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Wednesday, July 13, 2022

The Law of Association and the Law of Dominance

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE!

(This blog was previously posted on March 3, 2016)

Photo by Rick Hustead

During a typical hypnotherapy session, one of the most powerful tools to reinforce hypnotic suggestions is the Law of Association: an association between a suggestion (identification of a specific stimulus) and a specific, desired response. One example of this law is, when the hypnotherapist’s hand moves to dim the lights in the office and the client immediately, automatically moves to the recliner in preparation of being hypnotized. This association is possible because long before you come in for your first hypnotherapy session, the Law of Association has facilitated the development of your suggestibility.

In a therapeutic context, when I work with a client to overcome a fear or phobia, I create hypnotic scripts that enable the person to associate the relaxation response (deep breathing, focused mind, increased confidence) with a non-reaction to the original stimulus. Repeated exposure to that stimulus in conjunction with the associated relaxation response eventually extinguishes the fear or phobia.

When the Law of Dominance is employed during hypnotherapy, the hypnotherapist employs a stance of authority by assuming that the client will respond or behave in a specific way (e.g., go into hypnosis). An example of this law is when I say “deep sleep” firmly, not forcefully, and snap my fingers or touch the client’s forehead to deepen the hypnotic state. Through the Law of Association, the individual has already shown that he or she has already associated the link between my dimming the office lights and moving to the recliner. When I say “deep sleep,” these words instruct (directly or inferentially) the client to close his or her eyes as the person drifts into the relaxed hypnotic state that facilitates the desired behavior change (e.g., extinguishing a fear or phobia).

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Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. Sara has been voted the Best Hypnotherapist in Santa Clarita, California, three years in a row (2019, 2020, 2021). For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/

Tuesday, July 12, 2022

Schadenfreude and the Law of Attraction

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE!

(This blog was originally posted on March 14, 2016)

Photo by Rick Hustead

There is a scene in International Velvet when a horse on a rival Olympic team knocks down a pole and incurs a points-error. When the protagonist’s aunt Velvet sees what happened on television, she shouts, “Good!” The opponent’s error has made a little more room for her niece, Sarah, to secure a team gold medal if she can get around the course without making any mistakes. (Of course, she does.) But that doesn’t happen before Velvet’s partner, John, raises an eyebrow and comments, “That’s not very sporting of you!”

Schadenfreude.

I came across this word in the context of the plot in A Trick of the Light, a novel by Louise Penny, which I finished reading a few weeks ago. Basically, it means “deriving pleasure from someone else’s misfortune.” In the book, one of the characters is finally enjoying the critical recognition of her talent at a private show for her paintings, followed by a celebratory barbecue at her home. However, her husband and some friends discover the body of a former friend/enemy their garden the following day. The artist wants to celebrate the success of her show and budding career, but she feels guilty about wanting her art to be lauded even after the crime that happened in front of her home. Perhaps more disturbing to her is the eventual realization that her husband, a successful artist, has actually been jealous of her talent for many years and secretly hoped that the murder might derail her success a little bit.

In addition to the scenarios described above, Urban Dictionary lists several common examples of this experience: hearing someone shout “Hold the door!” while running for an elevator, only to reach the lift just as the door shuts. Or a straight-A student missing one question on a five-question quiz to bring the test score down to a B (80 percent). How about when the quarterback on the opposing team gets sacked after preventing your team from scoring a touch-down? Another example might be watching the value of a company’s stock shares plummet right after you have been fired. And so on.

It is not uncommon or even unnatural to feel happy about or want to get a small bit of compensation for our own misfortune. But, how “good” does it really feel? Does it make you feel happy? Relieved? Or do you scramble for all of the reasons why the other person deserved this misfortune or inconvenience so you can justify feeling good about it? Human emotions can be very tricky things. They can be accompanied by physiological sensations such as palpitations, change in breathing, trembling, etc. Sometimes censorial thoughts from the conscious mind (and conscience) intrude on these celebrations, too: Why do I feel good about someone else feeling bad?

Try this simple technique to get a different perspective about what is going on inside and around you: Draw a deep, calming breath and hold this air in your lungs for four seconds. Do not think about the situation, your emotions or why you think/imagine you felt the way you do or did when the situation first occurred. Instead, focus your attention on your breath and someone or something that brings you a lot of love and joy. Perhaps it is your spouse, or your kids, a pet, your job, a hobby, etc. Then, as you exhale, release the breath on the word love. Repeat this exercise several times to reinforce this positive direction of your attention.

