Body Syndromes: Guilt and Sexual Frustration

 (This blog was previously posted on December 29, 2015)

Have you ever told an acquaintance that you can’t make it to their party because you have a headache—only to develop a bad stomach-ache that prevents you from attending a different event that you really wanted to go to? Alternatively, perhaps you have noticed that your period has become irregular or other symptoms of your reproductive organs.  If so, you may have experienced Guilt/Sexual Frustration Syndrome.

According to John Kappas, Ph.D., whenever a person represses or holds in (does not express) an emotion the displaced energy from that experience is converted into a physical “symptom” of that emotional trauma. Even though there are no nerve endings in the brain, emotions in the brain through our perceptions (e.g., smell, taste, sight, hearing, touch). Electric impulses carry this information through the body and begin to manifest physical discomfort in those areas that are specifically associated with a certain repressed emotion, the Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder stated.

Illnesses of the adrenal glands, hips, intestines, lower back and sexual organs typically manifest Guilt/Sexual Frustration Syndrome which are related to guilt and sexual/relationship problems. Symptoms related to this syndrome include: anorgasmia, constipation, irregular menstruation, Irritable-Bowel Syndrome, lower-back pain and prostate or ejaculatory dysfunction. Perhaps you feel guilty about not disclosing something on an official document or flirting with someone other than your spouse, etc. Alternatively, these illnesses can also manifest sexual/relationship problems, such as sexual frustration, sexual dysfunction, abstinence and sexual confusion.

As a certified hypnotherapist, it is out of my scope of expertise to diagnose an illness or to recognize/identify specific symptoms that have a psychological or physiological origin. However, once a licensed medical or psychology expert has ruled out a medical etiology of your symptom, with a follow-up referral from that licensed professional, I can continue to work with you in hypnotherapy to alleviate and/or control these symptoms. In addition, I can use hypnosis and therapeutic guided-imagery techniques to address the specific emotional trauma that has triggered those symptoms and help you to pursue and achieve your vocational and avocational self-improvement goals.

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2015

Body Language

(This blog was originally posted on April 25, 2014)

     I am fascinated by a television advertisement for mobile (cell) phone services. In the ad, a group of potential customers puts a representative of a major, national phone company through her paces as they ask about various communications features that the company offers. Viewers are led to infer that the prospective customers are real-estate agents, because each of them is professionally rand sports a tan blazer with a large emblem of a house on the left side of the jacket. The group pretty much verifies the identity of their vocation when one of the women says, “Let’s close!” and they all cross their arms over their chest and grin. But it is what the customers and the sales representative say with their bodies throughout the ad that is of greatest interest to me.

     Throughout the ad, the phone-company representative matches every physical and facial gesture that her prospective clients make. As a customer’s voice lilts at the end of a question, the salesperson uses a similar lilt in her response. When one person points a finger to make a point, the sales rep makes the same movement during her explanation. Someone steeples her fingers across her midsection; the sales rep makes the same gesture. Another person in the group nods and raises her eyebrows; so does she. When the camera pans back a little, viewers can see that the sales rep has even adopted a similar stance as she stands with the customers. At the end of the advertisement when one of the customers crosses her arms and announces they will all take (“close”) the deal, her colleagues look at her and immediately imitate the crossed-arms gesture.

     I like this ad because it is such a fabulous demonstration of how people mirror someone’s behavior in order to build rapport with someone. If your job entails selling products or services, you probably recognized every sales technique depicted in the advertisement I just described. But you don’t have to be a salesperson or a customer to identify with what went on. We mirror each other’s various behaviors—facial expressions, physical gestures, patterns of speech—all the time, often without realizing that we are doing it. These actions are like a “fast track” to building rapport with someone you would like to get to know better. People are naturally attracted to others who behave or seem to think like they do.

