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| Photo by Sara Fogan |
Many years ago,
a yoga instructor read a story at the end of class that continues to resonate
with me. The tale goes something like this:
Three monks set out on a walk to a
monastery. Each monk is carrying a heavy load of clothing and other goods to
donate to the poor. In addition, each one has taken a vow of silence, so they
cannot pass the time talking during their journey. They come across a
fast-moving river, where they see a young woman struggling to cross the water.
She is losing her balance trying to keep her parcels dry, at risk of slipping
into the water and drowning. One of the monks puts his belongings on the ground
and goes into the river to help the stranger get across safely. He may have
spoken to her at some point, just to reassure that he would help her get across
the river to the other bank. Or, maybe he did not; but he was a gentle person
with a kind heart, and the woman instinctively knew she had nothing to fear. Since
he was very strong, it was easy to pick her up and carry the woman and her
belongings the rest of the way across the river to the opposite shore. Once she
was safely deposited there, the monk returned her bow to acknowledge her
gratitude and crossed the river again to finish the journey to the monastery
with his colleagues.
When they started walking, the first monk
could immediately sense the other men’s great disgruntlement and frustration.
Their strides and posture told him that they were very unhappy, maybe even
angry, and he wondered what could be wrong. Finally, one of the other monks
stopped and turned to glare at him. He said: “What did you think you were
doing? We have taken a vow of silence! We have sworn to avoid the company and
contact with women! And what do you do? You stop to help a maiden cross a
river!”
“You touched her and you spoke to her,” the
third monk exclaimed. “You broke your vow of silence and your promise not to
have contact with the opposite sex! How dare you?”
The first monk sighed thoughtfully. Yes, he
had done those things; but the woman was at risk of drowning in the fast-moving
current. What else could he have done, except try to save her?
“Yes,” he said. “I did those things. But I
put her down three miles ago. You are the ones who are still carrying
her.”
This tale
reminds me that it is usually a waste of time, energy and emotion to dwell on
an event that has happened in the past. That action is over. There are rarely
opportunities for a do-over. Often, we must make a split-second decision how to
behave, think or even what to say in a conversation. Each of those decisions will
be contingent upon the context in which they occur. As Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D., liked to say, we
all do everything exactly the right way at exactly the right time. That is
because our existing subconscious knowns, which are created by previous
experiences and beliefs, have programmed our subconscious mental script that
dictates how we will behave in that situation. Perhaps if the river’s current
had not been so fast or the woman had not been burdened with packages to carry,
the first monk may not have stopped to help her. Whatever earlier-life
experiences the first monk had or the beliefs he held about the value of a vow
of silence or celibacy versus the importance of saving a woman’s life, dictated
his decision to rescue her. And who knows? If that monk had not decided to
rescue her, maybe one of his other companions would have done so instead.
Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based
in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation
Institute in 2005. For more
information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.
© 2016
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