In his book, Success Is Not an Accident: The Mental Bank Concept, Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D., explains how the mental scripts we program into our subconscious mind determine the outcome of our actions. Whether we imagine a positive or negative result, the SCM follows that subconscious mental script to actualize the goal you “want.” When we focus on enjoying the negative outcome another person is experiencing, we may also be reinforcing a subconscious desire for a similar negative event to happen to us. Conversely, when we send out positive, encouraging energy to celebrate another person’s success, we are also telling the subconscious mind, I want success, too! Whether that success includes getting into an elevator before the door closes or celebrating your partner’s triumphant art show, wishing another person well is more likely to attract good things to you than the temporary pleasure of schadenfreude ever could.

For more information about the Law of Attraction, I invite you to read my blog titled Intuition and the Law of Attraction and check out the book resources on this topic in Suggested Reading.

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Monday, July 11, 2022

Selective Listening

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE!

(This blog was originally posted on March 2, 2017)

Photo by Rick Hustead

Winning. Losing. Some people do a lot of one; others do a lot of the other. No matter what you do, the more you practice (repeat) a behavior, the more likely it is to become a habit. And as many of us know, it can be very difficult to change an unwanted behavior because, well, change is hard.

As I explained in a previous blog titled Traditions: It’s All in the Family, the subconscious part of the mind likes and wants to do what is familiar (known), because this sense of familiarity represents “safety” and comfort. Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D. proposed that human behavior is based on the subconscious mental scripts that we create during early childhood. During this time the subconscious mind is accumulating and storing various message units that will ultimately comprise the subconscious life script. We will behave and even think in ways that are consistent with it even when the script does not facilitate achievement of our personal goals. Each message is ultimately categorized as a positive (pleasure) or negative (pain) experience, and anything that the subconscious mind does not recognize falls under the category of “pain.” Even if the conscious mind questions the behavior, its logic/reasoning/will-power/decision-making faculties will be no match for the unspoken acceptance of that action, in the subconscious mind.

Fortunately, it is possible to change or get rid of an unwanted habit. This change starts in the conscious mind, where logic, reasoning, decision-making and reasoning faculties hold court. This is the area of the mind where we notice that this particular behavior isn’t working and is even making life more challenging for us. Noticing and deciding that you want to make this change is the first positive step to making it happen. However, the real change happens in the subconscious mind. This is the area of the mind where the subconscious mental script was originally written and continues to be carefully, lovingly nurtured to keep us comfortable. Or so we think.

Because each of us is most suggestible to ourselves, when we feel discouraged or sad or unhappy or are even hungry, we may be more likely to not only hear but also listen to those negative messages. The more down on ourselves we become, the more we subconsciously behave in ways that reinforce the feedback we give ourselves. For example, consider the individuals who are running for President right now. Pay attention to the language they are using in their campaign: “If I become President” versus “When I become President.” Have you noticed a trend whereby the individuals who say when seem to be doing better in the polls and in recent elections? Of course there are other issues at stake and to consider, but it is striking how many more candidates who seem less confident about being electable are not doing so well or have suspended their campaigns.

For example, a John Grisham novel called Gray Mountain features a protagonist who recently been furloughed from a well-paying, high-status job as a lawyer. It is 2008, right before the recession. As a condition of her unemployment, she can keep her health-care benefits and a chance to get her job back if she does the volunteer work at one of the small law firms her P.R. department has recommended. After she receives nine rejections in one day while applying for pro bono (unpaid) work, she decides (conscious decision) that she does not want to get a tenth one, so she makes a conscious effort to change her negative attitude about her situation. Yes, the prospective firm is tiny by comparison, located in a tiny town and she will have to practice the kind of law she hasn’t done since she was in law school. She tries to be more optimistic and enthusiastic about the opportunity to practice real law for “real” clients, as time passes she discovers that she really enjoys and values the work she is doing at this tiny law firm, compared to the corporate law that she has become used to. She is finally doing the work that she (her subconscious mind and subconscious mental script) believes is truly worthwhile and meaningful for clients who really need her. The more she believes her work is valuable and valued, the harder she works to do the right thing for her clients. And the harder she works for her clients, the more they appreciate her and what she is doing for them. (Well, most of them. This is a thriller, after all.) The important thing to remember in this instance is that the protagonist’s subconscious mental script identifies with those ideals she originally held when she decided to become a lawyer. The idea and ideal of actually helping people resonates with what she must do to fulfill the conditions of her furlough.

