Selective Listening

All hypnotherapy sessions are conducted via phone or Zoom. 

 

(This blog was originally posted on March 2, 2017)

 

Photo by Rick Hustead

 

Winning. Losing. Some people do a lot of one; others do a lot of the other. No matter what you do, the more you practice (repeat) a behavior, the more likely it is to become a habit. And as many of us know, it can be very difficult to change an unwanted behavior because, well, change is hard.

As I explained in a previous blog titled Traditions: It’s All in the Family, the subconscious part of the mind likes and wants to do what is familiar (known), because this sense of familiarity represents “safety” and comfort. Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D. proposed that human behavior is based on the subconscious mental scripts that we create during early childhood. During this time the subconscious mind is accumulating and storing various message units that will ultimately comprise the subconscious life script. We will behave and even think in ways that are consistent with it even when the script does not facilitate achievement of our personal goals. Each message is ultimately categorized as a positive (pleasure) or negative (pain) experience, and anything that the subconscious mind does not recognize falls under the category of “pain.” Even if the conscious mind questions the behavior, its logic/reasoning/will-power/decision-making faculties will be no match for the unspoken acceptance of that action, in the subconscious mind.

Fortunately, it is possible to change or get rid of an unwanted habit. This change starts in the conscious mind, where logic, reasoning, decision-making and reasoning faculties hold court. This is the area of the mind where we notice that this particular behavior isn’t working and is even making life more challenging for us. Noticing and deciding that you want to make this change is the first positive step to making it happen. However, the real change happens in the subconscious mind. This is the area of the mind where the subconscious mental script was originally written and continues to be carefully, lovingly nurtured to keep us comfortable. Or so we think.

Because each of us is most suggestible to ourselves, when we feel discouraged or sad or unhappy or are even hungry, we may be more likely to not only hear but also listen to those negative messages. The more down on ourselves we become, the more we subconsciously behave in ways that reinforce the feedback we give ourselves. For example, consider the individuals who are running for President right now. Pay attention to the language they are using in their campaign: “If I become President” versus “When I become President.” Have you noticed a trend whereby the individuals who say when seem to be doing better in the polls and in recent elections? Of course there are other issues at stake and to consider, but it is striking how many more candidates who seem less confident about being electable are not doing so well or have suspended their campaigns.

For example, a John Grisham novel called Gray Mountain features a protagonist who recently been furloughed from a well-paying, high-status job as a lawyer. It is 2008, right before the recession. As a condition of her unemployment, she can keep her health-care benefits and a chance to get her job back if she does the volunteer work at one of the small law firms her P.R. department has recommended. After she receives nine rejections in one day while applying for pro bono (unpaid) work, she decides (conscious decision) that she does not want to get a tenth one, so she makes a conscious effort to change her negative attitude about her situation. Yes, the prospective firm is tiny by comparison, located in a tiny town and she will have to practice the kind of law she hasn’t done since she was in law school. She tries to be more optimistic and enthusiastic about the opportunity to practice real law for “real” clients, as time passes she discovers that she really enjoys and values the work she is doing at this tiny law firm, compared to the corporate law that she has become used to. She is finally doing the work that she (her subconscious mind and subconscious mental script) believes is truly worthwhile and meaningful for clients who really need her. The more she believes her work is valuable and valued, the harder she works to do the right thing for her clients. And the harder she works for her clients, the more they appreciate her and what she is doing for them. (Well, most of them. This is a thriller, after all.) The important thing to remember in this instance is that the protagonist’s subconscious mental script identifies with those ideals she originally held when she decided to become a lawyer. The idea and ideal of actually helping people resonates with what she must do to fulfill the conditions of her furlough.

At the end of the day, each one of us behaves in way(s) that fulfill our subconscious goals. Whenever we make a conscious decision to change a behavior, the success of that decision is largely dependent upon our subconscious mind facilitating that change. Remember: the conscious messages you pay attention to the most that reinforce which subconscious messages and which mental script most resonates with you. The more you listen to and believe the negative messages, the more you reinforce those negative beliefs. Conversely, the more attention you pay to and believe the positive messages, the more you reinforce those beliefs. Ultimately, the subconscious mental script and the extent to which your subconscious mind accepts these goals determine whether your desired behavior change can and will occur.

If you want to achieve a desired goal, pay attention to what messages you’re listening to!

