Defense Mechanism: Turning Against Self

(This blog was originally posted on January 14, 2015)

Photo by Rick Hustead

Sometimes, emotional pain or intense disappointment because something didn’t go our way can lead to self-criticism and self-recrimination (self-blame). Rather than direct our negative emotion toward the cause or source of this pain, we turn on ourselves. For example, have you ever told yourself that the reason a romantic partner ended the relationship with you was because you were unattractive and actually “unworthy” of his or her love? Have you ever scolded yourself for being unskilled and “hopeless” at your job when a relatively new, junior colleague got the pay-raise or promotion you deserved after you landed that big account? Or, have you ever blamed yourself for “doing something stupid” that resulted in an injury while playing your favorite sport or doing a maintenance project around the house? If so, you have turned against yourself, which is a form of defense mechanism.

I previously touched on this phenomenon in my blog titled Stop! Negative Self Talk. Every time we disparage ourselves we create powerful, negative subconscious messages about ourselves that undermine our self-confidence and self-esteem. Since the subconscious mind doesn’t know the difference between fantasy (imagination) and reality, thinking or speaking these negative beliefs in a moment of pique cause equal damage.

Like other defense mechanisms, turning against self is: 1) unconscious; 2) self-deceptive; 3) and it distorts reality through thoughts and action. According to the Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D.’s Theory of Mind, people are subconsciously motivated to maintain and/or restore a known physical and emotional status of comfort and security. Whenever someone says or does something that causes physical injury, hurts your feelings or challenges your beliefs, your mind automatically tries to compensate for this threat or “pain” by activating this or another form of defense mechanism. In this case, you turn against yourself to avoid having to experience the pain of rejection or disappointment that someone else caused you.

To help someone change this behavior, while the client is in hypnosis I desensitize him or her to the situation (and similar situations) that triggered this defense mechanism. I also employ therapeutic guided-imagery techniques to help them reframe their negative beliefs and self-recrimination to positive thoughts that are self-nurturing and promote self-love and self-confidence. Finally, I use imagery techniques to enable the individual to find solutions for those situations and visualize how they have overcome this setback and which lessons they learned from this experience have increased self-confidence and social coping skills. 

Limited Special Offer!

Save an additional 10 percent on the 10-week weight-loss package.

This discount only applies to the 10-week weight-loss program and may not be combined with any other offer. It is valid through February 15, 2019 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2019

The Metaphor of Professor Moriarty

(Warning: this blog may contain spoiler information about Sherlock: The Abominable Bride. Please do not read any further if you have not yet watched and plan to see this episode.)

 

Photo courtesy of Microsoft

     I had an epiphany on Sunday evening.

    I’m sure many an English-Literature scholar has already analyzed the dysfunctional, symbiotic relationship between private investigator extraordinaire Sherlock Holmes and his arch-nemesis, Professor James Moriarty. While watching the recent episode of Sherlock: The Abdominable Bride, it suddenly became very clear to me exactly who—or what—Moriarty truly was: the little voice of negative self-talk, of self-doubt, the incarnate version of Sherlock Holmes as his own worst enemy.

    Professor Moriarty is that little voice in the back of the great detective’s head that nourishes self-doubt and self-recrimination. He is the niggling voice in that never shuts up, constantly reminding Holmes: “You’re not good enough/smart enough/strong enough, and you never will be, to defeat me.” Since the detective is already in a highly suggestible state courtesy of his affinity for the Seven-Percent Solution (cocaine), he is also vulnerable to the drug-induced paranoia that that feeds his innate insecurity and questions about self-worth and identity. In short, the great intellect and sleuthing genius that characterizes Sherlock Holmes also make him the perfect foil for Moriarty, the only criminal whom Holmes has not definitively bested or defeated.

    Two scenes in Sherlock: The Abdominable Bride particularly illustrated the men’s symbiotic relationship for me. In the first, Holmes hallucinates that Moriarty is visiting him at the detective’s flat on Baker Street. Their conversation, if it can be called that, is more like a verbal duel. Ultimately they each draw their pistols and face off. Moriarty challenges Holmes: “We don’t need toys to kill each other. Where’s the intimacy in that? What do you want?” When Sherlock says he wants to know “The truth”—presumably about the nature of their constant stand-off and how Moriarty, whom Sherlock saw die several months previously, is somehow always at the center of Holmes’s cases and in his life. The criminal merely smirks and says, “It’s not real. None of it. It’s all in your mind.”

     In the second scene, Holmes and Moriarty are shown fighting in the rain on a slippery cliff at Reichenbach Falls. Once again, the criminal seems to be having the upper hand in the verbal and physical battle, even telling Sherlock: “Congratulations, you’ll be the first man in history to be buried in his own mind palace.” When Holmes insists that Moriarty is (should be dead), his nemesis merely replies: “Not in your mind. I’ll never be dead there. You once called your brain a hard drive. Well, say hello to the virus. This is how we end, you and I: Always here, always together.”

     At one point during the fight Holmes tells Moriarty, “You have a magnificent brain, Moriarty. I concede it may even be the equal of my own.” But just as Holmes acknowledges that he may have met his match, Moriarty reminds the detective: I am your weakness. I keep you down. Every time you stumble, every time you fall. When you are weak… I. Am. There. Don’t try to fight it. Shall we go over together? It’s always together. In the end it’s always you and me.” That statement—and what happened next—was a turning point in their conflict. It was also a great metaphor for Holmes (finally) realizing that he might need and even welcome some kind of (therapeutic) intervention to finally terminate the pathological relationship with his nemesis (himself).

     As if by magic, Holmes’s best friend and colleague, Dr. John Watson, appears on the cliff to protect and help save the detective’s life. Rather than use the pistol in his hand to shoot Moriarty, Watson gives Holmes permission to simply push his nemesis over the cliff. In order to truly work through the conflict in his subconscious mind and quiet that negative voice (Moriarty) forever, Sherlock Holmes had to make the first move. The time had finally come that the detective found Moriarty “a shade annoying” and was ready to make room for a new challenge outside of his own mind (palace).

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2016