At the end of the day, each one of us behaves in way(s) that fulfill our subconscious goals. Whenever we make a conscious decision to change a behavior, the success of that decision is largely dependent upon our subconscious mind facilitating that change. Remember: the conscious messages you pay attention to the most that reinforce which subconscious messages and which mental script most resonates with you. The more you listen to and believe the negative messages, the more you reinforce those negative beliefs. Conversely, the more attention you pay to and believe the positive messages, the more you reinforce those beliefs. Ultimately, the subconscious mental script and the extent to which your subconscious mind accepts these goals determine whether your desired behavior change can and will occur.

If you want to achieve a desired goal, pay attention to what messages you’re listening to!

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Thursday, July 7, 2022

Consideration

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE!

(This blog was originally posted on March 6, 2017)

Photo by Rick Hustead

This afternoon I read a blog that really impacted me. In Subir Chowdhury’s essay titled The Power of a Glass of Water: Why Simple Acts of Thoughtfulness Matter Today, he considers the value of simple acts of consideration and the way such actions benefit other people at no cost to us. At the beginning of the article, Mr. Chowdhury recounts an in incident in which passenger asked a flight attendant for a glass of water before takeoff. The flight attendant told him that snacks and beverages would not be served in the Economy section until the plane was airborne. (The fact that Mr. Chowdhury and other people in the Business- and First-Class sections of the het had already received complimentary alcoholic beverages and snacks while the jet was still on the tarmac was beside the point.) The gentleman who asked for a glass of water was a senior citizen; the cabin crew refused to bring him anything to drink even after repeated requests and explaining that he was very thirsty. Finally, another passenger sitting near the writer in the First-Class section stood up, went to the galley and brought the other man the water he needed. While the flight attendant who refused to do this, herself, seemed a bit put-out by this action, he observed that the older man was very appreciative of the other passenger’s thoughtful gesture.

It is very easy to be thoughtful and considerate of another person’s feelings. Many of us can still hear one or both parents reiterating the importance of observing the Golden Rule of reciprocity: “Do unto others as you would have done unto you.” In other words, if you don’t like being disrespected, teased, hit, etc., it is pretty likely that others do not like this kind of treatment, either. Similarly, when someone does something kind or thoughtful that benefits you, this action should (hopefully) inspire you to do something good for another person.

Simple acts of kindness and consideration are easy to do and generally make both parties feel good. Examples include helping someone reach an item on a high shelf at the grocery store, assisting a person on crutches to cross the street or lending a person the use of your mobile phone to call roadside assistance to get his keys out of the locked car. Parents whose teenage son or daughter recently got a driving license are probably familiar with this one: Call or send a text message when you get where you are going, and then when you are on your way home! A smile or a compliment can make someone’s day. Mailing the rent check to your landlord on time or helping to clean up after a mess—even if you didn’t make it—are such little things we can all do with very little effort, but they can all mean so much.

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Wednesday, July 6, 2022

Mental Block, Mental Overload

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE!

(This blog was originally posted on March 13, 2017)

Photo by Rick Hustead

Some people are great at sports. Some people are wonderful painters or sculptors. Some people are fabulous wordsmiths. Regardless of their expertise, almost everyone experiences that horrifying moment of “choking” on the playing field or unable to harness that muse to create another masterpiece. When we hear the term “writer’s block,” it is common to imagine that the person suffering this very painful and stressful condition has no ideas for a subject to write about. But this is not always the case, as Carrie Ann Golden explained in her blog titled, “Sometimes Having Too Many Creative Ideas Hurt.”¹ Indeed, in this situation having too many creative inspirations can be equally paralyzing as we feel we do not have enough resources/skills/opportunities to express every idea that has come to us. Believe it or not, this situation is actually a direct path to, and example of, being in hypnosis.

According to Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D., the state of hypnosis occurs when an overload of message units disorganizes the inhibitory process (Critical Mind), triggering the fight/flight response and creating a hyper-suggestible state that provides access to the subconscious mind. This deluge of message units comes from the environment, the body, the conscious mind or the subconscious mind. We “escape” from this overload by going into hypnosis. Although hypnosis is generally perceived as a very comfortable and relaxing physical state, it is common—and even necessary—to experience some anxiety on the way to expressing the creative ideas bottled up inside.

To help a client overcome Writer’s Block or a similar creative obstruction, the first thing I must often do is de-hypnotize the person. This is a necessary step to release any previous subconscious mental scripts the person has created or follows regarding why he or she cannot or will not commit to one of those ideas. Sometimes the individual needs to learn how to allow the creative process to evolve and even be willing to discard an idea or plan that doesn’t seem so feasible or practical in the long run. Other times, the key to creative success lies in helping the person give himself or herself permission to pursue the topic that is most inspiring and motivational.