 

 

Special Offer:

Hypnotherapy to Release Weight

Hypnosis for weight loss series: $2,000 for the 10-week series. Each session lasts approximately one hour and includes a free, digital recording of the hypnosis portion of the session. If you pay for the 10-week series up front it is $1,600 to save $400!

 

*May not be combined with any other offer. Not redeemable for cash.

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023

 

 

Emotional Vampires

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

(This blog was originally posted on May 7, 2014)

Photo by Rick Hustead

 

Vampires are very popular these days. They show up as main characters in popular television series and movies. They are heroes (or anti-heroes) in novels for young-adult and adult readers. The Count on Sesame Street teaches young viewers about numbers and counting. Finally, vampires represent a powerful metaphor to describe a person who literally drains someone else of positive energy and emotional fortitude. Maybe you even know or have someone like this in your life. Like the creatures represented in literature and on film, emotional vampires “prey” on just about anyone they can sink their emotional fangs into. Just like Kristen Wiig’s character of “Penelope” on Saturday Night Live, they are very needy individuals who try to one-up every other person in the room in order to feel more confident and in control of their lives. However, like the supernatural creatures they represent, emotional vampires share specific characteristics and must also observe certain behavioral protocols that make them easy to recognize and defend against.

 

How to recognize an emotional vampire:

• Emotional vampires have a lower vibrational energy than others around them.
• They are often in the middle of or just getting through some kind of emotional disaster. Part of their charm or attraction is that they give off a lost or needy vibe that motivates others to want to just look after them during a crisis. By then, of course, you are already “hooked” and eager to offer more support when another problem develops.
• They often revel in their negative experiences or other people’s disappointments.
• When you share a painful confidence with this person, he or she seems to be in competition with you to describe an even more distressing experience: “When that happened to me….” When you interact with an emotional vampire, you actually feel worse about what is going on in your life than you did before.
• An emotional vampire’s negative energy literally “sucks” out and dampens the optimism, good mood and spiritual/psychic energy of everyone else in his or her environment.

 

How to defend against an emotional vampire:

• Remember: Just like the vampires in horror movies, an emotional vampire must be invited or welcomed into your emotional/personal life. Whenever you feel uncomfortable in someone’s presence, pay attention/listen to that emergency alert from the primitive part of your subconscious mind, warning you to stay away from someone who could be emotionally (or even physically) dangerous to you.
• Be a true friend to one or several people and surround yourself with individuals who are true friends to you. These are people who like, trust and respect you. They are individuals with whom you share various mutual and separate interests. They may challenge you, but their support does not waver. They celebrate your successes with you, but they do not insult or ridicule you and they do not try to make you bad or worse about a misfortune. They look out for your best interests, and you do the same for them. They also “close ranks” around you and try to shield you from the negative energy of others who try to bring you down.
• Participate in activities that you enjoy doing and make you feel relaxed, happy, positive and self-confident. The more positive energy you give off, the more positive energy you will attract!
• Use your positive energy (attitude) to neutralize negativity in your environment. See my blog titled “Energy Exchange” for more information about how to raise the energy level in your environment.
• Finally, try this cool imagery exercise (one of my favorites!) to create a protective energy shield around you. Visualize, imagine, picture or pretend that you are surrounding yourself with silken strands of pure, positive energy. This energy is manifested as the most delicate strands of gold and silver light, more delicate than the silk of a spider’s web but millions of times stronger. (Remember: silk from a spider’s web is already proportionally stronger than steel. In other words, very strong!) Gradually wind these gold and silver strands around yourself, starting with your feet, and work your way up your body. These strands appear invisible to you and everyone around you, but only until the emotional vampire tries to get to close to you. Unlike a traditional spider’s web, this silk repels rather than ensnares the threat. These strands of beautiful, pure energy encase you like a knight’s armor. They are strong as iron but slippery as soap or ice. Since there is nothing for an energy vampire to hold or sink his or her fangs into, this person has no choice but to is go away and find another “victim.”

 

 

Special Offer:

Hypnotherapy to Release Weight

Hypnosis for weight loss series: $1,250 for 10-week series. (This is a $250 savings!) The $200 fee for the first session will be included in this rate only when the package is purchased up front. Book this package before June 30, 2023, to lock in this price as my rates will be going up on July 1, 2023.

