Reconstructive Surgery and Self-Esteem

(This blog was originally posted on August 18, 2014)

Photo by Rick Hustead

In a way, some instances of reconstructive surgery is like putting a bandage on a wound rather than healing the tissue that has been injured. John Kappas, Ph.D.’s Theory of Mind tells us that we start receiving message units the moment we are born. Between the ages of five and eight, we start taking these messages directly into the subconscious mind. Even negative messages that cause emotional pain, such as criticism about physical appearance or intelligence will be accepted and integrated to help form our life script. Negative messages create negative beliefs, and unless or until those beliefs are replaced with positive ones, our self-image will not improve even if the physique or appearance changes.

To further complicate this situation, we are strongly influenced by peers and social trend as we get older. Society also influences our personal beliefs about what we think is attractive. Furthermore, should we decide to have plastic or reconstructive surgery to “fix” a perceived blemish in our appearance, we still might not think those changes make us look better or more attractive. If you were constantly criticized about your looks or physique, no matter how clear your skin is now or how fit you are now, those early beliefs may still make you doubt what you see in the mirror. Increasing the number or frequency of reconstructive procedures cannot increase your self-confidence or self-esteem so long as your mental script believes otherwise.

In other words, the path to improving your self-image starts with improving that image—yourself-confidence and self-esteem from the inside. “Don’t put in suggestions about being attractive if it’s not true. Give negative suggestions about negative situations if you were different: i.e., the downside of being more attractive,” the Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder suggested. “You have to learn to live with [the way you look].”

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis MotivationInstitute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2018

Thoughts of the Day

Photo by Sara Fogan

Every now and then I like (and need) to take a few moments and remind myself about what is really important to me, in my life. If you follow me on my Calminsense Hypnotherapy Facebook page you may have seen some of these quotes before on this page, or will in the future. Many of these Quotes of the Day are beautiful examples and illustrations of the work I do as a hypnotherapist, so I will probably draw on them in future essays.

• “A dream is a microscope through which we look at the hidden occurrences in our soul.” – Erich Fromm

• “Failure is success if we learn from it.” – Malcolm Forbes

• “Be like a lamp, dispelling the darkness of ignorance.” – Dalai Lama

• “Be a yardstick of quality. Some people aren’t used to an environment where excellence is expected.” – Steve Jobs

• “If you're always racing to the next moment, what happens to the moment you are in right now?” – Lolly Daskal

• “If it’s important to you, you’ll find a way. If not, you’ll find an excuse.” – Unknown

• “Improvement begins with I.” – Arnold H. Glasgow

• “­To live a life with no regrets, love without measure: give, expecting nothing in return; initiate the kiss.” – Bille Baty

• “If they don’t help you grow, then let them go.” – Jeff Brown

1. “If I am not good to myself, how can I expect anyone else to be good to me?” – Maya Angelou

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2018

Client Cooperation

(This blog was originally posted on March 6, 2014)

Photo by Rick Hustead

Whether you want to change a behavior to improve your health or you simply want to learn how to relax, hypnosis is an effective, natural and drug-free tool that facilitates behavior change by accessing the subconscious mind. However, you must want to change your behavior in order for hypnotherapy to work. 

As I explained in my blog titled Be the Author of Your Life, “suggestibility” is how we communicate and learn. Even though you can be suggestible to many people, you are most suggestible to yourself. Therefore, I incorporate the specific words/expressions you used to describe your emotions and motivations/desire to effect the desired change when I craft your hypnotic script (suggestions). This means that you will be hypnotizing yourself.

Many people wonder if hypnosis will really work—and how it can work—on someone who has a razor-sharp mind and such a strong will (i.e., a stubborn streak) like theirs. Even though it is natural to subconsciously resist the process of becoming hypnotized at first, these initial doubts may even help to deepen your relaxation and comfort once you enter the hypnotic trance. However, you will not successfully change your behavior if you do not want to make this change.

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2018

Symbolism of the Dragon Scroll

Today's blog is written by Irvin Burton, a personal trainer and champion martial arts competitor based in Santa Clarita, California. Check out our special offer to promote weight loss and fitness at the end of this essay!

Hey everyone, Irvin here again. Today, I am a guest blogger for Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. and I wanted to write something that would resonate with her audience. While fitness and martial arts is my expertise, I know people have various concerns in their life outside of fitness and martial arts training. The other day during my workout, I was thinking why not start with a metaphoric story that can apply to anyone? So today, that’s where I’m going to start; it’s a movie I’ve seen many times. In the movie a martial arts enthusiast is chosen to be the recipient of the coveted “dragon scroll,” which allegedly holds the secret to limitless power. After intense training, the martial arts master hands him the scroll and the character opens it up and finds nothing but a blank scroll. Surrounded by other masters who are eager to witness the great unveiling, they are shocked and disappointed that the masters of previous generations would hand down an empty scroll claiming it had limitless power. What a disappointment!

Later, as the martial artist returns to his village embarrassed and disappointed, he speaks to his father who happens to be the town’s top chef. His father, empathizing with his son’s situation, decides to share the secret ingredient of his famous “secret ingredient soup,” a popular dish in town. The father leans in and says to his son, “the secret ingredient is…nothing!” Puzzled, the son asks if he heard him right and the father says, “You heard me, nothing!” The son asks why he didn’t add any extra ingredients to the soup. The father says, “Don’t have to, for something to be special you just have to believe it’s special.” The main character pauses for a second and takes out the dragon scroll. He looks at it closer this time and sees his own reflection in the scroll. He says to himself out loud, “There is no secret ingredient.”

What I like about this scene is the message it is sending to its audience; that “the secret” is essentially you and how you think. Whether you’re looking to become successful in a career, graduate from college, or start your own business, your success depends on you! How do you become successful? Well, you learn, you implement, and you stay consistent! Think about this for a second. Let’s say you want to learn how to cook. The first few times you may not get the meal right, but after 10, 15 or 20 cooked meals, it will probably come naturally to you! They say practice makes perfect, and after 12 years of martial arts training and many championship trophies, I can certainly attest to that.

The problems arise when you half-heartedly commit and don’t see any progress. Most people don’t stay consistent when they are trying to achieve something. In fact, most people stop at the “education stage.” They learn something but never implement what they’ve learned and certainly never stay consistent! I’ve found that most people are pretty educated on how to obtain their goals, however few take the necessary action to achieve them. Instead, they become the “guru” and tell everyone else how to achieve their goals. Would you ask someone who is poor how to be rich even if he DID have all the necessary education? Neither would I!

In short, your success (or lack thereof) is your own fault. No it won’t happen overnight;  and no, it won’t always happen the way you want it to. However, if you educate yourself, implement what you learn, and most importantly, stay consistent in what you do, you’ll succeed. People will take notice of your success. They will ask for your advice. They may even pay you to keep them accountable. Either way, there is no secret ingredient, it’s just you!

Thank you for reading blog today. I hope that I inspired you to take ACTION on your goals today. Remember that there are really no secrets to success; it’s just about getting started. The Famous comedian Chris Rock once said, “When I was stopped on the side of the road, no one stopped to help me. But when I got out and pushed my car, three of four people were always helping me.” People respect hustlers! Again, thank you for reading and special thanks to Sara Fogan for having me as a guest on her blog!

Irvin Burton is a personal trainer and martial arts instructor in southern California. He holds several college degrees related to fitness as well as a fitness kickboxing certification and is an international martial arts kickboxing champion. Irvin Burton is the CEO and founder of Tiger Crane Martial Arts and Fitness, a business that teaches kids confidence and discipline through martial arts training.