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A few months
ago, my dad commented how much he admired actor Benedict Cumberbatch’s success
in the film industry. He thought the Sherlock
star had suddenly hit the big-time since he went from starring in a British
television series about Sherlock Holmes to a lead role in the film about Julian
Assange; had a role in August: Osage
County, a major film starring Meryl Streep and Julia Roberts; and even
voiced the dragon in a recent Lord of the
Rings movie. Earlier this month, he was also shown goofing around with the
A-list celebrities at the 2013 Academy Awards. Of course, this was not an
example of Mr. Cumberbatch being an overnight success, at all. He had certainly
been paying his dues as an actor for many years—mostly on stage in Britain and
some roles in television movies and series in Britain and in America. Do you
remember his very minor role as a cavalry officer in Steven Spielberg’s (2011)
film, War Horse? Now that he has
landed roles in bigger projects, more people are starting to notice him.
One
of my favorite examples of what it takes to be successful is from an interview
that Clinton Anderson, a very popular horseman, horse trainer and founder of
Downunder Horsemanship, did many years ago. The trainer explained that it took
years for him to build his company and reputation as a horseman when he
immigrated to the United States from Australia. Apparently, he spent just about
every cent he had traveling around the country to do riding and horsemanship
clinics, and he usually only had one woman in his classes. Mr. Anderson said he
was willing to continue traveling, teaching and “treating [his students] like
queens” that way as often as he could and as long as he had the money to do so
because, hopefully, the next year that student would come back and bring a
friend or two. They did, and the rest is history, but his career did not take
off into the stratosphere for about 20 years of very hard work.
My
point is this: Success doesn’t just happen; it is the product of a lot of time,
effort, hard work and the intention and desire to succeed. This topic has been
on my mind for a few weeks, and I did address it in yesterday’s blog: “Are You
Ready?” (March 23, 2014). I did not intend to write a sequel to yesterday’s
essay. However, I figured I must have had more to say about it since this topic
was not only addressed on a radio talk show this afternoon but I also came upon
a related quote from Vidal Sassoon in a Twitter feed: “The only place where
success comes before work is a dictionary.”
In
John Kappas, Ph.D.’s book, Success Is Not
an Accident, the Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder explains how a
person’s mental script and subconscious messages influence how and where the
individual will direct energy and effort to realize a goal. Everyone has the
power to achieve a goal, Dr. Kappas says, if the “correct” mental script for
that success—like a road map or a recipe—is available and in place for the
person to follow.
The
thing is we often have to live life and accumulate a lot of different
experiences, good and bad, to know what we really want or don’t want to do or
have in our lives. Some people are very lucky in that they know very early on
where they want to be in 10, 20 or 30 years, and they just work hard and
steadily to achieve that goal. Other people experiment for a while: they switch
majors in college, change jobs over and over and even switch careers in the
search for a seemingly unattainable success.
In a way, I followed both of
those paths: By age 11, I had decided that I wanted to be a therapist. I
majored in psychology at college and then did a research Master’s degree in
psychology, in England. When I returned to the United States, I did a complete
180, career-wise, and worked for seven years at a prestigious martial arts
publishing company. I started as a proofreader and, eventually earned a
promotion to be one of the editors and a staff writer. By the time I found my
way back to my intended path as a therapist, I had done another year of training
in hypnotherapy and started my own
company, Calminsense Hypnotherapy. Did I mention that I also worked as a
barista for a time to help make ends meet? (I make a wicked caramel macchiato.)
The point I’m
trying to make is this: it has taken me almost 35 years of hard work and
experiencing life, trying my hand at different jobs/careers to appreciate what
I really wanted to do in order to be
where I am right now. It turned out that my ultimate career as a hypnotherapist
turned out to be not exactly what I had originally imagined myself doing when I
declared that I wanted to be a therapist. But life didn’t stop when I made my
“dream job,” so to maintain my company’s success I have assiduously been
marketing, advertising and networking my practice through social media.
Meanwhile, I continue to earning certifications in additional therapeutic
techniques that can help my hypnotherapy clients achieve their avocational and
vocational self-improvement goals. In addition to my background in psychology,
I can draw on the historical, philosophical and self-defense information I
learned and the social experiences I had working at the magazine to help build
rapport with and create metaphors and hypnotic scripts for my clients.
Sometimes when I look back on everything I have done and experienced to get where I am, doing what I love to do, I pinch myself and wonder how I got so lucky. And then I remember: luck had nothing to do with my success. Yes, I am still in the process of becoming the
person I always wanted/meant/planned to be, but I am that person because I have put in the time and hard work to get where I am.
Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in
Southern California. She graduated with honors from the
Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about
Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.
© 2014
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