*May not be combined with any other offer. Not redeemable for cash.

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023

  

Creating the Hypnotic Script

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

(This blog was originally posted on March 26, 2014)

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Photo by Rick Hustead

 

Each hypnotic script that I create for my clients is unique. It has to be, since each person is idiosyncratic and individual, even similar issues such as the desire to stop smoking, lose weight or increase self-confidence to speak in public will be as unique as the person who is wants to replace or discard an unwanted behavior. Furthermore, the origins of that unwanted behavior or habit will vary as much as each person’s reasons and motivations to change it and the degree of their suggestibility (how they learn). While I have and know many basic hypnotherapeutic “ingredients” to help my clients achieve their specific vocational and avocational self-improvement goal, it is up to me to create the specific “recipe” that will achieve this objective.

I create and tailor hypnotic scripts in a three-part process:

1.     First, I actively listen to what the person is telling me/explaining about his or her situation and goals to change a behavior. I will ask questions and even re-state or reframe what the person has said to make sure I understand what is going on.

2.   Meanwhile, I will be processing/integrating this information into a basic hypnotic script that I already know is or will be useful to address this issue. Literally hundreds of generic hypnotic scripts exist to address various topics, but each one is not necessarily appropriate for or applicable to every situation.

3. Next, I construct the actual script using the client’s own words (descriptions) about why, how, when, etc., he or she wants to change the unwanted behavior based on his or her suggestibility. If the person is a physical suggestible, I know that the person’s subconscious will understand and process direct and literal suggestions such as, “Your eyes are closing.”) An emotional suggestible client’s subconscious will respond to indirect or metaphoric suggestions, such as “Your eyelids feel heavy.”

Once I choose a working framework for the hypnotic script I will use, I can be somewhat creative with how/when/where I include the client’s specific words or phrases in the suggestions. I may incorporate an imagery exercise or specific elements from a different (albeit related) script to support the hypnotherapy work I am doing with a particular client. For example, I like to include imagery around the color red to reinforce the idea of “stopping” the unwanted behavior (e.g., eating sweets, smoking, nail-biting, etc.) whenever the person sees this color. I can also decide—even at the last second—to not do a particular technique with a client, such as Inner Child work, if I see that the individual is abreacting (negative physical response) to some suggestions, which could indicate that his or her subconscious mind is not ready to accept or process this information.

Basically, during this process I am following jeet kune do creator and martial arts legend Bruce Lee’s advice: “Absorb what is useful. Discard what is not. Add what is uniquely your own.” I take the basic framework of a hypnotherapy process and subtly tailor the script to make it specific and relevant for the client I am working with, based on the fast decisions I must make about which material to use and how and when to use it during the session.

Special Offer:

Hypnotherapy to Release Weight

Hypnosis for weight loss series: $1,250 for 10-week series. (This is a $250 savings!) The $200 fee for the first session will be included in this rate only when the package is purchased up front. Book this package before June 30, 2023, to lock in this price as my rates will be going up on July 1, 2023.

*May not be combined with any other offer. Not redeemable for cash.

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023

 

 

Really. I Can Hypnotize Anyone

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

(This blog was originally posted on February 23, 2016)

 

Photo by Rick Hustead

 

 

“I can hypnotize anyone.”

Has anyone ever told you this? Do/did you believe them?

As I have explained in previous blogs, each one of us is in a light state of trance at least twice each day: for 30 minutes when we wake up in the morning and 30 minutes before we drift off to sleep each night. Other examples include environmental hypnosis and even believing the negative self-talk (chatter) we sometimes tell ourselves when we’re having a bad day.

The first thing I tell every new client is to reassure, “You can only be hypnotized if you want to be.” When you contact me by phone or e-mail, I can be fairly confident that you are interested in hypnotherapy as a way to help change an unwanted behavior because other strategies to do so have not been as effective as you wanted them to be. Or, perhaps you are curious about hypnosis and how it works. Maybe you just want to give it a try because you heard it is very relaxing and it worked for a friend to reduce anxiety or helped a relative quit smoking. Whatever the situation happens to be, hypnotherapy is always a choice. If you don’t want to be hypnotized, you won’t be. This is also why I include the suggestion that you will only enter the hypnotic state “with your permission and only your permission.”

