsequent sessions when a client is working on letting go of an unwanted belief, habit or behavior. However, once I offer the hypnotic suggestion for the individual’s subconscious mind to give permission to change that behavior, acceptance of this new belief becomes obvious as the client’s breathing deepens and the physical body becomes more visibly relaxed.
It may also be necessary to give yourself permission to do something during your day-to-day life, even when you are not in hypnosis or at a hypnotherapy session. Some people, especially women, may find it difficult to set personal boundaries and say “no” when they really don’t want to do something or accept another role/responsibility at work. It is okay to say no. It is also okay to say yes. So starting right now, so long as it you are not imposing your will or desires on anyone else, go ahead and do what makes you feel comfortable. Try something new and do something that you want to do. Give yourself permission to believe in yourself and your ability to succeed!
Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.