Compulsive Behavior and Hypnotherapy

 

(This blog was originally posted on September 10, 2014)

 

Photo courtesy of Microsoft

     Compulsive behavior can affect hypnotherapy by increasing the client’s resistance to modifying behaviors or habits that enable him or her to repress “unacceptable” feelings that may produce a secondary gain, such as recognition for being a hard worker. Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D. observed that obsessive-compulsive behavior can even impede therapy because the client may not be able to evaluate or accept the need to change the compulsive behavior that is helping to achieve specific goals. Furthermore, the person may also wonder how he or she will be able to resist the urge to repeat the compulsive behavior outside of the therapist’s office.

     Treating someone with an obsessive-compulsive issue is often a long-term process. While the client is completely dominated by thoughts about the presenting issue (e.g., fear of being alone), he or she may also have a strong abreaction (resistance) to any suggestions about changing the compulsive behavior (e.g., repetitive hand-washing). Therefore, it is important for the client to perceive that he or she will direct the progress of the therapy before the individual goes into hypnosis. “Tell the client what the problem is, where it came from [and] what you (the hypnotherapist) plan to do, and give the person options for treatment,” Dr. Kappas recommended.

      As the individual begins to change behavior, he or she must face unknowns in accepting the hypnotherapist’s suggestions for modifying those behaviors or belief systems that are no longer working. Furthermore, the possibility that the compulsive behavior garners a secondary gain, such as being identified as/receiving attention for someone who possesses a particular trait. Such identification may increase the client’s subconscious desire to resist letting go of the compulsive behavior, the hypnotherapist warned.

       Most important to facilitating a successful therapeutic process is for the hypnotherapist to accept the client and to provide unconditional positive regard for him or her, regardless of the presenting issue. Meanwhile, the hypnotherapist should gently direct the client toward recognizing which behaviors no longer work for or in that person’s life, and replace these with beliefs and actions that do.

       “If you don’t do anything in moderation, you won’t take pain in moderation, either,” Dr. Kappas said. “You’ll develop a mechanism of feeling how you want to feel, now. You don’t have to hold onto that pain.”

California law allows access by California residents to complementary and alternative health care practitioners who are not providing services that require medical training and credentials. The purpose of a program of hypnotherapy is for vocational and avocational self-improvement (Business and Professions Code 2908) and as an alternative or complementary treatment to healing arts services licensed by the state. A hypnotherapist is not a licensed physician or psychologist, and hypnotherapy services are not licensed by the state of California. Services are non-diagnostic and do not include the practice of medicine, neither should they be considered as a substitute for licensed medical or psychological services or procedures.

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2015

 

Theory of Mind and The Hundred-Foot Journey

(This blog was originally posted on September 9, 2014)

(Spoiler alert: This blog contains information about some key plot scenes. Please do not read it if you have not yet seen—but intend to watch this film!)

     This afternoon, I was treated to two hours of culinary Nirvana on the silver screen.

     The Hundred-Foot Journey captivated me from the first frame, when a little boy follows his mother through a crowded market to select food for their family’s meal. Of course, that little boy grows up to become the chef and a main character in the movie. What he learns about gourmet cooking and life turns out to be good lessons for the audience, too.

     In addition to admiring the scrumptious feasts that the rival restaurants present for their customers, I also had an opportunity to observe how neighbors from two seemingly disparate cultures opened their minds and their hearts to each other. This movie is an elegant illustration of how John Kappas, Ph.D.’s Theory of Mind can transcend cultural differences by initially hindering and ultimately facilitate people’s relationships and acceptance of those different cultures.

According to the Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder, human behavior is based on the subconscious mental scripts that we create during early childhood. From birth until about eight years old, the SCM is accumulating and storing various message units that will ultimately comprise the subconscious life script. Each message is ultimately categorized as a positive (pleasure) or negative (pain) experience. Anything that the subconscious mind does not recognize falls under the category of “pain”; the resistance to meet/welcome someone new into our lives or to try a new experience (e.g., flavor) is the mind’s way of protecting us from potential danger.

After Hassan Kadam and his family are forced to leave their home in India they ultimately settle in a small town in the French countryside. His father purchases a property across the road from a traditional French restaurant and decides to also open a restaurant (Maison Mumbai), which will serve traditional Indian cuisine. Hassan and his siblings initially protest their father’s plan: there is already a Michelin-starred restaurant across the street, they argue; anyway, why would villagers want to eat the fare they will serve? They probably wouldn’t like or appreciate the stronger flavors and the restaurant would never be successful. The family’s reasoning came from their subconscious fear of repeating previous failures and their belief that their neighbors would be afraid of the unknown (i.e., eating food they had never tried before). Papa disagrees: How do they know they won’t like it? They’ve never had it! His argument comes from the will-power, reasoning, decision-making and logical faculties of his conscious mind.