Perhaps you have watched a hypnosis demonstration on a cruise or at a magic show. The hypnotist randomly picks people from the audience and/or asks for volunteers to take part in the performance. The individuals who ultimately get selected to participate are not chosen by accident. Before the demonstration begins, the hypnotist has already identified and recognized physiological changes that indicate who is already “going in” to hypnosis. These are the ones who are most likely to be suggestible to instructions given during the performance. Someone who does not volunteer or is sitting in the audience shaking his head, etc., will probably not get asked to join the act. That’s okay, because he probably wouldn’t want to anyway.

The same principle applies in hypnotherapy. During my training to become a certified hypnotherapist at the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in Tarzana, California, I learned a variety of techniques to hypnotize someone. I learned how a client’s suggestibility (how you learn) would determine and direct the words and phrases I use to induce hypnosis. For example, if the client has an emotional suggestibility, metaphors and images such as “your eyelids are feeling heavy” would be the most effective way to encourage the person to close his eyes. Conversely, a physical suggestible client would respond better to the direct and literal suggestion of “your eyelids are closing.” Sometimes, if a person is highly analytical, the most effective hypnotic induction is the auto-dual technique, wherein the client essentially hypnotizes him- or herself. Regardless of the technique I use during the induction, I use my client’s own words in the hypnotic to describe goals, motivations and reasons to change an unwanted behavior and achieve a vocational or avocational self-improvement goal.

Since we are all most suggestible to ourselves, ultimately, it is the hypnotherapy client—the person sitting in that chair or recliner—who is hypnotizing him- or herself. Claiming to be able to hypnotize “anyone” is a bit of an overgeneralization. Ultimately, the person being “hypnotized” must be suggestible to you and willing to enter a hypnotic trance in the first place.

 

 

Special Offer:

Hypnotherapy to Release Weight

Hypnosis for weight loss series: $1,250 for 10-week series. (This is a $250 savings!) The $200 fee for the first session will be included in this rate only when the package is purchased up front. Book this package before June 30, 2023, to lock in this price as my rates will be going up on July 1, 2023.

*May not be combined with any other offer. Not redeemable for cash.

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023

 

The Critical Area of the Mind

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

(This blog was originally posted on January 13, 2016)

Photo by Rick Hustead

 

I sat in the waiting area while my friend finished a meeting. While I flicked through a copy of Us Weekly, a man approached the reception desk and asked one of the assistants if it was possible for him to speak to someone in the accounting department. The receptionist smiled politely and suggested he sit down while she went to check if the person was available to talk to the customer. When she returned a few minutes later, it was to apologize: the gentleman he wanted to talk to was in a meeting. Could she have “Mr. Jones” call the customer later?

The man smiled slightly, nodded and walked out of the office, probably disappointed but he didn’t seem very surprised. He didn’t have an appointment; at this time of year, it would be very unlikely to squeeze in an impromptu meeting with an accountant. Guess what? This kind of solicitation and rejection occurs many, many times each day between the conscious and subconscious areas of the mind.

The “heavy” that sends the conscious mind’s desired new beliefs or behaviors away is called the Critical Area of the mind. This very small region of the mind is divided equally between the Conscious Mind and Subconscious Mind. Its responsibility, as it were, is to maintain the comfort (homeostasis) between these areas of the mind.

As I have explained in several previous blogs (Why Being Comfortable Feels Uncomfortable, Intuition, Because…That’s What You Like), your behavior is dictated by the subconscious mental script that is created very early in your life. This script is created by the multitude of positive and negative message units that the SCM processes and interprets as pain or pleasure during your early childhood. A positive experience, such as your pet dog licking your face in greeting, is classified as “pleasure.” A negative experience, such as burning your hand on a hot stove, would likely be classified as pain. However, even a message unit that is initially perceived as negative or “painful” can become recognized as “pleasure”, such as returning to or remaining in an abusive relationship because it is familiar or comfortable.

Conversely, if your dog bites (instead of licks) your face, or you decide to stand up to or even leave an abusive partner, the Critical Area of the mind is likely to reject the new message unit that the conscious mind is processing. Rejecting this new information is the Critical Mind’s job: If the information is unfamiliar, it is uncomfortable and therefore unwelcome: What do you mean, Fido bit me? He doesn’t bite! It was just a love nip. Or, I can’t leave my partner; I have nowhere to go! Since this information challenges the known subconscious mental script, it is unlikely that you will accept this information and change your behavior right away.