During hypnosis, I provide relevant suggestions to help my client organize and express these idea(s) creatively. Someone whose block is created by an overload of ideas may also appreciate the hypnotic suggestion that there is plenty of room in the subconscious mind to file and store inspirations for future projects. At the end of the session, once the client has returned to a fully alert and aware state, I teach the individual how to count out of hypnosis to prevent this kind of overload during the creative process.

1 Golden, Carrie Ann. January 31, 2017. Sometimes Having Too Many Creative Ideas Hurt – A writer & her adolescent muse (wordpress.com)

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Tuesday, July 5, 2022

Hypnotherapy for Health and Well-Being

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE!

(This blog was originally posted on January 5, 2014)

Photo courtesy of Fotolia

Hypnotherapy incorporates the client's words to increase
motivation to follow healthy behavior and improve well-being.

One of the most common requests I receive is to help someone, through hypnotherapy, to live a healthy lifestyle. Each person will have a specific issue or area that he or she would like to address and/or focus on or improve or change. Hypnotherapy is such an effective tool to facilitate these health-related behavior changes because the hypnosis scripts incorporate the client’s own words and motivations to achieve those goals. I further reinforce these suggestions by utilizing the client’s suggestibility (physical, emotional or somnambulistic suggestibility) so person's subconscious mind will comfortably and easily identify, accept and understand the hypnotic suggestions to incorporate the new, desired behaviors and accomplish the self-improvement goals.

Lose weight or maintain weight loss
Stop smoking
Improve quality/quantity of sleep
Exercise/increase physical activity
Reduce/manage stress
Make healthy food choices
Drink more water/increase hydration
Improve/increase motivation to follow the new lifestyle regimen
...and more!

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Monday, July 4, 2022

Hypnosis for PTSD

I am continuing to suspend in-person hypnotherapy sessions with me in my office. However, phone, and Zoom consultations ARE and WILL REMAIN AVAILABLE!

(This blog was originally posted on June 6, 2014)

Photo courtesy of Microsoft

Some people become very traumatized by their experiences in a war or while fighting a war, Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D. observed. “Any time a person goes into an extremely stressful situation, you start to anticipate the stress or danger,” he said. Even though soldiers receive specific combat skills, their survival depends on their ability to fight and kill as well as to deal with the horrors that they have experienced or witnessed on the battlefield: i.e., the fight/flight/freeze response.

Dr. Kappas warned that whenever a person represses the stress and emotions (e.g., fear, sadness, anger) experienced during combat, he or she is vulnerable to suffering “post-war depression” or, as post-traumatic stress disorder. The Diagnostics and Statistics Manual IV defines PTSD as an extremely complex disorder that includes psychological as well as physical symptoms of distress. These include: insomnia, bad dreams or flashbacks of the war experience, explosive anger, survivor’s guilt and difficulties integrating with or back into society. Job performance at work may and personal relationships with the spouse/lover, friends and family may also be negatively affected. Even if the stress is repressed when the traumatic event occurs, eventually these symptoms surface and must be dealt with, he warned. “Some guys 20 years out of the Service are fine and then suddenly break,” the late hypnotherapist warned. “After you survive in the military/war, if it’s the only thing you know, it can be a shock to face the real world,” Dr. Kappas said. Treatment for PTSD entails desensitizing the client to the stress of war and reintegrating the person back into his or her “old” life, including relationships and work.

On January 1, 2013, I earned a certification to use hypnosis to help people who are experiencing PTSD to reduce stress and symptoms in order to improve their quality of life. I use hypnosis, relaxation/breathing and therapeutic guided imagery techniques to teach these clients how to manage stress. I also employ cognitive behavioral-therapy techniques and exposure therapy to help the person separate (un-pair) the association between triggers of fear about the previous traumatic event and what is going on in their current environment. Because PTSD is such a complex disorder, I require a referral from both a licensed medical doctor and a licensed psychotherapist for me to provide hypnotherapy as a complementary therapy to alleviate, manage and control these symptoms.

I would like to thank each of the men and women who have risked and continue to risk their lives—and those who have sacrificed their lives—to protect and defend our country. I will not forget you.

California law allows access by California residents to complementary and alternative health care practitioners who are not providing services that require medical training and credentials. The purpose of a program of hypnotherapy is for vocational and avocational self-improvement (Business and Professions Code 2908) and as an alternative or complementary treatment to healing arts services licensed by the state. A hypnotherapist is not a licensed physician or psychologist, and hypnotherapy services are not licensed by the state of California. Services are non-diagnostic and do not include the practice of medicine, neither should they be considered as a substitute for licensed medical or psychological services or procedures.

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