When the family has trouble attracting customers for the grand opening of their restaurant, the patriarch changes from the Western European suit he has been wearing and dons traditional Indian clothing (including a turban). He instructs his teen-age daughter to do the same, and the bright lights decorating the faux façade of the Taj Mahal in front of Maison Mumbai and lively, traditional music emanating from within attracts the guests. Papa Kadam obviously realized that the way to attract clientele to his new restaurant was by giving them what they already “knew” and therefore wanted: what they believed to be traditional Indian culture that matched the traditional Indian cuisine they were about to experience.

In my favorite example of how the SCM learns to accept new knowns and adopt new behaviors, Hassan Kadam incorporates a traditional Indian spice in a traditional French recipe. His new employer, Madame Mallory—the Kadam family’s former rival and the restaurateur across the road—is loath to make even a minute modification to a centuries’ old recipe. When she demands to know why anyone would want to change an old tradition, he patiently explains that maybe it is time for the old tradition to be let go. I believe the aspiring chef is able to make his case about this modification for two reasons. First, because his employer has previously tasted and enjoyed the traditional Indian spices he has incorporated in other dishes he has prepared, so these flavors are becoming more familiar or even a known to her subconscious mind. Second—and I believe more importantly—because the Kadam family’s personal and professional relationships with Madame Mallory had become more mutually respectful and even cordial. Just as Hassan was open and eager to accept culinary suggestions about how to create a traditional French meal, she had also become amenable to adding ingredients and spices from his traditional cuisine to the menu at her restaurant.

     This blog is just an appetizer, as it were, to the various culinary, emotional and human behavioral delights you will experience when you watch The Hundred-Foot Journey. Needless to say, I highly recommend this movie…just be sure to have something to eat first, because you might find yourself feeling very hungry looking at all of that sumptuous food!

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2015

How to Deal With the Naysayer

(This blog was originally posted on September 7, 2015)

Photo courtesy of Microsoft

       Every so often, we have to interact with somebody who holds very different beliefs than we do. In fact, this person seems so negative about absolutely everything that is suggested, we can’t wait to get as far away from this individual as we can, as fast as we can. Sometimes we even feel compelled to shoot back a few critical comments (in our defense) on the way out the door. To add insult to injury, we still sense that prickling cloud of negative energy swirling around this new environment long after we have achieved quite a bit of distance from the person. We wonder: Why did he say that? Why is she always so negative? Am I the only optimist left in the world? 

       The most effective defense against negativity is to simply not react to the criticism/insult or sarcastic comment. I know how hard this can be, especially when you must deal with that person on a regular basis (e.g., a colleague or family member). Remember: energy attracts like energy. When someone criticizes you in a non-constructive/mean way, the most effective way to defuse the negative situation is to smile and thank him or her for pointing “x” out to you. Then (politely) leave the conversation or room. If you cannot extricate yourself from the situation, imagine that the “criticism” or insult was spoken in a soft, gentle voice with loving words and try the following imagery exercises:

·         Visualize, imagine, picture or pretend that you are wrapping delicate threads of protective energy around your body, from the top of your head to the tips of your toes. These threads are gold and silver light, thinner but stronger than anything that exists in the world. As they wrap around your body, you notice how relaxed you begin to feel; and the more relaxed you feel, the more patient and loving you are toward the person(s) who is hurting your feelings. With each deep breath you take, these strands of gold and silver light grow stronger and stronger and wind more tightly around your body to create an invisible shield that prevents any negative energy to attach itself to you. Each time you exhale, the negative energy bounces right off you and dissolves into the universe where it can no longer affect you or anyone else.

·         Visualize, imagine, picture or pretend that you are surrounded by very powerful, invisible magnets. Usually, these magnets are used to attract positive energy and emotions and increase your self-confidence to motivate you as you pursue your goals. If/when you notice that you are surrounded by negativity or your subconscious mind gets stuck repeating a self-critical mental script, simply “reverse” those magnets to push the negative energy away from you.

There is no excuse for being rude or mean when you criticize someone. In an ideal world, a criticism should and would always be a teachable moment. Even if it is disappointing to learn that your brilliant idea has many flaws, if you correct those mistakes as suggested, your project could be great. Take a few deep breaths to tamp down that urge to protest in defense and give the other person the benefit of the doubt. No matter how the words came out or the tone of voice the person said it in, on second thoughts you may realize that he or she is speaking from personal experience and actually has your best interest at heart. And if this isn’t the case, feel confident and respect yourself to follow your original path to achieve your goal, your way.

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy®, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

© 2015