Now, let’s put this model in the context of what the interaction I observed this afternoon when someone asked to meet with “Mr. Jones.” The receptionist (Critical Area of the mind) checked with the gentleman in question (processed the message unit) and reported that Mr. Jones was busy. Since the client was also not an expected appointment (unknown to the subconscious mind), she sent him away (rejected the message unit). You might also recognize this process when you check the Caller-I.D. application on your phone and decide whether to pick up the call or let a message go to voice-mail.

For more information about the role of the Critical Area of the mind, I invite you to read my blog titled, Why Are New Ideas Scary?

 

Special Offer:

Hypnotherapy to Release Weight

Hypnosis for weight loss series: $1,250 for 10-week series. (This is a $250 savings!) The $200 fee for the first session will be included in this rate only when the package is purchased up front. Book this package before June 30, 2023, to lock in this price as my rates will be going up on July 1, 2023.

*May not be combined with any other offer. Not redeemable for cash.

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023

 

The Practice Effect

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

(This blog was originally posted on November 30, 2016)

Photo by Rick Hustead

 

  

In David Brin’s novel titled The Practice Effect, the most effective (and valued) tools and equipment are old and well-used. Here on Earth, a brand-new axe blade is sharp and gets the job done in one or two swings. Conversely, protagonist Dr. Dennis Nuel discovers that same new axe is useless on an anomaly planet he is exploring compared to a worn-out counterpart with a dull blade and grooves where the user’s hands would have held it.

I loved this book when I read it in 1984, and the concept of a “practice effect” continues to fascinate me in the context of how the mind works. As I explain to hypnotherapy clients who want to change a long-term habit, the more they do or “practice” this behavior the easier, more automatic and, yes, “effective” it becomes. For example, when you learned algebra the symbols and arithmetic required to solve an equation probably challenged every mathematical skill you had up to that point. However, with practice you may have advanced to geometry, trigonometry or even calculus; if nothing else, you can apply simple algebra to work out how much tip to leave at a restaurant. Just like the grooves in the worn axe handle in Brin’s novel, repeating familiar behaviors eventually creates a subconscious mental script that reinforces their importance and value to the subconscious mind. (This attachment to a behavior such as smoking or drug use/abuse will be even stronger with a physiological chemical addiction.*)

The perceived value of a familiar or “known” behavior comes from the comfort you derive from repeating and practicing this action. However, it is also why changing or stopping the behavior completely is so difficult. Remember, anything new or different (unfamiliar) is considered “pain” in the subconscious mind. It is almost as if you are starting all over again, having to learn a new or even re-learn a previous more effective “old” behavior. In many cases, you have to keep practicing that other, less comfortable but more desirable way of doing things over and over until it, too, has developed a “practice effect” that is ultimately more valuable than that old strategy.

 

*California law allows access by California residents to complementary and alternative health care practitioners who are not providing services that require medical training and credentials. The purpose of a program of hypnotherapy is for vocational and avocational self-improvement (Business and Professions Code 2908) and as alternative or complimentary treatment to healing arts services licensed by the state. A hypnotherapist is not a licensed physician or psychologist, and hypnotherapy services are not licensed by the state of California. Services are non-diagnostic and do not include the practice of medicine, neither should they be considered as a substitute for licensed medical or psychological services or procedures.

 

 

Special Offer:

Hypnotherapy to Release Weight

Hypnosis for weight loss series: $1,250 for 10-week series. (This is a $250 savings!) The $200 fee for the first session will be included in this rate only when the package is purchased up front. Book this package before June 30, 2023, to lock in this price as my rates will be going up on July 1, 2023.

*May not be combined with any other offer. Not redeemable for cash.

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023

 

Correction, not Perfection

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

(This blog was originally posted on October 17, 2016)

 

Photo by Rick Hustead

 

 

 As with any behavior-modification program—which hypnotherapy is, by the way—clients typically come in with a list of all the things they believe are “wrong” with them. They can’t stay away from sweet or high-calorie/high-fat foods. They can’t give up cigarettes. They can’t get over the former spouse or lover and accept that the relationship is truly over. They don’t like to be or even feel safe when they are outside their comfort zone, an area that may not extend beyond the confines of their home. They “completely freak out” when they see a spider. And so on.