     Think about a conversation you have had recently: Did you nod at some point during the conversation or lean forward in your seat as if to listen to your companion’s words even more closely? And did your companion then lean his or her body closer to yours, return your nod or mirror a hand movement that you were previously unaware of having made? Did you notice when your spouse or friend took a step forward, backward or sideways to mirror your stance, or raised or lowered his or her voice to match the tone of yours? These are examples of mirroring; and mirroring is a subconscious (or conscious) behavior that creates rapport and can facilitate social bonds by reinforcing similarity or familiarity between you. Rapport is an inherent and necessary component of every kind of relationship; it is the cornerstone upon which every relationship is built. It is only when we establish rapport with someone are we likely to explore the similarities and differences between us, and know whether we want to spend the time and energy to create a social, romantic or professional relationship with that person. Without rapport, we cannot come to trust, respect, like or communicate well with him or her, and a relationship—or a successful sale—is unlikely to result from the interaction.

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2015

 

Hypnotherapy and Insomnia

(This blog was originally posted on March 12, 2014)

 

Photo courtesy of Microsoft

 

      Insomnia is described as an inability to sleep through the night. It may be manifested as a difficulty falling asleep or waking up frequently during the night so the person does not have a restful sleep. Physiological causes of insomnia can include hunger or a drop in blood-sugar level. However, the most common cause of insomnia is worry, which makes this condition one of the easiest behavior problems to treat, said Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D.

      When I work with a client to improve the person’s quality and quantity of sleep, the first thing I do is to help the person enter a deeply relaxed state of calm and comfort. When the individual is in hypnosis, I help him or her to deepen this sensation of comfort and dozy relaxation through breathing and progressive relaxation exercises. I also establish one or two physical anchors (e.g., the finger press) that the person can use to activate this relaxed, dozy relaxation when the person climbs into bed for sleep. I incorporate the client’s reasons/desire to sleep through the night and his or her suggestibility—physical (direct and literal) or emotional (inferential) to craft a customized suggestion for sleep. The ideal sleep suggestion is one that will induce the client to sleep “quickly, soundly and deeply throughout the night and will awaken in the morning feeling completely rested. The mind will be alert and active,” Dr. Kappas said.

     Post-hypnotic suggestions to drift into sleep include reinforcing the person’s sensation of feeling deeply relaxed, comfortable and free of stress. Using therapeutic guided imagery, I may also help the client to create a special box or safe in which to store or “lock away” any worries or concerns in order to get a good night’s sleep. (I reassure the client that he or she can always “unlock” the box and take out those issues to work on in the morning, if they haven’t already resolved themselves during the good night’s sleep.) I will also provide a final suggestion that the person will release in a venting dream any and all of the stresses or worries that have previously prevented the client from enjoying a sound, deep, full night’s sleep.

Following are some other practical suggestions to help sleep through the night:

·         Do not to watch television or play video games an hour before you plan to go to sleep (these activities can mentally arouse you too much to sleep).

·         Do not to take any sleep aids or drink alcohol to help you nod off: sleep aids can inhibit REM sleep and dreaming; and you are likely to wake up again once the alcohol has worn off.

·         Have a bedtime snack that includes some form of protein. A piece of roasted turkey or a glass of milk is a great choice because both of these items contain tryptophan, which is believed to induce sleep. Eating something before bed will also reduce the likelihood of becoming hungry during the night, which is associated with insomnia.

·         While you are in bed, practice diaphragmatic breathing. Draw a breath through your nose, deep into your lungs, hold it for four seconds and release through your mouth. Repeat this breathing four or five times until you feel your body has released any of the remaining tension that you have been holding onto during the day.

·         Once you are in bed, if your mind is still whirring from the day, count backward from 100 as you preparing to fall asleep. “Counting will help to put [you] in a completely relaxed and restful state that will facilitate falling asleep,” Dr. Kappas explained.

·         Systematically tighten and then relax specific groups of muscles in your body, starting with the muscles in your face and neck, then down to the shoulders, back, arms, hands, abdomen, waist and hips, thighs, feet and toes. As you do this exercise, visualize, imagine, picture or pretend that every area that you stretch and relax makes you feel progressively relaxed and sleepy. It is perfectly fine if you drift off to sleep before you complete this exercise!

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2015