Forgiveness

(This blog was originally posted on September 15, 2014)

Photo courtesy of Microsoft

Have you ever got stuck in a blame-game with someone, refusing to accept some responsibility for your role in the situation or to accept the other person’s apology for hurting you? Do you ever hold onto the anger and emotional pain about something that occurred so long ago that you don’t even feel those emotions anymore but keep holding onto them because…you don’t even know why? Would you be willing to let go of all that negative energy if you knew this release would help you feel better, to be at peace and free you from the emotional baggage you have been dragging around?

I recently saw this quote from Inspirationboost.com, and it really resonated with me: “Forgive. Not because they deserve forgiveness, but because you deserve peace.”

At some point during our lifetime, someone hurts us. This injury may be physical or metaphoric, intentional or accidental, but long after the physical wounds have healed some emotional scars continue to feel raw. To assuage this pain and gain a sense of control over what happened, we may claim that the injury was justified or believe that we somehow brought it on ourselves. Indeed, it can be very difficult to see past this pain when someone you once cared about is hurling verbal and legal barbs your way during an acrimonious divorce or dissolution of a business or social relationship. You may even resent and even guilt/shame for having ever trusted him or her with your heart (and your finances).

The problem with holding onto these negative emotions is you are the one who continues to suffer emotional pain long after the relationship is ended and you and the other person have parted ways for good. Whenever you dwell on the negative events that happened during the relationship and the sadness or anger that you felt at the time, you reinforce the strength and the habit of feeling (and feeding) those negative emotions. This continued bombardment of thoughts, memories and negative associations with the past relationship overloads the conscious mind, triggering the fight/flight mechanism and putting you in an even more hyper-suggestible state (hypnosis). Since we are most suggestible to ourselves, every time we repeat a thought or behavior you reinforce its strength and power in your subconscious mind. In other words, you are hypnotizing yourself to perpetuate this unwanted behavior. Ultimately, the most effective way to heal from that hurt is to forgive the person who inflicted it so you can pursue the life that you want and deserve to be living. 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/. 
© 2016

Thoughts of the Day

Photo by Sara Fogan

      Every now and then I like (and need) to take a few moments and remind myself about what is really important to me, in my life. If you follow me on my Calminsense Hypnotherapy Facebook page you may have seen some of these quotes before on this page, or will in the future. Many of these Quotes of the Day are beautiful examples and illustrations of the work I do as a hypnotherapist, so I will probably draw on them in future essays.

• “Confidence on the outside begins by living with integrity on the inside.” – Brian Tracy

• “If Plan A didn’t work, the alphabet still has 25 more letters.” – Claire Cook

• “The value of an idea lies in the using of it.” – Thomas Edison

• “To reach a goal we must set sail. Sail, not lie at anchor. Sail, not drift.” – Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

• “Worry is a down-payment on a problem you may never have.” – Joyce Meyer

• "Either you run the day or the day runs you." – Jim Rohn

• “When the day is over, let it go. Don’t dwell on what you could’ve or should’ve done. Tomorrow is another day and another chance.” – Mandy Hale

• “Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish on its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing it is stupid.” – Albert Einstein

• “Simplicity, patience, compassion; these three are your greatest treasures.” – Lao Tzu

• “Each one of us is the hero of our own life’s story.” – Lolly Daskal

 

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2016     

The Auto-Dual Induction

(This blog was originally posted on January 6, 2016)

Photo by Rick Hustead

Everybody can be hypnotized. It is actually very easy to achieve this state. Have you have ever driven past your freeway exit because you were thinking about something else? Have you ever been so involved in a video game you were playing that you lost track of time? If so, you were in a natural state of hypnosis. 

However, it can sometimes be more challenging to enter they hypnotic state in a clinical setting, during hypnotherapy. If this is the first time the person is being hypnotized this way, it is common for the client to (subconsciously) resist the process. That is why it is imperative for me (or any hypnotherapist) to establish a strong rapport and trust with the client to facilitate the first and subsequent hypnotic induction. 

As I have described in my previous blog titled Creating Your Hypnotic Script, I consider the client’s suggestibility when I talk to the person’s subconscious mind in hypnosis. For some people, a suggestion that is given as a direct or literal statement is more effective, such as, “Your eyes are closed and you are entering the state of hypnosis.” Others respond better to a metaphor or inference, like, “Your eyelids are feeling very heavy and you are becoming more completely relaxed.” Sometimes (high-emotional suggestible) clients must do the induction, themselves, to go into hypnosis for the first time.

When that happens, I employ the Auto-Dual Induction technique when a client is very resistant to hypnosis for fear of losing control. Created by Hypnosis Motivation Institute founder John Kappas, Ph.D., this technique essentially has the person do the hypnotic induction by repeating after me a very specific script that describes the physiological process of hypnosis. Since I will direct the pace and rhythm of this patter, the person is quickly overloaded with stimuli—listening to the words and repeating them—to  be able to over-analyze these changes as they occur. This overload prepares the person to feel physically and psychologically more prepared to drift more comfortably into the hypnotic state. Once the client’s eyes are closed, I complete the induction by touching the individual’s forehead and saying, “deep sleep” to deepen the hypnotic state further. I also give the post-hypnotic suggestion to re-hypnosis to facilitate future hypnotherapy sessions in which I provide the hypnotic induction.

Sara R. Fogan, C.Ht. is a certified hypnotherapist based in Southern California. She graduated with honors from the Hypnosis Motivation Institute in 2005. For more information about Calminsense Hypnotherapy® and to set up an appointment, please visit http://www.calminsensehypnotherapy.com/.

© 2016