In addition to changing or abolishing the negative behavior, clients often want to know how it took hold in the first place. I couch this explanation in the context of John Kappas, Ph.D.’s model, Theory of Mind. Basically, the person learned to do “x” or adopted “y” belief by imitating, or modeling, these behaviors they observed in their social environment. A parent or guardian, peer or another role model explicitly or implicitly taught the individual to do it, and the person derived some kind of reward for doing it, too.

Another factor comes into play here, too: constant repetition of the behavior reinforces its strength and significance in the subconscious mind. There is a lot of truth to the expression, “Perfect practice makes perfect performance,” and this is especially true when it comes to reinforcing any behavior in the subconscious mind. Remember, the SCM does not know the difference between fantasy and reality, objective observation and a joke. So long as the behavior is giving the person some kind of positive feedback (pleasure), the individual will continue to do (practice) that activity. Furthermore, this practice is perfect, as far as the subconscious mind is concerned.

I help my hypnotherapy clients change unwanted behaviors or beliefs by rewriting the content of the subconscious mental script that previously reinforced those old patterns. Since everything we do and believe has been learned, these patterns can also be corrected and even un-learned when we decide they no longer work for us or serve our best interest. Then we can create a different, positive mental script and continue to reinforce the behaviors and attitudes that will help us accomplish our new self-improvement goals.

 

 

April Promotion: Hypnosis to Stop Smoking! $800 for six, weekly sessions lasting approximately one hour each week. This is a $100 savings! (A la carte sessions cost $150 each.) In addition, I will waive the $200 fee for the separate First Session if you purchase and book the six-week package up front.

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023

 

 

Empty Your Mind

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

(This blog was originally posted on August 19, 2014)

 

Photo courtesy of Sara Fogan

 

 

When I was an editor at Black Belt® magazine, I often came across the following quote in which martial artists were urged to practice mushin no shin or “mind of no mind” during combat or competition. Basically, this term philosophy urges you to empty your mind and turn off your emotions so you can think and perceive what’s going on around you. I had an opportunity to practice this philosophy while I hung out with Galahad this afternoon.

The time I spent with my horse was not in combat but in a kind of moving meditation as I groomed him. Once I had him secured in the crossties, I turned all of my attention to making him feel relaxed while I gently curried away shedding hairs and dirt. He did a lot of sighing and fluttered his nostrils a few times, so I am pretty sure he was beyond comfortable and probably a little blissed out during his mega-grooming session. (His first trainer commented several times that my horse is a bit hedonistic.)

Unlike Galahad, complete relaxation has never been easy for me; it is a rare day that I am not doing two or three things at one time. Even spending quiet time at the barn is not an inherently relaxing activity. For example, I always need to know where my feet and hands are to avoid being accidentally stepped on or nibbled when I give Galahad a treat. I have to be careful not to let my horse walk directly behind me when I lead him or he could run right over me if something spooked him and he bolted forward. When I ride, I must use various parts of my body to ensure that I communicate exactly what I want my horse to do and he understands what I am asking for. In addition, my entire body must be soft and relaxed while I remain aware of my surroundings and alert to anything that could spook my horse, including changes in my body that indicate I’m not focused on what I’m doing.

Of course, the reason why I sometimes have so much trouble quieting my mind and directing my focus is, multi-tasking is my go-to behavior. It is my known. Even though I was physically relaxed while I groomed my horse—the repetitive motions of currying and brushing are actually hypnotizing, pun intended—my mind was anything but. Random thoughts kept popping into my head: What should I blog about today? Has so-and-so received my e-mail? I have to get ready for that meeting tomorrow, etc. Whenever my thoughts drifted away from what I was doing with Galahad, he would politely by pointedly change his posture as if to remind me to pay attention to what I was doing. After all, this was his time to be with me and get fussed over.

Spending time with my horse is my favorite time of day and my absolute favorite thing to do, but I sometimes have trouble completely turning off the rest of the world even when I’m with him. Today was one of those days. I know I shouldn’t have to work so hard at relaxing but, let’s face it: sometimes tuning out is really hard work. My conscious mind knows that it should not be more stressful to relax and take time to decompress from the day than it is for me to multi-task various responsibilities I must fulfill and projects to complete during the day. My subconscious mind knows otherwise: Multitasking is my default, go-to behavior. It is a subconscious known, an established behavior, a subconscious mental script. Furthermore, according to John Kappas, Ph.D.’s Theory of Mind, I reinforce that behavior every day, when I am working (e.g., preparing for a session, working and following up with clients after their appointment and taking continuing education courses). Then I go out to the barn and ride/hang out with my horse, where I typically do several things at the barn just to stay safe. (As much as I love and trust Galahad, I know that I am physically no match against his 900-pound might if I ended up in the wrong place at the wrong time.)

Well, I have been working very diligently to rewrite that old subconscious mental script that says I have to multi-task every minute of my day. I’m pleased to say that after a few false starts this afternoon I was finally able to get into a groove with Galahad when I was able to tune out that extra chatter in my head for longer and longer periods of time. When I caught myself thinking about something that didn’t have to do with him, I simply re-directed my attention back on Galahad where it belonged. By the end of our afternoon together, the image and sound of him contentedly nibbling on grass and the earthy smells around me were the only thoughts on my mind.

Mind of no mind.

 

              

  

April Promotion: Hypnosis to Stop Smoking! $800 for six, weekly sessions lasting approximately one hour each week. This is a $100 savings! (A la carte sessions cost $150 each.) In addition, I will waive the $200 fee for the separate First Session if you purchase and book the six-week package up front.

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023

 

Have a Nice Day!

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE! 

 

(This blog was originally posted on January 25, 2016)

 

“When the world gets in my way I say, ‘Have a nice day!’” – Bon Jovi, “Have a Nice Day”

 

Image courtesy of Microsoft

 

 

 

What do you do when everything seems to go wrong in your day? I pondered this question while driving home from the barn this afternoon when “Have a Nice Day” by Bon Jovi came up on my playlist. It is so easy to internalize the frustration and run the unending loop of self-recrimination or to blame others when a plan doesn’t work out the way we plan or want it to.

Some people yell. Others get in their car and take a fast (and sometimes reckless) drive in the hope of blowing off some steam. It is always tempting and too easy to channel frustration and take it out on the next person you see, such as give the barista at Starbucks® a hard time for getting your order wrong. It is usually a little more challenging to just let go of your immediate (and usually transitory) angst to focus on what is actually going right in your day.

The late Dr. John Kappas, founder of the Hypnosis Motivation Institute, used to include the following suggestion in many hypnotic scripts: I like it. It was (and is) a great motivator when you are learning a new behavior, such as politely refusing dessert after a meal to comply with your weight-loss program. Even when something “goes wrong” or does not fulfill your expectations or desires, this simple suggestion enables you to open your eyes to the opportunities this inconvenience could yield. So, you burned the special meal you spent all day preparing for that special someone? Yes, that is inconvenient and frustrating. However, Dr. Kappas’s suggestion facilitated a new attitude and ability to see an opportunity in the experience—a shared laugh or maybe even an impromptu, very romantic picnic of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches on the living-room floor.

So, someone cut you off on the freeway and prevented you from getting off the highway at your intended exit? Once again, this new attitude of “liking it” enables you to pass the negative emotion (frustration) and continue on your way. Who knows, your unintended detour might steer you clear of a traffic jam further up the road on your intended route that might have also added even more time to your original journey.

Many of us have experienced a situation in which someone seems to be taking out his or her frustrations on us. This person hasn’t learned the power of Dr. Kappas’s nifty little trick of “liking it” and instead tries to feel better by making things more difficult or awkward for others. That’s okay. You can still turn the potentially unpleasant situation around by reminding yourself that you like what is happening because it the situation is giving you a new perspective/experience that you can learn and grow from. Then, as Bon Jovi does in their hit song titled Have a Nice Day, politely tell the person to have a nice day and walk away. It is impossible to experience two opposite emotions at the same time: e.g., anxiety versus relaxation, frustration versus optimism. Ultimately, saying and believing “I like it!” and expressing a positive outlook and sentiments for others enables you to improve the situation for yourself by finding opportunities where someone else may only see obstacles.

  

April Promotion: Hypnosis to Stop Smoking!

$800 for six, weekly sessions lasting approximately one hour each week. This is a $100 savings! (A la carte sessions cost $150 each.) In addition, I will waive the $200 fee for the separate First Session if you purchase and book the six-week package up front.

 

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, four years in a row (2019-2022). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2023